Crafts, Goodies and Interesting Finds

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January 15, 2012

January 11, 2012

Day 2 and 3

Prisoner has not yet realized that lunch is needful. Dinnertime, while they were foods he was well accustomed to, there was much glaring up through eyelashes and close examination of food placed in front of him. Prisoner even smashed cinnamon sugar into his hair using dirtied hands has means. Could possibly be doing this to spite me, the warden.

On the upside, I am becoming extremely proficient in the jargon of the captive. At first, communication was rudimentary mostly consisting of gibberish to the untrained ear. After spending more than 18 mos with Prisoner no. 2, I have grasped the basics of his vernacular.

Breakfast was a cauliflower "mussin". He ate it. I gave a maniacal laugh. Triumph short-lived. Lunch was a sack lunch of another "mussin". Prisoner no. 1 had a PB sandwich. Veggie sticks or "d-taps", as prisoner no 2 likes to call them, was the reward. Prisoner no. 1 ate his lunch and got the "d-taps" as a reward. Prisoner no.2 failed to recognize the concept of lunch. While there was no battle, there was still one fatality--the mussin got smashed.

After repeated attempts at communication, I, the warden, finally realized that Prisoner no. 2 was trying to communicate "messy" and then "d-taps". After 2-3 "mussy" I realized that the cauliflower muffin must be dead. The evidence was smeared on the prisoner's face and shirt; the carnage was obvious.

Prisoner no. 2, when he realized that "d-taps" were not allowed without first eating the "mussin", agreed to eat the "mussin". I caught onto his ruse very quickly.
Warden: "Do you want veggie sticks?
Prisoner: "yahs"
Warden: "Well you have to eat this first." (offering muffin)
Prisoner: (Eyeballing mussin)
Warden: "Are you going to eat it?"
Prisoner: (Contmplatively) "No."

Repeat three times and the result was still a refusal. No "d-taps" for good behavior.

Today the prisoner fared no better.

Refusal of couscous at lunch. Was allowed some crackers and PB with prisoner no. 1.

Dinner. Both only ate their "go-guh" (yogurt) and even left their "hat dahgs" mostly untouched. Those poor dogs were sacrificed in vain.

Day 4 will be better.

My own previous warden, with whom I communicated briefly yesterday, stated that Prisoner no. 2 has already lost the battle, but just didn't know it yet.

I feel that Prisoner no. 2 will prove more willful than expected. But he is now a tired and hungry prisoner. It is only a matter of time.

I hope I can last that long.

Every Newsie Shufflin'

January 9, 2012

Getting my Kids to Eat Anything: Day One...

Battle One
The first skirmish in the Food Fray has been staged. Not sure if it was a win or a loss, but the opponent was a tough nut to crack. Getting something in, is like getting something out of Fort Knox. Nigh impossible. There was much weeping, wailing and gnashing of teeth, along with oatmeal hands being wiped from stem to stern and everywhere in between. Most of it went behind my opponents ears and down the front of his face as his hands slid from forehead to chin in apparent agony. I'd estimate the total battle time was about 40 min. What may you ask was the cause? The two-foot challenger found eating ONE bite of "sweet cereal" mortally offensive, if eating said cereal came before eating 'ot 'daws--hotdogs. Forty minutes! The young one's wailing must have translated to something like. "Help! I'm being attacked by my own mother, Save me!" because backup arrived. Jackson came over and was very upset I was the cause of Sam's distress. There was so much sugar in the oatmeal, the kid was practically eating dessert. I still got him to eat one bite. I tried distractions, ignoring him, letting him get hungrier, bargaining with cookies all to no avail. I did finally get him to eat one bite while distracted with a dollar store spinney top. Which he then later threw off his high chair and the thing broke. Like a said, did I win, lose or draw?

Tomorrow's assault has something new in the arsenal. Banana chocolate muffins with cauliflower in them. Short of feeding them intravenously, I'll do just about anything to get them to eat something else.

LOTS of work, but I'll be making chocolate muffins with cauliflower in them. Hopefully I'll get him to eat it later.

Child number one is also getting more food exposure as I'm putting food on his mouth. Then he gets to eat something else.

Battle One, not battle won.