Embracing the change

Today marks my first two days with my new company. I again, as new hire, go through the usual but very helpful stuff called orientation. Introduction to the company’s history and background, to the different process involved in managing its people and business, to the different policies enforce for the benefits of both the company and its employees. One day is not enough to fully orient oneself. A day or two is insufficient to have myself adjusted to the change of the environment, people, process, technology and business.

My previous company has been my comfort zone for quiet a time. Now that I moved out, I feel like I stepped into a different world. Strange! The changes are very obvious.

Sometime yesterday, I told myself to just feel the change and go on with the flow of the environment, be familiar with it because the change will become a part of me eventually. I’m here. This was what I was aiming for; the moving forward; the growing up. Now, I will just have to explore the change, understand, embrace it, and move forward with it while having a positive perspective in mind. This change is for my benefit.

On the lighter side, I am so excited to blog about receiving the gift sent across the miles from Allison. Thanks for Mel hosting the online exchange gift last December. Honestly, I never planned of joining but as if there's someone who coerced me to immediately signed for this activity. Turns out to be fun! Charge to experience. What I got? Two pieces of fashion jewelries: earrings & bracelet, a cosmetic set, a corsage and a journal. I absolutely like the journal, perfect for writing down thoughts. And the color, purple - love it ! Thanks again Allison. The package actually arrived second week of January. But since I addressed it to province, I was only able to check on it this week. Here are the snapshots... opps! the pictures are to follow. I am updating my blog from an internet cafe (I guess this will be the case from now on until my budget allows me to buy my own laptop), seems their USB port is not working :(

I fall in love with Theo again

First of all, Theo is not my boyfriend and there is no intimate strings that attached us. Most importantly, he is not a guy.

Okay, Theo is the fur-headed, the plumpy, the naive "Theodore" of Alvin and the chipmunks. Yes, I've watched Alvin and the Chipmunks: The Squeakquel movie. But I admit, I like the first one better. I like their dialogue, the story, the music, their songs. And I laughed harder in the first movie than this one.

I instantly fell in love with Theodore after watching the first movie. Why did I fall in love with him? Maybe because of his timid and yet thoughtful lines. Or maybe because of his chubby cheeks that I really would like to pinch. The scene where he is requesting to sleep with Dave really appeals me.

"I had a nightmare... can I sleep with you? You won't even know I'm here...." And the next morning, you see him sleeping in Dave's face covering his eyes! (lol)

Switch topic: Today is my last day at office. I am torn between what was and what could be. Monday, I will be taking a different route. Excited. Sad but definitely happy for the change.

Life has great options. You don't always have to pick what seems to be the best. Sometimes, the best and the perfect are not always what makes you happy. You may have chosen what seems to be a wrong decision or caught in a not so good situation but at times, it is through them that our lives become better! These lines best describe all the unpleasant things that happened for the previous days. All are blessing in disguise.

A Follow-up Update

This is a follow-up update of my previous post.

Yes, change brings challenges. And it's scary. You cannot just settle to an expectation of what is going to happen. Beyond of my first step is all unknown. It's a risk. And I think what I am doing now is the greatest risk that I have taken in my life so far. I'm afraid and I'm crossing my fingers. At the back of my mind is a little scared voice saying "you've done a wrong decision..."

Two year course.

More than 5 years of extensive experience.

Would the above combined qualifications weigh best than one with a 4-yr course of no or lesser experience?

There is a confusion of my recent job application. The qualification was at least an applicant should possess a degree in computer engineering or any related course. I applied anyway, thinking I've got an experience as a shield. I was thinking it will be up to my employer or headhunter to assess and if they will call me for an interview, it's a chance and I will definitely go for it. The end result. I was considered for the job. Already signed a job offer. Already prepared my pre-employment requirements. I submitted those pertinent papers today. After several hours, I got a call, a verification of my course - is it a degree or JUST a diploma? I said it's a diploma course. Why would I lie about my educational background in the first place?

All the while I thought they know. During interviews, they never asked for my updated resume. I guess they got my resume from Jobstreet, which unfortunately my profile is not completely accomplished. I asked them what will be the problem then. They said nothing, just verifying to settle the mismatch. What will happen next? Will they still consider me knowing my education did not meet the qualifications they've set? I don't know.... what I could do is pray and cross my fingers hoping for their consideration. I know they still have the prerogative to withdraw my contract even though it was already signed. But just in case, I believe my capability will have significant contributions to their company's goal.

The risks: I have few days left in my current company, I am as good as a resigned employee. If my contract is withdrawn, I would end up jobless - for the first time. This would jeopardize my other plans on finances, business and personal. Another scared voice said: "you should have not resigned, not yet." Ahh... what a domino-effect!

Change and Goodbye

Notice the What's New section on my side bar? It's been there for quiet some time now. And I'm glad that I was able to snatch a moment to give further details about what's really going on with me for the past more than a month of I will say a little bit of stuggles in decision-making, career plan and financial management. Did I say a bit? I guess I am just being modest.


If you happen to read my post about my career realization here and here, you will really understand what I've been through.

The last quarter of year 2009, I was hot in pursuing other better job opportunities. What really makes me want to get out of my current shell are probably the same reasons most of you have - growth, challenges and change. After almost four years of staying without an attempt for any job application, the job hunting seems like a new experience to me. It feels like I'm a fresh grad just starting to discover a career except that now I am capable of thinking and expressing myself in a clear and consistent manner plus the fact that I already have experience compared to the one just starting to establish a career.

My struggle was not really in finding the job but in selecting which job I should take on. Early December, I had to think over the two equally better job opportunity knocking at my door. The one offers the technical exposure that I've been wanting for my over five years of doing software testing. While the other offers something different. Though the context is still a software testing, it is more on networks and technical configuration of routers. Both offers growth, challenge and change. Both offer good compensation. However it is the latter that offers better benefits and this really add to my confusion. It was really the first one I was eyeing but when the second offer comes in, I had a change of heart.

What follows was a long sleepless night because I know I had to make a decision come morning. After some pondering moments, I gave up my first choice and opted for the second one. I never thought it would be that hard turning down an offer that is also good plus giving an explanation to a person who in the first place had given me a favor. It was really consuming my mind thinking of best words to say so I won't cause any offenses.

What was next will be my confrontation of myself, the reluctant feeling of leaving and moving on. On my outer self is a composed one, very firm in my decision to pursue career development and challenge. But my inner self is leaning into the emotional side. To think that my almost four long years of stay were spent in a company of people and were consisted of happy thoughts, bonding moments and fun and comfort. I am really at ease if not only for the demands of time and change, I will be glad to stay. I know I have worked with some of most amazing and excellent people; people whom I had a different perception; perception that I realized was wrong once I started working with them; realization that had changed me somehow, professionally better.

Now, I am reluctantly counting the days. I somehow dread my first day of starting on my new company. It's the fright of knowing I will be working with a different set of people whom I didn't know. I will again go through another adjustment phase and I am crossing my fingers my stay with them will also be as best and memorable as my stay with my current company.

To everyone that I have worked with, shared a laugh, sentiments and insights with. To everyone who believed in me. My deepest gratitude are yours.

P.S. I am also crossing my fingers that my new company is not strict in implementing their internet connection policy. I hope I can still continue my blogging in between breaks :)

New Year

January 01, 2010-12:00 a.m - when the dark skies were lighted and flashed with fireworks and the usual night silent were disturbed by the series of firecrackers rushing high into the night sky, I was at peace, by my room's window and by myself, just looking up. I had the tremendous feeling of awe and blissfulness for the things that happened to me within the past one year. I uttered a prayer while humbly holding my heart with a gratitude to God.

A perplex thought had me come up with this question: Why does New Year always comes with a feeling of re-starting your life when actually you'll just have to continue what was left of the previous year?

New Year.

Another journey ended and a new journey has to begin.

A new chapter of life.

A renewed hope.

A fresh start and best time to start anew: career, dreams, plans.

We always look forward to things that we want to accomplished and we hope for the best things to happen. But I think, New Year is not only a mere change of year for most of us. New year comes with a deeper meaning: Change. Change within ourselves.

While I was standing and looking upward, I was thinking, all those rejoicing are nothing but superficial if we don't internalize within ourselves the resolves that we need to have in order to live a more meaningful life ahead.

Best wishes to everyone for the year 2010!!!