Elliot's Grandma

Elliot just LOOOOVES his Grandma. Every day he recounts vivid stories of all the fun he has with his Grandma. He loves to talk about the special things he is allowed to do at his Grandma's house, the amazing toys at Grandma's, the candy he is allowed to eat at his Grandma's house, the dinosaurs he keeps at his Grandma's house. Wait, what? Yes, that's because while some kids have imaginary friends, Elliot has an imaginary Grandma. Not only that, but his Grandma is a dude. He is quite insistent on this matter. It is not his Grandpa, it is definitely his Grandma and this Grandma is a HE.

This fall when he first started talking about his Grandma I assumed that he was making up stories about my mom. It made me smile to think that he had such affection for my mom that he made her into the heroine of his imaginary tales. When my mom came to visit for a few weeks in September I was interested to see how he would reconcile his flesh-and-bones Grandma with the Grandma that he kept telling stories about. Now he certainly loves his Nana, and they had some real life adventures together (going to the fire department and getting to sit in the fire engines), but it was clear that the Grandma who lets him keep a spinosaurus for a pet, who shoots real guns, and who lets him stay up all night eating candy is a character not even loosely based on my mom, or Ryan's mom for that matter.

Elliot often uses stories about his Grandma to one-up Oliver. Oliver has been invited to a karate birthday party this coming weekend. Elliot is jealous but he expresses it by telling Oliver that his Grandma had a karate birthday party that was just for him. His Grandma also has a bounce house that he can play on any time he wants. When he is mad at me he tells me that I can't come to his Grandma's house. And then when he feels loving he tells me I can come to his Grandma's house for a sleepover.

This morning I was talking to the boys about being peacemakers. I told them that being a peacemaker meant trying to find a way to not fight. Elliot said, "Actually, my Grandma likes me to fight. He wants me to fight because I fight monsters. Dere are monsters at my Grandma's house. Dey have beebee red eyes."

I love his imagination and I love that he has an imaginary ally who spoils him and lets him do all the things he longs to do and always has his back. In that respect his Grandma IS a lot like his Nana.

Back on Track

Oh, man, has it really been almost 3 months (1/4 of a YEAR!!!) since I last posted. It's not like life has slowed down around here (au contraire!) but I haven't been recording or documenting it and I know, know, know I'm going to regret that. The boys are growing up so fast and I really want to be able to read and remember what it was like at this stage. I feel so rusty writing. I have a million things that I've been thinking about regarding the boys. For instance: Ollie's eating/weight/gut issues--I thought this was behind us, but he's had ongoing stomach aches and is losing weight again so we are seeing a pediatric G-I specialist. Elliot's behavior- it's improving but does he have ADHD???? Why is he such a handful??? Is it birth order? Are we not giving him enough attention? Are we not being consistent enough??? Is he just immature and is this something he'll outgrow?? Will he ever have friends if he keeps being such an annoying pest (his signature preschool move is to knock down other kids' Lego towers). Could Andrew be any cuter? How can I ever get enough of his adorableness??? Is there something I can do so that he doesn't turn out to be a picky-eater like his brothers? Is that genetic or does it have to do with my cooking/parenting?

These are just a random sampling of the million-odd thoughts that are banging around my head like so many loose pinballs. Maybe I'm experiencing so much mental chaos because there is this backlog of things that I need to address. I wonder if I wrote more often, perhaps made myself write a short little something every day, I wouldn't feel like I have cobwebs in my head or that I have mental constipation.

So, with that being said, I will not *YET* commit to writing every day, but I have already decided that my goal for 2012 is to focus on and improve my daily habits. I need to do a better job of attending to those little daily habits that become routines that shape our character. Broadly speaking, it is really so hard for me to be constantly vigilant and consistent. It is just not my strong suit. I am good at spontaneity and short bursts of energy and productivity, but not really great at sustained effort. So I'm hoping that if I change my daily habits I can just re-train myself to be conscientious without having to constantly think about it, it will just become my habit. So I won't try to change my nature (which I don't think will work anyway and will just result in frustration) but I'll just try to improve my "autopilot" so that certain things will just become routine. Some of the things I need to do DAILY are: floss, take a multivitamin, read my scriptures, work with Oliver on his reading. The things I do on a daily basis already that I am proud of are: exercise (running), generally being organized, keeping the house uncluttered, having one-on-one time with each of the boys, not letting the boys watch TV (except the occasional half-hour of this show called Wild Kratts on PBS Kids).

Non sequitor: I have been reading the boys Charlotte's Web each night before bed. It is wonderful! Even Elliot is interested and cuddles close to hear the drama going down in the Zuckerman's barn. This is one of the BEST parts of being a parent.

We are hosting two of Ryan's brothers, Taylor and TJ, for Thanksgiving this year. TJ arrived with his 7 year-old daughter Macy on Monday night. The next day we took them to the Lindsey Wildlife Museum, had a picnic at Larkey Park, and rounded out our day visiting the dogs and cats at the animal shelter. Taylor and Lisa arrived that evening with their kids. It's been fun seeing the boys developing good relationships with their cousins. Macy and Oliver get along really well. They are both pretty mellow and tender-hearted. David is sweet and funny too.

Thanksgiving dinner went fairly well. It was not the least bit stressful because we used the same menu and recipes we did last year. Ryan had created a spreadsheet that showed what needed to be done at each 15-minute interval (I've got to say I love having such an organized husband!). We made sweet potatoes, brussels sprouts, garlic mashed potatoes, stuffing, gravy, rolls, and turkey with maple-apple cider glaze. It was pretty good, but for some reason throughout the whole meal I kept thinking about Thanksgivings at my grandparents' house on Long Island. The food that we served tonight was good, but something was missing. It didn't fill me up the way Thanksgivings at Grammie and Poppop's filled me up. It wasn't as exciting (and Ryan even got out the crystal and china and we set the table so beautifully). I don't know what it was. It seemed sort of just ordinary. It was a feast in terms of the amount and quality of food, but there wasn't that same feeling of it really being an event that will last in memory. The kids were watching a movie while we were eating, so it was all very civilized for us, but nevertheless, it seemed like just a nice Sunday dinner. I'll have to give that some more thought because I can't put my finger on it.

Here are some pictures of the boys that don't go along with the post but I figure it needs some photos! Since we've switched to Mac, I am not using Windows LiveWriter anymore so I'm going to have to figure out a better way to post pictures than with Blogger. Anyway, here are the boys playing with sidewalk chalk in our backyard.

First Day

On Tuesday Oliver went off to Kindergarten. I feel like this is such a significant milestone but I’m feeling pretty emotional about it, too. I’m excited for him because I know he will just love it. He wasn’t nervous or concerned at all. And really, that was no surprise because he is so ready. He knows enough of what they will learn this year to feel really confident but not so much that he will be bored. He makes friends so easily. He loves to learn and follow rules (which is sort of what Kindergarten is all about, right?!) He already came home saying that there were some kids that were being naughty by spinning the globe really fast, but he was quick to point out that he wasn’t one of them! Anyway, this kid is going to be a kindergarten all-star. It’s not his adjustment I’m worried about at all. I’m sad for me!!!

I’m sad that this milestone represents his first step away from home and into the world. I have loved being able to be at home with my little boys in these preschool years (OK, except maybe the first few months after Andrew was born! That was really rough and I wasn’t exactly mother-of-the-year so I’m sure my kids weren’t having much fun either.) Someone once told me that “the days are long but the years are short,” and that feel so true right now.  Today, while Oliver was at school, I drove past the park where our playgroup was meeting and almost cried. I saw the little gaggle of moms with strollers and babies in arms and realized that these days are so precious and that they will be over before I know it.

The irony is that I am looking forward to their growing up. I am excited to enter the phase when all three are big enough to do things together. I’m excited to travel with them, to take them places that will ignite their imaginations (FYI…I’m not talking about Disneyland and there are no strollers in this vision of mine). I’m looking forward to going on a family ski trip (when everyone can conceivably learn to ski…maybe in 5 years), I can’t wait to teach them to sail (but they’ll need to learn to swim first), and I yearn for the day when we can all go to a museum and the boys won’t spend the whole time rolling around on the grass outside. I’m not trying to rush through the phase we are in now, but I am ALSO looking forward to what’s-to-come.

The fact that it’s half-day Kindergarten makes it a little easier. It’s not such a big adjustment, it’s just like preschool, but everyday. In fact, we made such a big deal out of the first day of Kindergarten that I almost forgot that we had to wake up and do it all over again this morning!! I had scheduled a repair man to come to the house today just as I would have had to leave with Oliver to ride our bikes over to school. I was able to reschedule, but I realized it’s going to take a while to adjust to this new routine. But here we go!! 

   Meeting his teacher for the first time.  

They start with the basics so the first thing he learned was the sign for “I have to use the bathroom” (It’s crossed fingers like “fingers crossed I don’t pee on the floor!”) 

First day of school, walking with his Dad. They had to bring a ream of paper and some other school supplies for the classroom which is why Ryan is carrying Oliver’s bag. Oliver was beaming when I came to pick him up and we went to get frozen yogurt for a special treat to hear about his first day. As expected he loved it! He announced that he had made a friend, but not only couldn’t remember his name, couldn’t remember what he looked like. Gotta love boys. A friend is someone who also likes Star Wars and wants to talk about poop, they don’t get too hung up on particulars like names or faces. 

Summer Running Club

Last Monday was the last day of "Summer Running Club." Oliver and Elliot both reached their goals: Ollie ran 10 miles and Elliot ran 3 1/4. Oliver was thrilled to get his medal (he wore it every day this week) and Elliot couldn't have cared less!









I am doing my own summer running club, gearing up for the Ragnar. This is the long run we did this morning. It was so beautiful I ALMOST didn't notice the grueling hills.








Last Saturday we ran the ridge trail. Or at least we tried to run it. It was so steep we had to pick our way down pretty carefully. This week we stuck to the jeep trail which was a little easier.

I am loving our early morning runs. I haven't run like this since grad school. It definitely reminds me of Ithaca. I ran every morning with a group of women who became my closest friends. There is something about the conversations that come up on these long runs that really let you get to know each other well. Running and talking, running and talking, you get into a zone and the miles go by without even noticing while talking about childhood, marriage, politics, hopes and dreams. The walls that we build up around ourselves come down and you learn who your friends really are. I love it! I find myself feeling profoundly grateful for my healthy body. It's something I don't ever want to take for granted. I feel especially grateful that after 3 kids I can still coax my body into some kind of athletic shape. I really could hardly walk around the block at the end of this last pregnancy so it feels so good to be active and strong again.

Stah Vors

Friday night was a big night at our house. It was the long awaited screening of Star Wars. Despite the fact that Oliver hadn’t seen this movie until Friday, he has been really into all things Star Wars for a while. He prepped for the movie by taking out every Star Wars “Easy Reader” book he could find at the library. He explained that it was so that he would know all the characters when he watched the movie. He was definitely prepared!

Well, it did not disappoint! Oliver loved it. Elliot was more or less into it. No one got nightmares afterwards. It even became the topic of Oliver’s talk in Primary on Sunday. That also was a big hit. The Primary kids were all really squirmy and distracted during Sharing Time until Oliver got up to give his talk. I was so proud of him! I did notice how distinct his speech impediment is when he was speaking through a microphone. I don’t notice it most of the time but somehow when his voice is amplified, his articulation issues also seem to get exaggerated. So Star Wars definitely comes out as STAH VORS.

Here is his talk. I think it’s hilarious. (I wrote it so maybe I shouldn’t say it’s hilarious.) But it was pretty awesome hearing Oliver deliver it in his cute little voice.

This weekend I got to watch the movie Star Wars for the first time. I really liked it. The hero of this movie is Luke Skywalker. At the beginning of the movie he is just a regular boy but he becomes a Jedi knight because he learns the ways of The Force. He uses the Force to fight evil, or “The Dark Side” and to rescue Princess Leia.

We are not Jedi knights, but we do have something that can guide us and give us power. It’s the Holy Ghost. When we learn to recognize and listen to the promptings of the Holy Ghost we can be comforted, protected and strengthened. When we follow the Holy Ghost we choose the right.

Luke Skywalker had to practice using the force before he could become a Jedi knight. We also have to practice following the “still small voice” of the Holy Ghost so that we can become more like Christ.

The villain of Star Wars is Darth Vader. Darth Vader used to be good. He chose to join the Dark Side. You can tell by how angry and mean he is that he is not happy he chose the Dark Side. In the Book of Mormon, Alma teaches that “wickedness never was happiness.” (Alma 41:10). This is certainly true for Darth Vader.

I pray that we will stay true to our Father in Heaven by making good choices and avoiding evil. I pray that we can all learn to rely on the Holy Ghost to strengthen us. I say these things in the name of Jesus Christ, Amen.

The Venice of California

Last week we spent a delightful four days with Abby and Adam and baby Charlotte in Venice, California. It was such a relaxing and fun vacation. I think what made it so much fun was that the activities that were fun for the kids were also fun for the grown-ups. There was minimal stress over supervision or entertainment. A notable exception was the excursion to the amusement park at the end of the Santa Monica pier. Some people love amusement parks (i.e. Ryan, the boys, the rest of the free world). I, however, detest them, and the “fun” of trying not to lose the kids gave me a MAJOR stress headache. But basically, we laid low and the kids were happy.  We went biking/running on the beachfront bike path, we built sandcastles and flew kites on the beach, we played games at the house, and Elliot went on lots of “adventures” that consisted solely of locking and unlocking the front door with the house keys.  It was total bliss.  

One of the highlights was the Getty Center. This is one of my dad’s favorite places and has raved about it for years so Abby and I were eager to go. It did not disappoint. The museum was shutting down for Carmageddon so we went on Friday. Ryan had to work from the beach house so he couldn’t join us, but our friend Michelle from high school came along. (If you hadn’t heard about Carmageddon, it was the non-event that was supposed to throw all of LA into a traffic-roiled mess (more than it usually is, I mean) when they shut down the 405 for the entire weekend for road maintenance.) Anyway, even though the kids mutinied and refused to stay in the galleries, the gardens and grounds were so enchanting that it was still a great experience. They especially loved the tram-ride up the mountain-side to get to the museum.

         I loved how every aspect of the buildings and gardens were exquisitely designed. One of my favorite details were these re-bar trellises for bougainvillea. Not everyone (ahem, Adam) thought they were terrific but I sure did. The rebar has rusted and now they look like giant sculptural trees.

It was quite surprising to discover that Venice, California has a series of charming canals—almost, [well, not quite] like the “real” Venice. Who knew?! I know what you’re thinking, when you hear Venice Beach you think exhibitionist bodybuilders and a head-turning parade of heavily tattooed, body-pierced, self-medicated skaters/surfers/runaways/carnival hucksters, but we discovered the quaint “Venetian” side of Venice.

 

 

This is where we stayed in Venice. Not on the canals, but on a cute little pedestrian street a block and a half from the beach. It was the perfect home base.   

         

We stayed in LA for four days and then took 2 days to drive the Pacific Coast Highway home. That was an amazing trip! I will post photos of that part of the trip soon.