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Monday, March 29, 2004
Michelle Branch - If Only She Knew.
I don't know whose side I'm taking
But I'm not taking things too well
I can see inside you're aching
But is it still too early for me to tell?
I try to help you out through the hardest of times
Your heart is in your throat and I'm speaking my mind
Though it looks as if it's over
I'm still not over you
'Cause I still love you like I did before
I know for sure that you still feel the same way I do
If only she knew
Whoa, if only she knew
I try to let it go
But I don't know if I can take it
'Cause the way you looked at me
Made me see that I can't really fake it
I try to help you out through the hardest of times
Your heart is in your throat and I'm speaking my mind
Though it looks as if it's over
I'm still not over you
'Cause I still love you like I did before
I know for sure that you still feel the same way I do
If only she knew
I know she loves you and I can't interfere
So I'll just have to sit back and watch my world disappear
I try to help you out through
the hardest of times
Your heart is in your throat and I'm speaking my mind
Though it looks as if it's over
I'm still not over you
Oh, I'm still not over you
'Cause I still love you like I did before
I know for sure that you still feel the same way I do
'Cause I will never ever walk away
I'll find a way
She could never love you like I do
If only she knew
gee, if only she knew.
gerard-andrew did a drumroll on 3/29/2004 01:59:00 am
rest of the first week.
on wednesday we had civics, or rather, bridge, at the oasis before watching some performance for arts education. a skit entitled 'love, lust or infatuation'. it wasn't very interesting really, and i kinda felt it didn't really revolve round any theme at all. had student profiling in the afternoon, which was a few of those tests to determine if you're a left or right brainer, that kinda thing. most of the time i was just spacing out and scribbling stuff onto lionel's paper.
had softball after school, during which yingying and kangqi came to visit. turned out that they got detention for skipping lessons to watch the show with us on tuesday, so we kinda felt bad. but nevertheless they had time to kill before their detention so they came to crash our softball training. just did the usual throwing and catching, and some fence batting. nick says i've got the strength to hit the balls but i just need to work on my swinging technique. and i think he's quite right because somehow swinging the bat just doesn't feel natural. i kinda need to work on my fielding too, especially with the pop-flies. took a nap at the grandstand after training. it's pretty comfortable lying on the bench there and resting. my new spot for R&R. =)
went back to sji for training but turned out that the coach fell ill. so i made a wasted trip actually. landed up having dinner at tanglin with my juniors and listening to their stories about gym. met a few of the sec 1s and i'm pretty amazed by their ability to think. let's just say that by the time they leave sec 4, they'll be well trained in thinking out of the box. =)
for thursday we didn't have lessons until 11 20, so the whole morning was spent playing, you guessed it, bridge. from there it was 4 lectures straight with a 40 minute lunch break in between. almost unbearable. kangqi crashed math lecture and it turned out that mdm yeo was lecturing. halfway during lecture she suddenly stopped talking, looked into the crowd, made some bewildered face, and muttered, "you're back.", and kangqi gave his silly grin as usual. hehe. that joker. yuqing dropped by for math lecture and nick was totally amazed to see her. the both of them landed up having a nice chit chat session for the entire hour and nick had to borrow my notes after lecture to copy. i guess to him it was a small price to pay eh.
over lunch we were playing more bridge and i was kinda teaching estelle how to play. so we delayed our softball training. training was pretty bad, in a sense that quite a few people got injured. and tammy ho made a big fuss out of it and proceeded to lecture the coach. i was pretty irritated with her because injuries are inevitable. of course the possibility of getting an injury can be reduced but there really is no such thing as a 100% injury-free record. and she really didn't need to cancel our training immediately and to vent her anger on our captains, afterall it wasn't their fault. and the way she put it, "i don't want to see them (softballers) anymore. get out in 15 minutes.". we're dedicated enough to be training for nationals and there she is not giving a fuck about us. and then it all goes back to the point that nj is really open-minded about sports. bullshit.
friday was pretty boring. had this 'love matters' talk, almost the same one as the one during confirmation camp. and i really didn't agree with the speaker at all. from what i gathered, he was trying to say that the sole purpose of getting married is to have sex, and the sole purpose of having sex is to have kids. uh huh. i agree about the part with no pre-marital sex, but i feel that the part on 'the purpose of getting married is to have sex, and ultimately, kids". totally doesn't apply to couples who wed but choose not to have kids. does it mean that they love each other less than a couple with kids? i don't think so. they screened the abortion video and i really didn't want to watch it. i guess i've just had enough of it to last a lifetime. i just didn't want to spend the rest of the day in depression.
we then had a discussion session in groups and chris, terrence, omar and i were in one group. and what more to expect from us. =) seriously, terrence is really good at the funny stuff (drug the popcorn!). however i quite felt that the class didn't really voice their views on the topics at hand. most of the time it was just chris and i having our personal conversations with the teacher. gotta be open about this kinda stuff. after discussion sessions we had a dialogue session headed by a group of teachers. mr mannen was really funny. it's a wonder how he can crack all those jokes while keeping a straight face. as usual nobody wanted to get the ball rolling, so sharon phua went up and said "let me tell you my love story." and mannen was remarked, in a sacarstic tone, "okayyyyyyyy.". haha. =D however her speech wasn't really much of a love story. terrence remarked that she probably didn't have one anyway. yong was there too and it was so weird listening to him talk about this kind of stuff ("marriage is a subset of love," he said -_-.)
a group of us then went down to toa payoh for lunch, then to serjing's house (chong mansion) to spend the rest of the day. serjing lives at this 9-storeyed apartment together with the rest of his extended family. 1 family per floor. and at the basement is this gorgeous billiard table in a room big enough to house around 4 bowling lanes. huitian as usual taught us new card games which turned out to be pretty corny. but that's huitian i guess, and the way she plays the game is really funny. at the best thing? she loses at all her games. =D stayed till around 18 30, finishing our game of billiards. it took about an hour or so to finish off all those coloured balls.
went down to njc on saturday for the softball friendly against the alumni team. i thought that i'd be able to make my debut, but i guess not. just landed up doing the usual basic training, then watching the match. actually i'm quite confident that i'd know what to do if i actually do get to play. i think i'm ready. nick, serjing and i then practiced catching at the end of the field nearer to nygh, where the rjc volleyball team was having a friendly. you figure it out. and that sneaky bugger kept throwing the ball really far away from me so that i had to go retrieve it, and he'd just sitting there watching her play. haha but i don't blame him, sometimes love makes you do silly stuff.
went for lunch at kap with the softballers, where i got to know thang and lihung a little better. went down to queensway with hongyi and liyan, where she went gaga over every pair of orange shoes or boots. hongyi sounded really professional when he proceeded to criticise every pair of boots we saw. i've found the pair of boots i want. $75, which is a rather reasonable price. right now i'm using reggie's old pair of boots, which are pretty okay, but i guess it isn't nice to be using his.
and today, i wasted it all away.
i think it's improving really, but i did wish you'd keep your promise. and i guess you've got your own reasons for your actions and i don't blame you at all, but i really hope you know that the more you run, the faster it chases, until you're out of breath, and then it'll get you. i'm on probabation now to see if there's anything wrong with me. i guess even though i'm way down there, i can be thankful that i still am able to be around. it could have been much worse. the most important thing i've learnt over the week is to be happy for what you have, and not to be depressed over what you don't.
because you might just get it someday. and then you'd be happy.
gerard-andrew did a drumroll on 3/29/2004 01:28:00 am
Tuesday, March 23, 2004
Peabo Bryson - If Ever You're In My Arms Again
All the loving you gave me
The feelings we shared
And I still can remember
How you touched me so tender
It told me you cared
We had a once in a lifetime
But I just couldn't see
Until it was gone
A second once in a life time
May be too much to ask but I swear from now on
If ever you're in my arms again
This time I'll love you much better
If ever you're in my arms again
This time I'll hold you forever
This time will never end
Now I'm seeing clearly
How I still need you near me
I still love you so
There's something between us
That won't ever leave us
There's no letting go
We had a once in a lifetime
But I just didn't know it
Till my life fell apart
A second once in a life time
Isn't too much to ask cause I swear from the heart
If ever you're in my arms again
This time I'll love you much better
If ever you're in my arms again
This time I'll hold you forever
This time will never end
Never end
The best of romances
Deserves second chances
I'll get to you somehow
Cause I promise now
If ever you're in my arms again
This time I'll love you much better
If ever you're in my arms again
This time I'll hold you forever
This time will never end
If ever you're in my arms again
This time I'll love you much better
If ever you're in my arms again
This time I'll hold you forever
This time will never end
while watching my girl today, this was the first song i thought of. been wanting to download this for ages since i heard it on american idol last season (you can imagine how long ago that was). but it's a nice song anyway. =)
gerard-andrew did a drumroll on 3/23/2004 11:50:00 pm
my girl.
went out with estelle, xinyu, serjing, edwin and kangqi on sunday for our last outing before we get separated. landed up at ps watching scooby doo 2 because there weren't anymore tickets for my girl. at first i didn't mind watching scooby doo, and serjing seemed really excited. but after 5 minutes of the show i realised that it was more of a kid's show than a show for all audiences. the theatre was packed with screaming kids, laughing at every single joke (most of which weren't really funny) and at every action. this kid in front of me even farted really loudly halfway. storyline wasn't too bad, i mean, how bad can a scooby doo movie get. but what really struck me was this part of the show where velma wished she was more like shaggy and scooby, while on the other hand, shaggy and scooby see themselves as screw-ups and want to be more like the rest. kind of makes you think about how we're all yearning to be someone else in real life and forget to work on our own talents. i found that pretty meaningful. cheryl and justine joined us, then we went around shopping for lionel's birthday present. landed up buying him a polo t-shirt at heeren.
monday saw the return to school, and the bus stop was flooded with lots of people. you could easily have separated the first and second intakers from the way they behaved. kinda reminded me of the first day of school. anyway, the class bench seemed rather bare without edwin, kangqi, yuqing and huijuan, who'll always be there when i arrive at school. somehow everyone seemed rather deminished and it was then that i really appreciated edwin for all his talking in the morning. went to lt5 for a briefing, then left to meet the new people who were staying with the class for the week and to choose our subject combinations. serjing and i were making a deal that if there were any chinese high guys who would join us, we'd go to the balcony and jump. and as (bad) luck would have it, we had not 1, not 2, not 3, not 4, but 5 chinese high guys. X( serjing and i immediatly ran towards the balcony when we saw them. it wasn't a total loss though; there were also 4 sji guys including omar.
went to the canteen for break and then had out introduction session at the grandstand. the 4 sji guys were nice enough to even show up and at least say hello. however, my already bad impression of chinese high guys plunged even lower when not only did those 5 not come on time, they didn't even say hello before leaving to go across the road to appeal into hwa chong. i was nice enough to say hi in the canteen, so as to break the ice. and all they did was to grab their bags, and leave, not even bothering to come say hi first. they just told lionel that they were leaving. i wouldn't have made such a big fuss if they had at least come over to introduce themselves first, but leaving without self-introduction is completely rude. peh.
in the end, we landed up having a class outing to kap, before returning for physics. had unofficial softball training after school from 14 00 to 18 00, where we practiced the usual catching, fence batting, and fielding. i've gotten the basics already so now i'm learning the more detailed stuff about the game. really appreciated the team for pointing out any mistakes and helping to correct them. left njc and went for gym at 19 00. training wasn't too bad i guess, just that he went all crazy and wanted me to do my dismount for bars. and so i was kinda freaked out and my ribs kinda hurt from hitting the bar. but pain is good. practically, i had 6 hours of workout that day.
today we had this talk about enterprise and innovation, which was a whole lot of rubbish. i didn't get what he was saying at all and i don't think most of the lt was listening anyway. for chemistry, mdm yeo's back at lecturing and when i entered the lt after break i found it packed...except for the 2 empty rows which was supposed to be for our class. naturally i was pretty surprised, because i'm always one of the last few in class to come for lectures. for a moment i thought i was in the wrong lt. then mdm yeo suddenly boomed "gerard, where's the rest of the class?" and i muttered something about them being on the way after break and got sent to find them, but thankfully they were right outside. hm, it was then that i realised that such stuff didn't happen when huichun was around. terrence then arrived 20 minutes late and his excuse was that he was buying uniform. haha. he added that he rushed for lecture as soon as possible and she was like, "so am i supposed to be thankful for that?" haha. sacarstic woman, but she's nice. =)
after chemistry, i bought my uniform and stuff, then went down with the class to ps to meet kangqi, edwin, yingying and yuqing. nick was totally mesmerised with her. we watched my girl and gosh, it's such a sweet show. i specifically liked tha part where jeab cut noi nah's skipping rope thingy just to prove that he was part of the gang, and then felt guilty, and won back lots of rubber bands to make her a new one. really didn't expect that. and the ending was excellent as well. definitely worth the $6.50. the few of us were also observing nick and yuqing during the show and we were pretty impressed. learnt a lot from my girl. jeab didn't get the chance to say goodbye to noi nah when he was a kid and the next thing he knew, they were all grown up and his childhood sweetheart was marrying another guy. the moral of the story? take all your chances now, because next time, it might be a bit too late to regret.
it came right on the dot...i'll remember that.
gerard-andrew did a drumroll on 3/23/2004 11:45:00 pm
Saturday, March 20, 2004
Hoobastank - The Reason.
As many things I wish I didn't do
But I continue learning
I never meant to do those things to you
And so I have to say before I go
That I just want you to know
I've found a reason for me
To change who I used to be
A reason to start over new
And the reason is you
I'm sorry that I hurt you
It's something I must live with everyday
And all the pain I put you through
I wish that I could take it all away
And be the one who catches all your tears
Thats why i need you to hear
I've found a resaon for me
To change who I used to be
A reason to start over new
And the reason is you
And the reason is you
And the reason is you
And the reason is you
I'm not a perfect person
I never meant to do those things to you
And so I have to say before I go
That I just want you to know
I've found a reason for me
To change who I used to be
A reason to start over new
And the reason is you
I've found a reason to show
A side of me you didn't know
A reason for all that I do
And the reason is you
i love this song...downloaded it together with 'out of control' when i heard it at the linkin park website. it totally fits in with my self-renewal programme. =)
gerard-andrew did a drumroll on 3/20/2004 11:12:00 pm
class bbq.
met cheryl, estelle, edwin, xinyu, and xinyu's little cousin at bishan on thursday to get food for the bbq. pretty amusing really, you can tell if someone actually goes grocery shopping or not by the way he/she behaves. i can't say that i do all the grocery shopping for the family, but i do go on grocery shopping trips almost every weekend so i've got experience as to what to buy, and where each item is found. xinyu's cousin is really cute. she's only 10, and her smile is so warm. complements the rest of her face.
went down to justine's house to store and marinate the food. and justine's brother is really hyper. he just bounced around the house (i chose 'bounced' because he's so chubby), giving people weird nicknames and playing with cheryl's ponytail. mine was 'spiky potato'. like woah. haha. but cute critter anyway. marinating the food was pretty fun, and we had a lot of tips from justine's maid, so we managed to settle that in an hour or so.
went down to town after that to go eat and buy stuff. went to carrefor and bought those cheap meals at the counter. which are actually pretty good. also got this pre-packed dory fish fillet. it was roughly $1 per slice for a pack of 4. it looked pretty yummy so we thought we'd get it. found a table then met lionel, who happened to be watching a show in ps. i accidentally let slip about his cake and he was pretty observant when xinyu tapped my shoulder to keep me quiet. so much for a surprise.
friday was a really busy day. packed the house in the morning, then went down to thomson plaza at around 16 00 to buy more chicken wings for the bbq as we were afraid that there wasn't enough. the problem was that i was supposed to meet the rest at justine's house bus stop to bring them to my place at 16 00. so i was 30 minutes late, but what's new. unfortunately my sandals gave way in thomson plaza (the soles were coming apart), so i was tripping over my own feet every 10 steps i took. horrible experience. finally made it to the bus stop and brought justine, estelle, kangqi and serjing to my place.
the rest then arrived group by group. had to go chase chris round the neighbourhood 'cause he got lost. bbq was pretty successful i guess, but instead of having too little food, we had too much. so i had to force people to bring food home. pretty pleased with the way everything went. no major cockups. but i wish that they had eaten more. but anyway it was pretty sad really, watching them leave for the last time, knowing that i probably wouldn't see them again. i just wish i had the chance to say a proper goodbye.
but on the other hand, bbq was really fun. nick was being his usual goofy self and all the guys were plotting against him. haha. could tell that everyon was having a good time. halfway through the bbq, everyone retreated to the study to watch love actually on the computer, and kangqi, edwin and i remained to cook 2 big buckets of chicken wings. and then both of them were amused by my obnoxious neighbour, who kept playing the same song over and over again on the piano, until they could actually hum the entire tune. haha. and right now the trumpet is blasting. thank god the brothel lights have come down.
by the way, i received a letter from the tanglin police department pertaining to last year's case where i was assaulted. turned out that the guy's been sentenced to 2 months imprisonment. i guess he got what he deserved, but 2 months is kinda short don't you think. actually i'm more concerned over how inefficient the police is. the incident happened on 30 april 2003 (i'll never forget this day) and they've taken like almost a year to settle the entire case. ironically, at the bottom of the letter is this seal which says "singapore quality award for business excellence". i don't think inefficiency counts as a form of excellence.
jae results are out, and guess what. even 10 points is a 50-50 chance of staying in nj. so out of a class of 27, only 18 are staying. it is, indeed, a sad day for the class. farewell to huijuan, yuqing, ying, huichun, huitian, chris, yucheng, kangqi and edwin. it was nice having you around in the class. ='(
gerard-andrew did a drumroll on 3/20/2004 11:00:00 am
Thursday, March 18, 2004
Evanescence - My Last Breath.
You know I can't stay long
All I wanted to say was I love you and I'm not afraid
Can you hear me?
Can you feel me in your arms?
Holding my last breath
Safe inside myself
Are all my thoughts of you
Sweet raptured light it ends here tonight
I'll miss the winter
A world of fragile things
Look for me in the white forest
Hiding in a hollow tree (come find me)
You know you hear me
I can taste it in your tears
Holding my last breath
Safe inside myself
Are all my thoughts of you
Sweet raptured light it ends here tonight
Closing your eyes to disappear
You pray your dreams will leave you here
But still you wake and know the truth
No one's there
Say goodnight
Don't be afraid
Calling me calling me as you fade to black
Holding my last breath
Safe inside myself
Are all my thoughts of you
Sweet raptured light it ends here tonight
gerard-andrew did a drumroll on 3/18/2004 10:12:00 am
Wednesday, March 17, 2004
more softball and gym.
went for softball training again on tuesday, but this time serjing came a long as well. so i had someone who i could practice with when the rest were doing hardcore training. i quite like catching practice, where the batter whacks long balls up the field and we're supposed to catch and retrieve. it sort of builds up confidence. but my batting is kinda weak now because i don't have the right technique. somehow it feels pretty weird when i swing the bat, not like the natural feeling at all. so gotta work on that.
after training i was supposed to go out and watch big fish but turned out that my friend couldn't make it. so i landed up taking a nap in the nj canteen alone. haha. from 14 30 to 16 00. it must have been pretty weird to any passers-by, i realised when i woke up. but i suppose when you're tired, you can sleep anywhere.
met serjing at bishan on wednesday for lunch, before going down to ang mo kio to meet the rest of the softballers. took a bus down to peicai secondary for the friendly match. actually the school's facilities are pretty good, i realised from walking around the school. they even have a pitching machine and we were pretty impressed. anyway we lost both matches, i guess because we fielded everyone so that everyone had a chance to play and gain experience. but of course, me having only attended 3 trainings, i have yet to make my 'debut'. =) i learnt a lot from the match, like the finer details and techniques. i just need a bit more getting used to everything before i start playing. can't wait for that to happen. on the other hand, nationals are apparently in 2 weeks so i doubt i'll be playing for the school. darn.
went back to sji after that for training. training alone can be pretty lonely at times, but sometimes you need that little peace and quiet so that you can do your stuff right. was generally pleased yesterday with myself yesterday. somehow i'm feeling quite affected by what i heard on monday. isaac told me that seechai referred to us as 'nj goons' or something similar to that. which was pretty shocking seeing that we were, afterall, his ex-teammates. so just because we're competing against each other, you create all that hostility between us. it's just not right.
you promised you'd try, didn't you?
gerard-andrew did a drumroll on 3/17/2004 11:11:00 pm
Tuesday, March 16, 2004
softball and gym.
went for softball in the morning. felt pretty awkward at first, 'cause i was the only one in sji pe while everyone else was wearing the team njc t-shirt. i really need to get one of those, and my number 69 jersey as well! =) basically spent training with the ip guys since i'm not experienced enough to be practicing on the field. reggie was teaching me a lot about fence batting. so i think i've made some progree today. =) not bad for my second training session.
after training estelle, nick and i went down to town to meet the class at cine. turned out that they were in k-box singing karaoke. -_- not my cup of tea. had lunch at yoshinoya, where huitian totally amused me (in the wrong way) with her lame jokes. some are just so lame that you feel like strangling her. but if they were told by a certain person i abhor, even edwin wouldn't be able to restrain me. grr.
after lunch, we wanted to watch a show but in the end we decided to go shopping instead. argh. we walked all around annex looking for stuff, then to esprit, then to taka. landed up sitting by the fountain where i fell asleep. rushed back to sji for training.
sitting in the dark room between the outside and gym is one of the nicest places to sit and reflect. =) training was pretty ok, but i guess i was tired out from softball earlier. so i was kinda tired and didn't have much strength to do the heavy-duty stuff. training with the young kids from wang's gym classes is pretty fun. some are so amazingly mischievious, that they really help to brighten up my day. =)
i guess my emphasis has shifted. thanks again, xiaomin. =)
gerard-andrew did a drumroll on 3/16/2004 12:51:00 am
Monday, March 15, 2004
what you feel is what you are, and what you are is beautiful. =)
monday, my outlook on the entire situation changed after talking to xiaomin. i'm really thankful for the gift of her because in that 1.5 hours, she really put my entire life into perspective. she practically reformatted my entire mindset, rearranged my thoughts, deleted all the negative feelings and installed positive ones. and after talking to her i really felt as if there was this huge load off my back. despite having the same situation ahead, she taught me to look at it in a different way and it was then that i no longer felt afraid...just hopeful. i'm so damn glad that she's my ogl. =)
tuesday. mathew and ben crashed nj. i think ben was particularly amused during math lecture by the lecturer who was so much like mr heng. i mean, even ben was amazed by his lameness. which is saying a lot, really. introduced ben to some of the people in the class and it was then i realised how outgoing most sji guys can be. anyway we were split into groups to do some mindmaps and ben and mat decided to leave halfway through. unfortunately, the lecturer saw them leave but thankfully he didn't get them to come back; he just said something about having surprise attendance checks. don't think he even considered that they were crashers in the first place. =P
wednesday. after school i went down to watch the softballers train and stuff, then hongyi suddenly asked if i was serious about joining softball. i said yes, so he referred me to the captain, who brought me to see mr tong, who told me to join in their training. =) so i was just standing around throwing the ball. nicholas was giving me a crash course in throwing and i think i've got the basics. yupp. and what really made my day was the people itself. i was just standing around when this guy came and asked me if i was joining softball, then he introduced himself and shook my hand. and one by one, all the softballers came to say hi and introduce themselves. everyone was just so friendly and for a moment i really felt i made the right decision. =) so i spent the rest of training practicing throwing and catching, before going down to sji for gym.
gym training was pretty lonely, 'cause it was just kim and i. isaac and shawn apparently can't train on wednesdays anymore. yep. did the usual stuff, then trained a bit of tram. in case you didn't know, i'm pretty useless at tram. have always been a floor person, but since this year is sorta 'freestyle', i just decided to give it a go. i guess i'm not -that- bad for someone who only jumps on the tram after training to relax.
on thursday we had our last pe lesson as a class, so the guys decided to go join the rest of the class for netball instead of playing soccer. really glad we made that decision 'cause firstly we had a lot of fun as a class, and secondly, i think i would have regretted it if i didn't. i guess i really enjoyed the last lesson together. really helped to build up class spirit. haha i guess i'm not really much of a netball person. i can't shoot for nuts. i'm strictly limited to flipping and catching. =)
to me, friday was arguably one of the saddest moments in my first 3 months of jc life. it was the last day for some of the people in the class as they were leaving for another jc. the whole week we've been taking photos around school, but i guess we took the most on friday. anyway we were released early 'cause of the a level results thing so some of us went down to ikea for lunch. the swedish meatballs there are simply smorgasmic, but i don't really like the cranberry sauce. haha. after lunch we went down to queensway 'cause yingying wanted to get boots. walking around queensway can be pretty tiring really, especially if you make it an attempt to pop into every shop comparing prices before buying stuff. yepp. met quite a few people there too. of all places, queensway.
afterward we took a train down to toa payoh to meet the class for dinner. had dinner at this zi cha place at one of the housing estates. haha think about it, how many classes actually have a class outing at a hdb estate? dinner was pretty good, but the portions were kinda small. after dinner we just hung around taking photos in the middle of the courtyard separating the 2 hawker centres. sounds totally weird, but for that moment, it meant a lot to us.
i then proceeded to waste my saturday and sunday by catching up on lost sleep. praise the lord that the holidays are here.
gerard-andrew did a drumroll on 3/15/2004 12:53:00 am
Monday, March 08, 2004
for a moment i thought i was gone.
somehow i've got this hunch that i'm in for a rough period of time. i hope you were telling the truth yesterday, 'cause for a moment, i thought i was a goner.
fuck lah.
gerard-andrew did a drumroll on 3/08/2004 01:22:00 am
Sunday, March 07, 2004
the very worst part of you is me.
monday was a holiday for year 1s because of the jae registration thing. we were supposed to have a class outing, but i kinda changed my mind about it because i didn't think anyone was in the mood to go out, and i was quite right. some were still quite depressed over the o level results. so monday was spent staying home and catching up on sleep. went for training in the evening and it wasn't that bad at all. just got a little lecture about punctuality. thanks to shawn and isaac for bothering to stay behind with me. =)
aston crashed nj on tuesday. saw him after getting out of the car with gaius and justin, and we walked in together, talking about all the things we do in nj. he was quite impressed with the numerous flight of stairs all the way from the main gate to the assembly yard. yep, one thing bad about nj is that there are too many stairs to climb. not good especially if you're feeling really tired after a 2.4km run for pe. anyway, back in class, nobody was really in the mood to study. everyone was discussing the results and whether we'd be staying or not. and even though i'll most probably be able to stay in nj, just listening to everyone talk about it can be rather depressing after a while. and i'll bet that was how everyone felt.
did my jae in the evening. put nj as first choice 'cause i didn't have anywhere else to go. but it MIGHT have been different if i had gotten 6 points.
wednesday. xinyu didn't come to school because she wanted to spend the day thinking about her jae. so we were pretty anxious in school that she'd make the right choice. anyway we attended some coucil question and answer session during civics and no offence, but it was total bullshit. felt that all the answers had the purpose of covering up the truth. it was claimed that the point of the merger was because they felt that by merging they could better enhance school unity, but i had an impression that they merged because they were forced to. i don't think any student would have been so free to think of a merger between the two groups.
school came and went, and after school we stayed in the canteen for lunch and played bridge. then everyone else left for cca but i had time to kill before training so i stayed behind and got some work done, and took a little nap in between. left nj at around 17 30 and went back to sji. juniors were still having training so i kinda went around talking to them. turns out that this year's sec 1 batch seems pretty promising. anyway, coach suddenly asked me if i wanted to join them for dinner and i kinda turned him down at first, but he asked again and so i agreed. turned out that he asked kim also. so it was pretty weird. him, some other female coach, kim and i took his car and went down to toa payoh to pick up julia (the female coach's 4 year old daughter) and then had dinner at the nearby hawker centre. so it was pretty weird. the coaches insisted on paying for our dinners, which we managed to refuse, and then they bought us drinks. sugarcane. which i don't take because personally i think it isn't clean. but i had no choice but to hold my breath and drink. ugh. nasty stuff. so after a torturous dinner, we went back to sji for training.
at first i was just training alone, but isaac came a while later. got back my high bar dismount. it was pretty scary at first (actually, everything is), but i guess i got it in the end. training ended, but i left something in the gym so i went back to get it. walking through the gym without any lights on is actually kinda cool. it's like having total trust in god that you won't hit anything at all. and of course, having improved night vision helps too. for details, refer to april 2003. and so everyone left, stranding me. but sitting in the sji carpark all alone at 22 00 at night is pretty cool too. it's a perfect place to think.
anyway, that day i experienced the effects of god's plans. xinyu had always been talking about leaving nj and so the night before i messaged her asking her to stay in nj. and i wasn't the only one. turned out that fenella and serjing messaged her too, and justine called her. and she received the 3 messages each time she was about to choose hwa chong. so i kinda figured out that god really meant for her to stay in nj. at times like these, you really wonder about how he plans our lives for us.
thursday was chris' birthday, so the class pooled our cash and got him a CK thong (CK - calvin klein, christopher kho), and decorated it with fabric paint, with suggestive words at appropriate places. =) he brought this whole bag of sweets and chocolates for the class and now it's in yingying's fruitpunch bowl at the back of the class. then later during economics tutorial (the teacher didn't come, hurrah!) we surprised him with the cake we ordered. from the look on his face i could really tell he was touched. gonna miss him when he leaves for canada next month 'cause he's such a good friend to have and a fun person to hang around with.
after school we went down to venezia's for ice-cream. reminds me of the time where we had to run through the rain just get there and by the time we did, we were all soaked. but still had ice-cream in the end. it really helped to build class spirit, as kangqi said. this time it was slightly drizzling too. anyway halfway i got really tired and irritated by him so i just took a nap. i'm seriously gonna need a lot of help restraining myself.
after school on friday we went down to seoul garden at taka for dinner. kangqi and i finished the entire tray of beef at the buffet counter and felt really sick after that. haha. come to think about it now, it's really funny. we went to the buffet counter and kangqi scooped this really big pile of meat onto a plate and said that it was his. and so since there wasn't much left on the tray, i took the remaininder and put it on my plate. so we walked back to our table with 2 big plates of meat. and damn, we finished everything. haha. how, we don't know. we just did. and what's more, kangqi didn't eat much vegetables and i ate only a bit. so we were saying that we didn't think we'd be in school on monday. =D after that we had an ice-cream eating competition (which i let him win =P), and then the guys sat around talking about stuff. not forgetting everyone spending the whole night taking pictures of nick and yuqing. =)
thoughts are swarming my head again.
1) yuxian, huijuan, yuqing, chris, huichun, kangqi, and maybe edwin, will be leaving nj. S09 won't be what it used to be. hopefully we'll spend the remaining 1 week together well.
2) seems to me that you're only nice to me when you need me.
3) i don't want to be left behind while everyone else is soaring ahead.
4) 2 months to 3 years.
5) deterioration?
6) emotionless sentences.
7) i always make the wrong choices.
8) why should i care, when you don't give a fuck?
9) the very worst part of you is me.
gerard-andrew did a drumroll on 3/07/2004 01:11:00 am
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