In just over two weeks we will be headed to Ethiopia. My husband and my two children here will get to meet my daughter there. However, my excitement over seeing my daughter is clouded by the reality that in just a few days from now if certain paperwork is still incomplete we will not be bringing her home with us.
I ask that you pray for my daughter's paperwork. I ask that you pray for a miracle.
Thursday, May 1, 2014
Monday, March 10, 2014
What to say....
I know it has been a long time since I wrote anything about what is going on with Our Girl. I'm not sure exactly how much to share in such an open forum as a blog. We still have so many things undecided, but we need prayer. So, I feel the need to share at least some of the struggles as of late, in the hopes that you will pray for us.
We are at a point in the process where we need certain paperwork to be completed. Nothing can move forward without this paperwork. If I were to describe the paperwork (at least as I understand it) you would be like "I don't get it. Why would that be the hang up?"and yet here we are and it is indeed the hang up in us moving forward.
Once we have the above mentioned paperwork, our understanding is that the next two sets of paperwork will be relatively simple. There is hope that based on our current direction in our situation we might have her home this summer. In fact, that hope was so bright a month ago, that we purchased plane tickets.
In May, Jeff, Abi, Eli and I will accompany four of the college students from my university to Ethiopia on a mission trip. The time my family will stay will be spent at Our Girl's orphanage. It continues to be our hope that when we leave to return to the United States, Our Girl will be on that plane with us.
So, you might be thinking this all sounds pretty good, what's with all the drama at the beginning about prayer? Well, the kicker is this... we have been waiting on this paperwork for over two months and I feel more and more discouraged every day. I have started to doubt that we will get to bring her home in May.
If we cannot get her here then it will mean an extra trip for me to ET when she does get through the process. This means extra jet lag and extra expense. But even worse it means leaving Ethiopia again without my daughter. When I did it last summer it nearly broke my heart to see her tears. I don't know how I can do that again. I cannot fathom seeing her there and leaving her. And this time I will be ripping away from Her, Her entire US family. It's unthinkable.
Please pray for this paperwork. It is so important that it be done soon. To be honest my emotional stability is kind of spotty right now. I need this. More importantly She needs this.
We are at a point in the process where we need certain paperwork to be completed. Nothing can move forward without this paperwork. If I were to describe the paperwork (at least as I understand it) you would be like "I don't get it. Why would that be the hang up?"and yet here we are and it is indeed the hang up in us moving forward.
Once we have the above mentioned paperwork, our understanding is that the next two sets of paperwork will be relatively simple. There is hope that based on our current direction in our situation we might have her home this summer. In fact, that hope was so bright a month ago, that we purchased plane tickets.
In May, Jeff, Abi, Eli and I will accompany four of the college students from my university to Ethiopia on a mission trip. The time my family will stay will be spent at Our Girl's orphanage. It continues to be our hope that when we leave to return to the United States, Our Girl will be on that plane with us.
So, you might be thinking this all sounds pretty good, what's with all the drama at the beginning about prayer? Well, the kicker is this... we have been waiting on this paperwork for over two months and I feel more and more discouraged every day. I have started to doubt that we will get to bring her home in May.
If we cannot get her here then it will mean an extra trip for me to ET when she does get through the process. This means extra jet lag and extra expense. But even worse it means leaving Ethiopia again without my daughter. When I did it last summer it nearly broke my heart to see her tears. I don't know how I can do that again. I cannot fathom seeing her there and leaving her. And this time I will be ripping away from Her, Her entire US family. It's unthinkable.
Please pray for this paperwork. It is so important that it be done soon. To be honest my emotional stability is kind of spotty right now. I need this. More importantly She needs this.
Monday, December 30, 2013
#17 A New Threat
I have a daughter halfway around the world. If you read this blog at all... you know that. FB has blown up over the past several days with fear over the threat of Ethiopian adoption stopping entirely. As you guessed, if this happens, it will affect Our Girl as well as thousands of other orphans and the families who are waiting to bring them home. Any such threat is very real and praying I am, have no doubt. However, I cannot explain it, but I am not panicking. Praying? Yes. Concerned? Yes. But I hold out faith that my God is till in control. He will bring to completion what he has begun in our family and the life of Our Girl. He alone. I heard the song "Whom Shall I Fear?" by Chris Tomlin on the radio last night and was in tears. I am claiming this song for Her and for all the others waiting both here and there. Please pray with me for Jennifer & Jamaal Jackson, JoLynn Coleman, Joely & Jason O'Neal, Heather Beers, their families and their children in Ethiopia. Will you join us for prayer and fasting Jan 1-3 (or a portion thereof)? God is almighty, and He loves them more than we do. The treat is real and it's BIG but my God Is BIGGER! Pray, fast, true, and put your faith in a BIG GOD! Thank you all.
If you have adopted from Ethiopia (or know someone who has), please send your (or ask them to send their) positive Ethiopian adoption story to pasaddis@state.gov as well as contact local and state representatives.
Below is my letter that I send to the Ethiopian Embassy tonight.
To Whom It May Concern:
If you have adopted from Ethiopia (or know someone who has), please send your (or ask them to send their) positive Ethiopian adoption story to pasaddis@state.gov as well as contact local and state representatives.
Below is my letter that I send to the Ethiopian Embassy tonight.
To Whom It May Concern:
My name is Krista Hands, I am married and the mother of two
children. Our biological daughter,
Abigail is 9 years old and our Ethiopian adopted son, Elias, is 6 years
old. Our family has a heart for adoption
and for Ethiopia.
We adopted our son Eli when he was 10 months old. He had hydrocephalus when we brought him
home. Under the care of doctors he is
now a normal, healthy boy who makes us laugh all the time. He is creative and imaginative as well as
musical, artistic and smart. He is in
kindergarten and is thriving.
When we went to Ethiopia to bring our son home we knew we
would never be the same. The Ethiopian
people, culture and county captured our hearts.
About a year and a half after bringing our son home the university I had
just begun working for started organizing mission trips for the following
summer. I felt led to talk with the
Global Outreach office and we organized a trip the following summer – in 2011 –
to Ethiopia. I brought with me 5 college
students. The same trip with 5 others
was repeated in 2012 and then again with 5 more in 2013. This trip is scheduled this year with 6 more
planning to come.
We have worked with local orphanages and outreach
organizations bettering the community on each visit, including churches and
daycares as well. It has been a blessing
to our students, each of which comes home changed with a love for Ethiopia that
they then share with their family and friends.
That is how Ethiopia is – it changes people.
We have a local organization where we live as well that
promotes Ethiopian culture. We have
several families we know and see regularly with Ethiopian children. Our son clearly knows where he is from and
cannot wait to return to the country where he was born.
During my mission trip to Ethiopia in 2012 I met an older
child that I felt drawn to at the orphanage.
We talked with the director and found she was a double orphan. She touched our hearts and we knew that there
was room for her in our home and that she deserved the love of a mother and
father. We began the process to adopt
her in March 2013. She is already a part
of our lives as we are sponsoring her at her orphanage. Our children love her as their sister and we
await paperwork in Ethiopia to make things official.
We strongly support reform of adoption law and would never
want to see a parent coerced to give up their child. But to stop international adoption entirely
will end the hope of children like the teenager we are trying to adopt of every
having a family, of ever being cared for by parents who love her. She deserves a home, just as all children
do. She deserves to be loved and
protected, to be a child.
We believe that God has led us to Ethiopia and continued to
lead me back year after year. We have a
love for the people of this country and we want what is best for Ethiopia and
for all her children.
We understand the need for upstanding practices and careful
monitoring of adoptions, but we beg you not to eliminate international
adoption. We beg you, on behalf of those
children without families, to allow those with room in their homes and love in
their hearts to bring these children with no other options into families. These families who will raise them to know
and understand their culture, to grow up with parents who support them to make
a difference in the world and in particular the country they came from.
I cannot imagine our family without our son. He is a pure joy and the light of our
lives. We also cannot imagine our family
without the addition of the daughter we are in the process of adopting. We believe God has called us to bring her
into our home. We love her as our own
already as I have spent time with her on two separate trips to Ethiopia over
the past year and a half.
I ask that you find a way to reform without the elimination
of the adoption option. We love Ethiopia
and we are blessed to be a part of this process.
Sincerely,
Krista Hands
Newalla, Oklahoma
Monday, October 7, 2013
#16 Will it ever end?
Some days I do better than others waiting. Then some days it feels like life just stands still. It seems that everyone else's life is moving forward and we're stuck. If it weren't for Abi and Eli I think I'd be stir-crazy for sure. But there is something, or rather someone, missing. Nothing feels quite complete like before. Now there is an ever present ache inside me that says... yes wonderful, but somehow I'm not all here. Part of me is eons away, in an orphanage in Ethiopia. Yes, part of me is not here.
While I could try to recreate for you the past 3 months, I have decided not to. Instead I am going to update you on where we are now and what's next without rehashing all the ups and downs of the past three months - suffices to say that it feels like more downs than ups due, in great part to new regulations (don't you just love government involvement in your life?) on the adoption front.
So, here's where we stand. All of our paperwork is completed and is sitting in Colorado with our adoption agency(been sitting there for 2 months now). There it sits waiting on a PAIR (pre-adoption immigration requirement) letter. This is the new piece of paperwork the government now requires. So, how do we get said paperwork? I'm so glad you asked (actually I'm not glad at all I'd rather the new process not exist, but alas here we are...). So, in Ethiopia our agency is working to gather all of Our Girl's paperwork. They are currently waiting on paperwork from Our Girl's sister. I'm not sure that is the final part of it or anything but we just know they are waiting on that piece at the present. When that piece (and whatever else needs to be acquired) are in hand, they will submit her paperwork to the U.S. Embassy in Ethiopia. The Embassy will go over all of her paperwork, deciding on whether she is adoptable and appropriate to be matched with us. Then they will send the same documents to USCIS (United States Citizenship and Immigration Services) for them to do the same thing again (because if once is good, twice is better). Once they have signed off on the paperwork, they will provide the PAIR letter that accompanies our dossier (paperwork sitting in Colorado).
Once that coveted letter is with our paperwork, it will all go to Washington D.C. to be authenticated, then over to Ethiopia to be translated. After that we will be assigned a court date. At this point, it is our plan for Jeff, Abi, Eli and myself to all travel to Ethiopia for court. After the court date. Our Girl will be legally Ours. Then we return to the US to await our Embassy appointment date. Once that takes place, I will travel back to Ethiopia to bring her home.
In some sense it feels like it did when I was working on my PhD... the end sounds so good and yet like it will never arrive. I ache to be there. My heart hurts to be here with a child so very far away. I love talking about her and about how God has brought us to this point, but it is also difficult to do so. You see when you ask, it is a double edged sword... I know you care (which I desperately need to hear) but it causes me to have to admit that we are no closer than the last time you asked, and that is hard to verbalize.
When? Our agency won't even speculate. I typically tell people, "maybe next summer?" but I don't really know. The earliest possible timetable would look something like this (her paperwork is finished in Oct, PAIR letter arrives in January, court date in February, Embassy appointment and homecoming in April). But the reality is I dare not hope for the best. Don't misunderstand... I WANT IT... but nothing about this adoption has gone fast, so why would it now? I simply have to trust that God has it in his hands and He will bring her home at the right time. Why is that time not now? I don't know, but He does.
So, for now I will keep loving her from afar, sending FB messages through another of the children in her Orphanage, sending care packages through others traveling to her Orphanage, sending letters via snail mail, and praying for her multiple times a day. I also keep in mind that every day is one day closer. I may not know the exact day, but I do know I am closer today than I was yesterday. And for now it's enough... it has to be.
While I could try to recreate for you the past 3 months, I have decided not to. Instead I am going to update you on where we are now and what's next without rehashing all the ups and downs of the past three months - suffices to say that it feels like more downs than ups due, in great part to new regulations (don't you just love government involvement in your life?) on the adoption front.
So, here's where we stand. All of our paperwork is completed and is sitting in Colorado with our adoption agency(been sitting there for 2 months now). There it sits waiting on a PAIR (pre-adoption immigration requirement) letter. This is the new piece of paperwork the government now requires. So, how do we get said paperwork? I'm so glad you asked (actually I'm not glad at all I'd rather the new process not exist, but alas here we are...). So, in Ethiopia our agency is working to gather all of Our Girl's paperwork. They are currently waiting on paperwork from Our Girl's sister. I'm not sure that is the final part of it or anything but we just know they are waiting on that piece at the present. When that piece (and whatever else needs to be acquired) are in hand, they will submit her paperwork to the U.S. Embassy in Ethiopia. The Embassy will go over all of her paperwork, deciding on whether she is adoptable and appropriate to be matched with us. Then they will send the same documents to USCIS (United States Citizenship and Immigration Services) for them to do the same thing again (because if once is good, twice is better). Once they have signed off on the paperwork, they will provide the PAIR letter that accompanies our dossier (paperwork sitting in Colorado).
Once that coveted letter is with our paperwork, it will all go to Washington D.C. to be authenticated, then over to Ethiopia to be translated. After that we will be assigned a court date. At this point, it is our plan for Jeff, Abi, Eli and myself to all travel to Ethiopia for court. After the court date. Our Girl will be legally Ours. Then we return to the US to await our Embassy appointment date. Once that takes place, I will travel back to Ethiopia to bring her home.
In some sense it feels like it did when I was working on my PhD... the end sounds so good and yet like it will never arrive. I ache to be there. My heart hurts to be here with a child so very far away. I love talking about her and about how God has brought us to this point, but it is also difficult to do so. You see when you ask, it is a double edged sword... I know you care (which I desperately need to hear) but it causes me to have to admit that we are no closer than the last time you asked, and that is hard to verbalize.
When? Our agency won't even speculate. I typically tell people, "maybe next summer?" but I don't really know. The earliest possible timetable would look something like this (her paperwork is finished in Oct, PAIR letter arrives in January, court date in February, Embassy appointment and homecoming in April). But the reality is I dare not hope for the best. Don't misunderstand... I WANT IT... but nothing about this adoption has gone fast, so why would it now? I simply have to trust that God has it in his hands and He will bring her home at the right time. Why is that time not now? I don't know, but He does.
So, for now I will keep loving her from afar, sending FB messages through another of the children in her Orphanage, sending care packages through others traveling to her Orphanage, sending letters via snail mail, and praying for her multiple times a day. I also keep in mind that every day is one day closer. I may not know the exact day, but I do know I am closer today than I was yesterday. And for now it's enough... it has to be.
Monday, September 30, 2013
#15 Trip Reflections (part 4)
First, I need to apologize for not finishing my story sooner. At first it was almost in a desire not to... that is my heart wanted to stay there and by not finishing my story in some sense I could stay there. But then as the days passed, life interrupted and got ever so busy with school starting back (remember I'm a teacher). But alas, you deserve the rest of the story, even if the details are somewhat fuzzy now in my mind and I end up abbreviating some of what happened. So, here goes...
The next day was Saturday and we began our day by visiting the bazaar at a local church. There are lots of hand-made crafts and foods, all benefiting local craftsmen. It was a pure pleasure to get to be there and I accomplished nearly all my shopping for my trip. The rest of the team enjoyed themselves as well.
Around lunchtime we headed out toward the Orphanage, with our luggage in tow! We had retrieved it from the airport the evening before and we (the four of us who had our luggage delayed) were SO thankful to have clean clothes, all our toiletries and supplies. Our first stop was at the hotel, to drop off luggage, then it was on to the Orphanage. Much of the rest of Saturday was like Friday. It was a shear blessing to get to be with the kids, but especially to be with my daughter. She is remarkable, She is amazing, and She is Mine by the grace of God.
The next day was Sunday and we attended the church that our kids from the Orphanage attend in the town. It was a beautiful service. They had each of us get up and introduce ourselves. We were also able to take pictures. Watching true worship, worship we couldn't even understand was humbling. These kids... they LOVE GOD.
We were able to have lunch that day with the director of the Orphanage and we were able to bring my daughter with us to lunch as well. The afternoon was spent back at the Orphanage enjoying the kids. I think it was also that day when the team discovered the love the kids have for dancing and their recognition of many pop culture songs from America... so out came the IPhones with speakers and a dance party ensued! So. Much. Fun!
Monday was another beautiful day at the Orphanage, but the day was tainted by the fact that this was the last day. Tuesday we would stop back by only briefly to collect empty luggage and say our final good-byes. Yes, Monday was hard. We had a prayer time with the kids before we left that evening. But even harder was Tuesday.
On Tuesday I had to leave my daughter at an orphanage and later day evening fly out of the country. How do you do that? I mean ... what mother leaves her child half-way around the world with no idea when she will return? She was in tears. I was in tears. This was hard. Too hard. Even now I cling to the promise from My God that I will return and there will be a day when she will come home.
My trip home was uneventful, well almost anyway. There was confusion initially at the airport when I got there about my arrival flight canceling out my return flight. But by the time I was actually there at the airport I was emotionally done. All I wanted was to be home with Abi, Eli and Jeff. Well, that's not quite true, but it was all I knew that I could actually have happen at the moment. Thankfully the airline was able to get things straightened out. I had a 7 hour layover in Turkey but otherwise things went well. I slept a lot on the plane and I read a lot. I was on my way home.
I will update you on all that has happened since I returned home nearly 3 months ago in my next post. I will do my best for that post not to be too far in the future as well.
Having your heart on two different continents is so hard, and so much harder the longer we go. I ache to return to Ethiopia. I try not to dwell on it too much, again another reason not to update my blog. It's too painful to think on for too long. I know I must trust God. He has brought us to this point and only He can bring her home.
The next day was Saturday and we began our day by visiting the bazaar at a local church. There are lots of hand-made crafts and foods, all benefiting local craftsmen. It was a pure pleasure to get to be there and I accomplished nearly all my shopping for my trip. The rest of the team enjoyed themselves as well.
Around lunchtime we headed out toward the Orphanage, with our luggage in tow! We had retrieved it from the airport the evening before and we (the four of us who had our luggage delayed) were SO thankful to have clean clothes, all our toiletries and supplies. Our first stop was at the hotel, to drop off luggage, then it was on to the Orphanage. Much of the rest of Saturday was like Friday. It was a shear blessing to get to be with the kids, but especially to be with my daughter. She is remarkable, She is amazing, and She is Mine by the grace of God.
The next day was Sunday and we attended the church that our kids from the Orphanage attend in the town. It was a beautiful service. They had each of us get up and introduce ourselves. We were also able to take pictures. Watching true worship, worship we couldn't even understand was humbling. These kids... they LOVE GOD.
We were able to have lunch that day with the director of the Orphanage and we were able to bring my daughter with us to lunch as well. The afternoon was spent back at the Orphanage enjoying the kids. I think it was also that day when the team discovered the love the kids have for dancing and their recognition of many pop culture songs from America... so out came the IPhones with speakers and a dance party ensued! So. Much. Fun!
Monday was another beautiful day at the Orphanage, but the day was tainted by the fact that this was the last day. Tuesday we would stop back by only briefly to collect empty luggage and say our final good-byes. Yes, Monday was hard. We had a prayer time with the kids before we left that evening. But even harder was Tuesday.
On Tuesday I had to leave my daughter at an orphanage and later day evening fly out of the country. How do you do that? I mean ... what mother leaves her child half-way around the world with no idea when she will return? She was in tears. I was in tears. This was hard. Too hard. Even now I cling to the promise from My God that I will return and there will be a day when she will come home.
My trip home was uneventful, well almost anyway. There was confusion initially at the airport when I got there about my arrival flight canceling out my return flight. But by the time I was actually there at the airport I was emotionally done. All I wanted was to be home with Abi, Eli and Jeff. Well, that's not quite true, but it was all I knew that I could actually have happen at the moment. Thankfully the airline was able to get things straightened out. I had a 7 hour layover in Turkey but otherwise things went well. I slept a lot on the plane and I read a lot. I was on my way home.
I will update you on all that has happened since I returned home nearly 3 months ago in my next post. I will do my best for that post not to be too far in the future as well.
Having your heart on two different continents is so hard, and so much harder the longer we go. I ache to return to Ethiopia. I try not to dwell on it too much, again another reason not to update my blog. It's too painful to think on for too long. I know I must trust God. He has brought us to this point and only He can bring her home.
Saturday, July 13, 2013
#14 Trip Reflections (part 3)
We decided to try to
leave the guest house by 8:30 on Friday morning. Our driver was supposed to be there for us
and we were headed to the Orphanage. I
was READY! Well, to be honest
emotionally I was ready but well… the morning did not work out as planned.
In the guest house there are several rooms, each sleeping different numbers of guests. My room could hold up to four guests, but I was the only one in my room and my room shared a bathroom with two other rooms on my floor. The four girls shared a room with its own attached bathroom. Then the one guy on the trip had his own room with a shared bathroom, though I think he was the only one in a room using that bathroom during the time I was there.
We planned to eat breakfast at 8:00, so at 7:20 I was up and in the bathroom. When I got in there I locked the door and put my things down only to realize that I had left my towel in the bedroom. So, I attempted to go back to get the towel. Key word? Attempted. Herein lies the problem. As I attempted to unlock the door, the door remained locked. Panic rose up in me. So I brushed my teeth and tried again. No luck. I went to the bathroom and tried again. No luck. I tried and tried ‘til my hand was sore. The door remained locked. And I wasn’t sure what to do. The only thing I could thing to do is what I did, I started banging on the door. After a couple minutes another guest on the floor with me (thank goodness they were still in their rooms) heard me and came out. He went to get the guest house host. I slid the key under the door (the key is used to lock & unlock the door both from the inside and outside). But it did not work on the outside either. I was stuck.
I sat on the side of the tub. I just shook my head and smiled – only to keep from tearing up. The three on the team who were stuck with me in Chicago had joked about us being “Job” and as I sat there I began to wonder. I prayed too. I prayed for God to open the door. I was moments away (ok probably a couple hours away but you get the idea) from seeing my daughter and I wanted OUT. As I sat there Alayu worked on the door. He ended up first banging out the handle and keyhole area. The door remained locked. Finally after being stuck in the bathroom for 55 minutes he broke the molding on the side of the door and the edge of the door enough that the door finally opened. I thanked him profusely and inwardly promised myself I would not lock another door while I was there. (On a side note another one of the team ended up locked in a bedroom after I left as well. Not sure what it was with those locks…).
Now I had another problem. It was 8:15 and I was not ready nor had I eaten breakfast and the driver was to arrive at 8:30. I rushed over to the girls’ room to shower and did my best to get ready and eat as quickly as possible. At 8:40 we left the guest house. I was relieved.
To the best of my recollection from last year it took about 45 minutes to get from the guest house to the Orphanage. So, that was my expectation. But as time drug on it became clear that 45 minutes was no longer accurate. It felt like traffic was so much worse than last year. I confirmed this fact several days later with a family living in Ethiopia. Apparently there is a lot of road construction going on with a new railway going in and every week more roads seem to be closed down due to the construction. So, yes, it took longer to get there due to the traffic. It took nearly an hour and a half.
The entire trip my mind was consumed with three things. 1) I was looking at scenery for anything familiar. 2) I was going over my Amharic phrases I had learned. And 3) I was playing out the scene I imagined that was about to take place, the scene where I would see my daughter for the first time in over a year. I had so many questions. Would I cry? Would she cry? Would she run out to me? Would it be weird or amazing? And there was the niggling doubt in the back of my mind that kept recurring… what if last year was all in your head? What if she doesn’t want you? What if you imagined it all? I had been pushing this fear aside for a while. I knew it was from the Deceiver. And yet it was there with me even then. During the past year I had placed that fear at the feet of my Redeemer. I asked Him to show me what was true. I believed He had, and I believed She was MINE.
Then. We. Arrived.
We pulled into the Orphanage through the gate. I saw very few kids. As the van came to a stop and we started to get out the kids started coming out, mostly boys at first. They were giving hugs and greeting us. I recognized many of them from last year, though I didn’t remember their names. After what felt like forever something caught my attention, and I turned around. She was standing there, just steps away. It was surreal. The next thing I knew we were hugging and I had lost it, tears falling down my face. Her hair was wet and I realized why she had not been there when we first came through the gate. She was getting ready. She was preparing herself to see, well, me. The team told me afterward that I wasn’t the only one emotional they were too.
The next two hours were overwhelming. I spent nearly all of them with Her in the room she shares with 4 other girls. The first thing she did was paint my nails, purple, a favorite color for both of us. I shared the items that I had brought her that I put in my carry-on. I gave her the ‘H’ necklace my sister-in-law Jaena had so thoughtfully purchased for her. I gave her a card Abi had made and a photo book I had made. I had other things to give her, clothing, art supplies and school supplies but they were in my checked luggage who knows where at that point. We took pictures. We played games. It was priceless time. Time I will treasure forever.
All too soon lunchtime came and we left for a local hotel to have lunch. It was a nice time and the owner came to greet us. He invited us to stay for a coffee ceremony. This is an Ethiopian tradition when guests arrive (or leave). It was very kind of him. Then we asked him about his establishment. He showed us around and an idea crept into our minds. What if we just stayed here, at the hotel, while we were working at the Orphanage? It was less expensive and we would have little to no taxi expense. In addition, we would be able to be with the kids longer since the commute would be so much closer. We were all interested in pursuing the idea as long as 1) our luggage came in that day and 2) we were able to not have to pay (or at least not have to pay all of) the costs for the nights we would be gone from the guest house. With that in our minds we headed back to the Orphanage for the afternoon.
The afternoon was more of what the morning was like, plus soccer and crafts. As was the case last year, my camera, and this time my IPhone, where absconded on several occasions by kids, to return to me with interesting photos. The kids also at some point during our days at the Orphanage found the games on my phone. Temple Run and Fruit Ninja were favorites. The Orphanage also had a coffee ceremony for us, complete with sweet popcorn, another traditional feature of coffee ceremonies. Wonderful memories.
Around 4:00 we received a call from Alayu. The airport had called and our luggage had arrived! We were beyond excited! Around 4:30 we headed out to get back to the airport and then to head to the guest house. At the airport after a bit of time our luggage was located and we headed back to have dinner at the guest house. We also spoke with Alayu who decided to let us out of half the cost of our lodging so we could stay closer to the Orphanage. It was a deal. We called Kassa, the owner of the hotel and made arrangements. The girls would be staying in a bungalow with 2 bedrooms – one with a double bed and one with two twins. I would stay on the couch in the living room. Robbie would have his own separate room. It was set. We’d stay at the guest house that night, then head out to the hotel and Orphanage the next morning.
Then we had dinner that night at Yod Abysinnia, a cultural restaurant with Ethiopian food and dancing presentation. I have been every time I have been to Ethiopia. It is a treat. Of course at this point I love the food J and sometimes the college students don’t share that love. But the experience is still worth it and I wanted to make sure that they had that experience while I was in town. So it was. We headed home before the show was over because we were all still exhausted from our trip there and now also from playing hard all day with the kids.
It was quite the day. So much had happened. Locked in a bathroom, time with my daughter, retrieval of prodigal luggage, a cultural dinner, and new plans for the next three nights – my last three nights. My trip was nearly half over. My heart was already beginning to grieve the separation I knew would be coming in four days.
In the guest house there are several rooms, each sleeping different numbers of guests. My room could hold up to four guests, but I was the only one in my room and my room shared a bathroom with two other rooms on my floor. The four girls shared a room with its own attached bathroom. Then the one guy on the trip had his own room with a shared bathroom, though I think he was the only one in a room using that bathroom during the time I was there.
We planned to eat breakfast at 8:00, so at 7:20 I was up and in the bathroom. When I got in there I locked the door and put my things down only to realize that I had left my towel in the bedroom. So, I attempted to go back to get the towel. Key word? Attempted. Herein lies the problem. As I attempted to unlock the door, the door remained locked. Panic rose up in me. So I brushed my teeth and tried again. No luck. I went to the bathroom and tried again. No luck. I tried and tried ‘til my hand was sore. The door remained locked. And I wasn’t sure what to do. The only thing I could thing to do is what I did, I started banging on the door. After a couple minutes another guest on the floor with me (thank goodness they were still in their rooms) heard me and came out. He went to get the guest house host. I slid the key under the door (the key is used to lock & unlock the door both from the inside and outside). But it did not work on the outside either. I was stuck.
I sat on the side of the tub. I just shook my head and smiled – only to keep from tearing up. The three on the team who were stuck with me in Chicago had joked about us being “Job” and as I sat there I began to wonder. I prayed too. I prayed for God to open the door. I was moments away (ok probably a couple hours away but you get the idea) from seeing my daughter and I wanted OUT. As I sat there Alayu worked on the door. He ended up first banging out the handle and keyhole area. The door remained locked. Finally after being stuck in the bathroom for 55 minutes he broke the molding on the side of the door and the edge of the door enough that the door finally opened. I thanked him profusely and inwardly promised myself I would not lock another door while I was there. (On a side note another one of the team ended up locked in a bedroom after I left as well. Not sure what it was with those locks…).
Now I had another problem. It was 8:15 and I was not ready nor had I eaten breakfast and the driver was to arrive at 8:30. I rushed over to the girls’ room to shower and did my best to get ready and eat as quickly as possible. At 8:40 we left the guest house. I was relieved.
To the best of my recollection from last year it took about 45 minutes to get from the guest house to the Orphanage. So, that was my expectation. But as time drug on it became clear that 45 minutes was no longer accurate. It felt like traffic was so much worse than last year. I confirmed this fact several days later with a family living in Ethiopia. Apparently there is a lot of road construction going on with a new railway going in and every week more roads seem to be closed down due to the construction. So, yes, it took longer to get there due to the traffic. It took nearly an hour and a half.
The entire trip my mind was consumed with three things. 1) I was looking at scenery for anything familiar. 2) I was going over my Amharic phrases I had learned. And 3) I was playing out the scene I imagined that was about to take place, the scene where I would see my daughter for the first time in over a year. I had so many questions. Would I cry? Would she cry? Would she run out to me? Would it be weird or amazing? And there was the niggling doubt in the back of my mind that kept recurring… what if last year was all in your head? What if she doesn’t want you? What if you imagined it all? I had been pushing this fear aside for a while. I knew it was from the Deceiver. And yet it was there with me even then. During the past year I had placed that fear at the feet of my Redeemer. I asked Him to show me what was true. I believed He had, and I believed She was MINE.
Then. We. Arrived.
We pulled into the Orphanage through the gate. I saw very few kids. As the van came to a stop and we started to get out the kids started coming out, mostly boys at first. They were giving hugs and greeting us. I recognized many of them from last year, though I didn’t remember their names. After what felt like forever something caught my attention, and I turned around. She was standing there, just steps away. It was surreal. The next thing I knew we were hugging and I had lost it, tears falling down my face. Her hair was wet and I realized why she had not been there when we first came through the gate. She was getting ready. She was preparing herself to see, well, me. The team told me afterward that I wasn’t the only one emotional they were too.
The next two hours were overwhelming. I spent nearly all of them with Her in the room she shares with 4 other girls. The first thing she did was paint my nails, purple, a favorite color for both of us. I shared the items that I had brought her that I put in my carry-on. I gave her the ‘H’ necklace my sister-in-law Jaena had so thoughtfully purchased for her. I gave her a card Abi had made and a photo book I had made. I had other things to give her, clothing, art supplies and school supplies but they were in my checked luggage who knows where at that point. We took pictures. We played games. It was priceless time. Time I will treasure forever.
All too soon lunchtime came and we left for a local hotel to have lunch. It was a nice time and the owner came to greet us. He invited us to stay for a coffee ceremony. This is an Ethiopian tradition when guests arrive (or leave). It was very kind of him. Then we asked him about his establishment. He showed us around and an idea crept into our minds. What if we just stayed here, at the hotel, while we were working at the Orphanage? It was less expensive and we would have little to no taxi expense. In addition, we would be able to be with the kids longer since the commute would be so much closer. We were all interested in pursuing the idea as long as 1) our luggage came in that day and 2) we were able to not have to pay (or at least not have to pay all of) the costs for the nights we would be gone from the guest house. With that in our minds we headed back to the Orphanage for the afternoon.
The afternoon was more of what the morning was like, plus soccer and crafts. As was the case last year, my camera, and this time my IPhone, where absconded on several occasions by kids, to return to me with interesting photos. The kids also at some point during our days at the Orphanage found the games on my phone. Temple Run and Fruit Ninja were favorites. The Orphanage also had a coffee ceremony for us, complete with sweet popcorn, another traditional feature of coffee ceremonies. Wonderful memories.
Around 4:00 we received a call from Alayu. The airport had called and our luggage had arrived! We were beyond excited! Around 4:30 we headed out to get back to the airport and then to head to the guest house. At the airport after a bit of time our luggage was located and we headed back to have dinner at the guest house. We also spoke with Alayu who decided to let us out of half the cost of our lodging so we could stay closer to the Orphanage. It was a deal. We called Kassa, the owner of the hotel and made arrangements. The girls would be staying in a bungalow with 2 bedrooms – one with a double bed and one with two twins. I would stay on the couch in the living room. Robbie would have his own separate room. It was set. We’d stay at the guest house that night, then head out to the hotel and Orphanage the next morning.
Then we had dinner that night at Yod Abysinnia, a cultural restaurant with Ethiopian food and dancing presentation. I have been every time I have been to Ethiopia. It is a treat. Of course at this point I love the food J and sometimes the college students don’t share that love. But the experience is still worth it and I wanted to make sure that they had that experience while I was in town. So it was. We headed home before the show was over because we were all still exhausted from our trip there and now also from playing hard all day with the kids.
It was quite the day. So much had happened. Locked in a bathroom, time with my daughter, retrieval of prodigal luggage, a cultural dinner, and new plans for the next three nights – my last three nights. My trip was nearly half over. My heart was already beginning to grieve the separation I knew would be coming in four days.
Friday, July 12, 2013
#14 Trip Reflections (part 2)
So I left off as we
finally boarded a plane taking us from Chicago to Istanbul, right? Right.
Okay, so we arrived in Istanbul, had a comfortable layover and then took
our final plane from Istanbul into Addis Ababa, Ethiopia. We arrived about 30 minutes late and it took
us quite a while to get our VISAs. But
we did finally make it out to baggage claim.
Remember those bags that the airline assured us were on the plane? Well,
yea, they weren’t. We waited around
FOREVER trying to get someone to help us on what to do next. Basically we left our names, baggage claim
ticket numbers, and phone number for the guest house with the airport and they
were supposed to call us when our bags arrived.
We were supposed to arrive at midnight and we left the airport (after
VISA and baggage delays) at 2:30.
So if you are keeping track it is Thursday morning and we have now arrived in Ethiopia! We met up with the other two of our team outside the airport and made our way to the new location for the guest house we have stayed in for the past two years. We finally turn into bed around 3:30, planning to be at breakfast at 8:00 the next morning.
The new guest house was nice and it was quite large. However, it was further away from the market than it had been before, nearly too far to reasonably walk (and in fact while I was there we didn’t try to). But once we had driven around a bit I had a pretty good sense of where it was in respect to where the previous location had been. However, the next morning as we were trying to figure out finances we discovered a problem.
The last two years in the previous location we had paid $12 per person per day for lodging and $6 per person per day for meals. Grand total $18 per person per day for room, breakfast, and dinner. Unfortunately the prices had changed and we didn’t know it. The new prices were based on what you were there to do. Since the first week (the time I was there) we were working with another mission organization, our rate was $27 per person per day (total). That is $9 x 6 people = $54 per day more than last year. So, a bit over $300 more total for the 6 days I was there. Then because the team would be working with the church affiliated with the guest house after I left the price for the final 14 days would be $23 per person per day (total). That is $5 x 5 = $25 per day more than last year, which was another $350 more than last year. So our lodging and food would be $650 more than we had planned for. Quite a shock when all you have is the cash you have and getting more cash is difficult if not impossible. But we ran the numbers and we believed we would still be ok. So, we tried not to worry about it.
Back to the adventure now… So, we slept a little, like 4 hours or so and were up and ready to go on Thursday morning. Our host, Alayu called the director for the Orphanage, Fekadu and called a driver for us to head out to the Orphanage. I was anxious beyond anything to see my daughter. Then more discouragement flew at us. We found out we would not be going to the Orphanage that day. We would be headed to the Drop In Center. The Drop In Center is a part of the Orphanage and is located in Addis Ababa (the capital city). Basically the way it works is that kids start out at the Drop In Center on a trial basis. If they have been there long enough to establish themselves as trustworthy, and if there is space, they are moved from this location to the one where Our Girl is currently, which houses far more children and has TONS more space for the kids. Hearing the plans for the day, I. Was. Crushed. I tried not to show it. I knew it would not be helpful for the team or change the situation. I consoled myself with the fact that I had waited 13 months to see Her, I could certainly wait one more day.
So we headed out. The day went well. The team had lots of fun sharing the gospel, sharing songs, doing crafts, and playing in the small courtyard area with the kids. The most fun, however, occurred when the one male on the trip, Robbie, took hold of my English/Amharic book and tried out some of his “skills” with the kids. It was hysterical. The kids had loads of fun trying to teach Robbie how to say different words and phrases. Robbie got better, but mostly he made them laugh as he attempted their language.
Me? I had been practicing certain phrases on the different flights. I was working specifically on the following phrases. “I am your mommy. You are my daughter. Let’s play. See you tomorrow. I missed you. Night, Night. You are so beautiful. You are so special. You are so smart. I will always love you.” Some I had down better than others. I was thankful for the book I had gotten that had a CD with it. Jeff had downloaded the CD to my phone and I was using it on the plane to hear and practice my language skills. I have never been much of a linguist, but this was important and I was going to do my best! I practices some with the kids too.
In the midst of my practicing one of the kids figured out that I was Our Girl’s mom. He praised her. He said “She is so smart! She is 1st in her grade in the entire school.” I also had a chance to talk with Fekadu who also praised her for her hard work in school and for her good behavior. I quizzed Fekadu on Her sister and how he anticipated Her adoption process, well processing. That is I was trying to find out if he anticipated problems. He assured me that he did not expect problems with relinquishment (Her sister will have to go before the courts to relinquish custody of Her before the adoption process is finalized). I was relieved to hear what he had to say. It also turned out that he knew the director of the Adoption Agency in Ethiopia that we are using personally! He also personally knew another of the staff members at the Agency. This made me feel good too, good to know that if/when there were paperwork issues, etc. later maybe them being on a first-name basis would prove helpful.
We ended the day back where we began, at the guest house. But I will say, we were exhausted. The travel and jet lag were really catching up with us. We were also still without our luggage. So, if you are keeping track… this is going into the 4th night (the 3rd night if you don’t count the night aboard the airplane) that the four of us were living out of our carry-ons. The other concern for us was that at this point most of the donations we brought were also still not with us, nor were much of the craft supplies and game supplies. We were starting to be anxious. Anxious about how little clothing we had. Anxious about what we were going to do with the kids without our supplies. And really just anxious that nothing seemed to be going according to plan.
To be honest, however, I was most anxious to get to HER. I cared about my luggage, but more than anything I was ready for Friday to arrive, because I knew that on Friday I would hold my daughter again. On Friday all would be right with the world, well more right anyway. And on Friday I would get to practice my Amharic as I said “You are my daughter; I missed you; and I will always love you.”
So if you are keeping track it is Thursday morning and we have now arrived in Ethiopia! We met up with the other two of our team outside the airport and made our way to the new location for the guest house we have stayed in for the past two years. We finally turn into bed around 3:30, planning to be at breakfast at 8:00 the next morning.
The new guest house was nice and it was quite large. However, it was further away from the market than it had been before, nearly too far to reasonably walk (and in fact while I was there we didn’t try to). But once we had driven around a bit I had a pretty good sense of where it was in respect to where the previous location had been. However, the next morning as we were trying to figure out finances we discovered a problem.
The last two years in the previous location we had paid $12 per person per day for lodging and $6 per person per day for meals. Grand total $18 per person per day for room, breakfast, and dinner. Unfortunately the prices had changed and we didn’t know it. The new prices were based on what you were there to do. Since the first week (the time I was there) we were working with another mission organization, our rate was $27 per person per day (total). That is $9 x 6 people = $54 per day more than last year. So, a bit over $300 more total for the 6 days I was there. Then because the team would be working with the church affiliated with the guest house after I left the price for the final 14 days would be $23 per person per day (total). That is $5 x 5 = $25 per day more than last year, which was another $350 more than last year. So our lodging and food would be $650 more than we had planned for. Quite a shock when all you have is the cash you have and getting more cash is difficult if not impossible. But we ran the numbers and we believed we would still be ok. So, we tried not to worry about it.
Back to the adventure now… So, we slept a little, like 4 hours or so and were up and ready to go on Thursday morning. Our host, Alayu called the director for the Orphanage, Fekadu and called a driver for us to head out to the Orphanage. I was anxious beyond anything to see my daughter. Then more discouragement flew at us. We found out we would not be going to the Orphanage that day. We would be headed to the Drop In Center. The Drop In Center is a part of the Orphanage and is located in Addis Ababa (the capital city). Basically the way it works is that kids start out at the Drop In Center on a trial basis. If they have been there long enough to establish themselves as trustworthy, and if there is space, they are moved from this location to the one where Our Girl is currently, which houses far more children and has TONS more space for the kids. Hearing the plans for the day, I. Was. Crushed. I tried not to show it. I knew it would not be helpful for the team or change the situation. I consoled myself with the fact that I had waited 13 months to see Her, I could certainly wait one more day.
So we headed out. The day went well. The team had lots of fun sharing the gospel, sharing songs, doing crafts, and playing in the small courtyard area with the kids. The most fun, however, occurred when the one male on the trip, Robbie, took hold of my English/Amharic book and tried out some of his “skills” with the kids. It was hysterical. The kids had loads of fun trying to teach Robbie how to say different words and phrases. Robbie got better, but mostly he made them laugh as he attempted their language.
Me? I had been practicing certain phrases on the different flights. I was working specifically on the following phrases. “I am your mommy. You are my daughter. Let’s play. See you tomorrow. I missed you. Night, Night. You are so beautiful. You are so special. You are so smart. I will always love you.” Some I had down better than others. I was thankful for the book I had gotten that had a CD with it. Jeff had downloaded the CD to my phone and I was using it on the plane to hear and practice my language skills. I have never been much of a linguist, but this was important and I was going to do my best! I practices some with the kids too.
In the midst of my practicing one of the kids figured out that I was Our Girl’s mom. He praised her. He said “She is so smart! She is 1st in her grade in the entire school.” I also had a chance to talk with Fekadu who also praised her for her hard work in school and for her good behavior. I quizzed Fekadu on Her sister and how he anticipated Her adoption process, well processing. That is I was trying to find out if he anticipated problems. He assured me that he did not expect problems with relinquishment (Her sister will have to go before the courts to relinquish custody of Her before the adoption process is finalized). I was relieved to hear what he had to say. It also turned out that he knew the director of the Adoption Agency in Ethiopia that we are using personally! He also personally knew another of the staff members at the Agency. This made me feel good too, good to know that if/when there were paperwork issues, etc. later maybe them being on a first-name basis would prove helpful.
We ended the day back where we began, at the guest house. But I will say, we were exhausted. The travel and jet lag were really catching up with us. We were also still without our luggage. So, if you are keeping track… this is going into the 4th night (the 3rd night if you don’t count the night aboard the airplane) that the four of us were living out of our carry-ons. The other concern for us was that at this point most of the donations we brought were also still not with us, nor were much of the craft supplies and game supplies. We were starting to be anxious. Anxious about how little clothing we had. Anxious about what we were going to do with the kids without our supplies. And really just anxious that nothing seemed to be going according to plan.
To be honest, however, I was most anxious to get to HER. I cared about my luggage, but more than anything I was ready for Friday to arrive, because I knew that on Friday I would hold my daughter again. On Friday all would be right with the world, well more right anyway. And on Friday I would get to practice my Amharic as I said “You are my daughter; I missed you; and I will always love you.”
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
