23rd February 2017: New jab can beat diabetes.

Can it? Let’s find out!

A weight loss drug has reduced the risk of type 2 diabetes by 80 per cent compared to placebo, according to a new trial on at-risk patients.

I’m bored of this already so let’s skip to the end…

Professor le Roux, from Imperial’s Department of Medicine and co-author  said: “These groundbreaking results could pave the way for a widely used, effective, and safe drug to reverse prediabetes and prevent diabetes in 80 per cent of at-risk people.

So it’s a NO, then.

7th February 2017: Wonder drug to beat cancer.

Oh I love a good wonder drug, so I do. Especially one that beats cancer. Wonderful!

British man ‘cured’ as experts reveal amazing breakthrough.

Uh-oh! The pesky ‘inverted commas cured’ is here….

Cancer sufferers were given fresh hope last night after a terminally ill man was “cured” by a new wonder drug.

So that means it wasn’t just this new wonder drug that inverted commas cured him, right?

Now scientists hope the revolutionary technique could signal the dawn of a new era in combating cancer.

But what does this magical miracle do?

The unnamed drug is said to make cancer more “visible” to the body’s own immune system so follow-up treatment is more effective.

OK, so it helps in the general cancer treatment, which sounds great, but not exactly a CURE MIRACLE DRUG.

Last night Cancer Research UK’s head nurse Martin Ledwick told the Daily Express … “Clinical trials are a vital part of research and ensure that cancer patients across the UK get the best treatments.”

3rd February 2017: Best way to fight the misery of back pain.

A rather disappointing entry today as the answer isn’t even anything mad like bananas or standing on your head….

Over-the-counter pills such as ibuprofen are rarely effective when it comes to relieving chronic back pain, scientists have discovered.

In a ground breaking new study, just one patient in six achieved any significant pain relief.

Doctors say concentrating on exercise programmes to boost our core muscles, therefore strengthening the back, is much more effective.

Oh how dull.

30th January 2017: Drug to stop Alzheimer’s

Hurrah! Alzheimer’s is stopped! Again! Like all the other times the Express had a remarkably similar story on its front page.

Or is it?

Drugs to reverse Alzheimer’s could be just years away, scientists said last night.

Oh no, it’s that awkward “COULD” again.

Experts believe an experimental therapy could be the first effective weapon against the destructive protein tau.

A study suggests oligonucleotide could combat degenerative diseases like dementia and Parkinson’s by preserving nerve cells in the brain.

COULD this be any less scientific?

Breakthrough trials show it works in animals with researchers confident it has the potential to successfully treat humans.

Excitement came after mice were genetically engineered to produce a mutant form of human tau that easily clumps together.

Oh those poor Express Miracle Mice!

Alzheimer’s Research UK said:“While we don’t yet know how safe and effective such a therapy would be in Alzheimer’s this data provides a strong case that it could be a valid therapeutic approach.”

Bah!

26th January 2017: Eat mushrooms to fight dementia.

This is going to be another one  of those “COULD” stories, isn’t it?

Superfood could stop disease by boosting nerves in brain.

So the mushroom in question COULD be replaced by anything else that COULD also work?

A study of eleven types of mushrooms - some already used for medicinal purposes - found they increased grey matter by raising production of a chemical called NGF (nerve growth factor (NGF). The findings published in the Journal of Medicinal Food, suggest mushrooms are a potential ‘superfood’ which could reduce or delay development of dementia.

I don’t think this POTENTIAL miracle food story COULD be any vaguer.

Researchers reviewed the scientific evidence with regard to their anti-Alzheimer’s effects and found “they may fulfill a preventive function against the development of Alzheimer’s disease.”

Time for the science quote!

Professor Vikineswary Sabaratnam, of Malaya University in Kuala Lumpur, said: “Regular consumption of the mushrooms may reduce or delay development of age-related neuro-degeneration.”

”However, extensive animal and human clinical trials are warranted, which may then lead to designing functional food or novel therapeutic drugs to prevent or mitigate the effects of neuro-degenerative diseases.“

12th January 2017: Arthritis: How to beat the pain.

It is by exercise, a magic pill or a special miracle food?

Walking could be key to healthy joints.

Oh. Its walking. Or rather, it COULD be from walking.

Researchers found that moderate exertion could be the key to tackling a condition that leaves millions of Britons with crippling pain.

A study showed that older people needed only a third of the exercise previously recommended to help prevent the arthritis from getting worse.

Lead author of the study Professor Dorothy Dunlop said: “Even a little activity is better than none.“

Now we know!

7th January 2017: How a nap keeps your brain young.

Another miracle??? Or merely common sense?

Researchers at the American Health in Ageing Foundation examined 3,000 adults over the age of 65.

They found those who slept for an hour in the afternoon were better able to solve simple maths problems, copy geometrical figures and memorise words. Those who did not take a nap performed badly in the tests.

Well that makes sense but is it science?

“Moderate nappers had better overall cognition than non-nappers or extended nappers. Non-nappers also had significantly poorer cognition than short nappers.”

Science!

Consultant psychiatrist Dr Sylvia Tang said: “Sleep is so important for restorative functions, including memory, and now it looks like having a siesta, especially if you are older, may have medicinal purposes.“

3rd January 2017: Keep fit to beat dementia.

We’ve had this before and we’ll  have it again: endless variations of how keeping fit is good for you. Shocking news!

Staying in shape with regular exercise is the key to avoiding dementia, research has shown.

Is it? It it really? The key?

The brain disease is known to be linked to obesity and scientists have now found a chemical enzyme that exists in larger than usual amounts in the brains of people who are overweight or have Type 2 diabetes.

They say this allows the danger of dementia to be predicted in advance, giving patients a chance to ward off the devastating condition with a daily jog or walk.

The enzyme, known as autotaxin, is found in a protective fluid that surrounds the brain. Tests showed that the enzyme increases in those with failing memory.

The research team claims an increase of a single point in the autotaxin level raises the chance of being diagnosed with some form of memory loss by five.

Hmmm…. what does the Quoted Expert Near the End of the Article say?

Dr James Pickett, of the Alzheimer’s Society, said: “Evidence has been mounting for many years that keeping fit and preventing such physical conditions as Type 2 diabetes and heart disease can reduce dementia risk.“

I am stunned.

16th December 2016: Brush teeth to beat arthritis.

REALLY?

Brushing your teeth could help ward off the agony of rheumatoid arthritis, according to new research.

Panic over! It’s another “could” miracle cure!

Scientists have discovered that the same bugs that cause gum infections also trigger the crippling condition that blights the lives of hundreds of thousands of Britons.

Right…

The discovery adds to growing evidence that rheumatoid arthritis (RA) is linked with dental health.

… the new findings, published in the journal Science Translational Medicine, have important implications for prevention and treatment of rheumatoid arthritis in the future.

What does the boffin say?

Study leader Dr Maximilian Konig, now at Massachusetts General Hospital, said: “This research may be the closest we have come to uncovering the root cause of RA.”

MAY it?

Confirmation of the link between dental hygiene and RA means regular brushing of the teeth and flossing could help prevent developing the painful condition.

OK, I can now see how we got to that headline. How silly.

14th December 2016: Revealed: How to live longer.

Again? We get a variation of this one at least annually.

A positive outlook could be the key to a longer life, says a study. Being able to enjoy yourself as the years advance is linked to a lower death rate, researchers found.

I bet it COULD. It also could not be….

More than 9,000 Britons aged 50 and older took part in research to examine the importance of long-term wellbeing.

Participants were assessed three times between 2002 and 2006 using four measures of enjoyment of life, and subsequent death rates were analysed up to 2013.

People who reported high life enjoyment at all three assessments were 24 per cent less likely to die during the follow-up period than those who reported no enjoyment.

If they were healthy they would surely be more happy than their ill counterparts? Yes, this is Daily Express Science at work again.

13th December 2016: Statins fight Alzheimer’s

FIIIIIIIIGHT!!!!

Statins could reduce the risk of developing Alzheimer’s disease - the most common cause of dementia - experts have found.

That’s not a FIIIIIGHT!

Results of a study, published in the journal JAMA Neurology, have revealed taking taking the tablets for six months a year for at least two years reduced the risk of Alzheimer’s disease by 15 per cent for women and 12 per cent for men.

I’m getting more and more disappointed by this latest miracle cure, the more I read.

However, the effectiveness of the protection from the condition - a form of dementia - varied depending on the type of statin and the race of the patient.

Oh let’s just cut to the boffin bit near the end of the article…

Professor John Hardy, Professor of Neuroscience, UCL, said: “The possible role of statins in Alzheimer prevention has been debated for nearly 20 years.  This paper contributes to that discussion but does not really lead to a definitive answer: rather it suggests, based on health records analysis, that in some groups there is a protection, but in others there are not”

“This is a complex outcome and will need more studies to determine whether there is protection or not and who the protection works for. Prospective, rather thanretrospective studies are the most likely way this will be definitively sorted out.”

So no miracle fight after all :-(

5th December 2016: Eat nuts to help you live longer.

Another one in the occasional ‘X makes you live longer’ series!

A handful of nuts each day could be key in fighting a range of killer diseases, scientists claim.

Yes, it’s that pesky “could” again (as per usual).

Nuts are thought to possess such health-boosting properties some experts think they should be widely prescribed on the NHS.

Could we be any more vague? Boffin quote?

Cardiologist Dr Aseem Malhotra said: “This analysis adds further value to scores of clinical studies that reveal the positive health impact of regular nut consumption.“

Oh dear.

30th November 2016: Drink coffee to fight dementia.

Drinking three cups of coffee a day staves off mental decline reducing the risk of Alzheimer’s disease by more than a quarter, say scientists.

Oh yes, vague science is back as the lead story at last!

The world’s most popular beverage is rich in anti-inflammatory chemicals and antioxidants which are believed to boost cognitive function.

It’s getting vaguer…

A study found regular, long term intake may reduce the risk of dementia by up to 27 per cent.

Who did this scientific study?

The amount recommended is between three and five cups a day, said the Institute for Scientific Information on Coffee (ISIC) report.

So definitely not a press release masquerading as the lead story in a national newspaper.

11th August 2016: Diet to beat Alzheimer’s.

This again? All the Express miracle diets are basically Mediterranean ones with lots of fruit and veg, and less fatty things. Will I be surprised?

The diet has been hailed for giving all kinds of health benefits, but now research has revealed eating a Mediterranean diet boosts brain power and slashes the risk of Alzheimer’s.

It’s so easy!

What did the Expert At The End Of The Article have to say for themselves?

“What’s good for you heart is also good for you head and a healthy lifestyle that features regular exercise, a balanced diet and not smoking can help to lower your chances of dementia.”

9th July 2016: Statins fight cancer.

Right, let’s see if they actually do….

Statins could significantly reduce the risk of dying from four of the most common cancers, new evidence has revealed.

That’ll be another bollocks miracle cure headline.

The findings support previous research which has indicated that taking statins may offer protection to cancer patients.

Hurrah! / Boo!