Sunday, November 3, 2013

Simple Woman

Find it HERE.

FOR TODAY... 3 Nov 2013

Outside my window... It's dark & cold. Brr.

I am thinking... how nasty and NOT Christ-like some Christians can be. It's appalling.

I am thankful... for the people who love me for who I am

In the kitchen... there's a mess. I wish there was cake.

I am wearing... a nightgown.

I am creating... a (hopefully) peaceful religious path for my children.

I am going... to sleep soon.

I am wondering... why I have to have so many food issues. Again, I just want some cake.

I am reading... Clockwork Prince (It's the 2nd in a series) & Rough Stone Rolling.

I am hoping... that some of my husband's family can put their dislike of me aside and come support my daughter at her baptism. I'm not holding my breath though.

I am looking forward to... celebrating Leah's 8th birthday & my 16th wedding anniversary. After that there is Thanksgiving and my Mom's birthday! I love this season. So much family & so much love!

I am learning... to let go of people that don't add happy things to my life. All relationships are a mixed bag. Even the good ones! But the ones that add no good? Letting go... Radical Self-Respect!

Around the house... There's a load of clothes in the washer. I've washed them 3 times now - Not counting the first time when they went through the dryer with two big fat crayons. It's never coming out. I can't stand to loose that many clothes at once. It makes me feel loopy.

I am pondering... if I should go to bed early. Hannah is sick and I'm afraid I'm getting it.

A favorite quote for today... “Friendship is born at that moment when one person says to another: "What! You too? I thought that no one but myself . . ."”   ― C.S. Lewis, The Four Loves

One of my favorite things... random unexpected affection.

A few plans for the rest of the week: Leah only has school for 2.5 this week. (Parent Teacher Conferences). Hannah doesn't have any because there is voting in her school on Tuesday and then Conferences for her too. I haven't told Hannah she has no school. So I have to come up with some stuff to keep these kids entertained this week. Oy.

A peek into my day... This is actually yesterday. Hannah didn't feel well and was hanging out in our bed. She's on the right there. I just joined instagram so I was trying to find something to take a picture of. lol. I put #busysaturday as the tag. It was a peaceful day.

Saturday, November 2, 2013

Gluten-Free, Corn-Free Crusty French Bread Rolls

I posted this picture on Facebook today because I was eating this roll and thought I might cry in happiness:

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The recipe I used came from this book:


You can click on the book and it will take you to amazon.com to purchase it. Or you can look inside of it there too. I have made several recipes from it now and I feel like I can now highly recommend this book as a whole! There is a recipe in the back for CHEESE NIPS & for GRAHAM CRACKERS. I’m really really excited to make those at some point. There are many other things I’m excited to try too but I’ve never found corn free/wheat free cheese crackers or graham crackers.


For the friends who asked for the recipe (I’m sure this is some kind of copyright infringement lol)…

In the book she has several flour mixes and each of the recipes are based off one of the mixes. These rolls are from the “French Bread/Pizza Mix”.

The following makes 6 cups of the mix. 

    • 3½ cups White Rice Flour (I was running low on white rice flour and had about 2 cups. The other 1½ was brown rice flour.)
    • 2½ cups Tapioca Flour
    • 2 TB Xanthan Gum
    • 2 (1 oz/7 grams) packets Unflavored Gelatin
    • 2 TB Egg Replacer (This link is to the egg replacer I use. There are others. Bob’s Red Mill has one. I’ve seen a few)
    • ¼ cup Sugar (white)

      Just put that all in a baggie (or whatever). Mix it up. Label  it. You can also double it. The 2 TB of xanthan gum & egg replacer doubles to ¼ cup.

      Crusty French Rolls - 6 Rolls (In the parentheses – The second number is the amount if you want to double the recipe – not everything actually doubles)

      Dry Ingredients

      • 1¾ (3½) cups French Bread/Pizza Mix
      • 1 (1) TB Yeast Granules
      • 3 (6) TB Dry Milk Powder or Nondairy Substitute (There’s a brand called “Better Than Milk” that comes in soy, rice, etc – I haven’t tried it but I keep meaning to. Dairy free would be nice too)
      • ½ (1) tsp salt
      • ½ (1) tsp baking powder (make sure it’s corn free!) 
        • FYI: substitute for 1 tsp baking powder (in case you can’t find a corn free baking powder):
          • ¼ tsp baking soda
          • ½ tsp cream of tartar
          • ¼ tsp starch – arrowroot, potato starch (not potato flour), tapioca starch

      Wet Ingredients

      • 2 (4) Egg Whites
      • 1 (2) tsp Dough Enhancer or Vinegar (I use vinegar)
      • 1½ (3) TB Vegetable Oil
      • ⅔ (1⅓) cups warm water (more or less this amount. I had to add some more to get the texture she described)

      Grease 1(2) cookie sheet(s) with vegetable oil spray. Dust with fine cornmeal. (I used millet flour.) 

      In the bowl of a heavy-duty mixer, combine the dry ingredients. Blend gently with the mixer on low. In a bowl, whisk together the egg whites, dough enhancer/vinegar and vegetable oil. Add most of the warm water.

      Add the liquids to the dry ingredients and blend. If the dough is too thick, add more water until the dough seems thick enough that it will spoon out into a roll shape. Turn the mixer to high and beat for 2½ minutes.

      Spoon onto the prepared cookie sheets and form into French roll shape. Cover lightly and let rise in a warm place until double in size (about 35 minutes for rapid rise yeast, 60 or more minutes for regular yeast). Bake in a preheated 425 degree oven for 20-22 minutes.

      Stuff face.

      Okay. It doesn’t say that last bit exactly…

      I’ve typed this up but seriously – buy the book. It’s worth it. You can make pizza crust (obviously), pita bread, bagels, pretzel sticks… Plus there are 4 other flour blends and many more recipes. /*end sales pitch. You’d think I got something for it. lol

      Oh one more thing – I made 8 rolls out of the 6 roll recipe. I know it was supposed to be 6 but I was too lazy to repair the situation. lol.

      I brushed them with butter because I’m a brilliant bad person.

      DELICIOUS. I think I’ll go have another now…

      Tuesday, October 15, 2013

      National Pregnancy & Infant Loss Rememberance Day

      In honor of this day I wanted to write a post. The problem is - I've done it.  So I decided I'm just going to repost.

      This initial post gives it more context though: Miscarriages.







      25 Oct 2011
      Post: Balloons

      This is a place Drew says he used to come to sometimes as a teenager when he wanted to be alone and sit by the river. It’s about 15 miles outside of town.

      Yes, Wyoming already looks like winter. I know you were thinking that… In fact it was pouring rain as we left town and got on the interstate and just as we pulled up to the river it stopped raining. Just a stray rain drop now and then.

      DSCN8214


      This is what 60 balloons looks like in a bunch (that’s a rain drop on the picture).

      DSCN8218



      DSCN8221


      My friend at the store that did the balloons (she’s the floral department manager) put in one “It’s a Girl” balloon and one “It’s a Boy” balloon. I was surprised how right that felt. It was a great idea.

      DSCN8220


      I took the balloons from Drew and held them all at once. He put his arms around me and said a prayer. Then I pulled the balloons more down around me. For just a minute they were all around me and I stood there and cried. Then I started letting them go one at a time.

      DSCN8227


      DSCN8231


      Just as we got back in the car and started to drive away again, it started pouring. It felt like an acknowledgement from Heavenly Father of what we were doing there. It was very sweet.

      I’m amazed at how much better I feel having done that. Lighter some how.

      I ordered the fabric to make the quilt right before we left. I have a poem that’s going to go on the back of it in the corner. I found this image of it the other day…

      Monday, October 7, 2013

      A Life Uncommon

      It was a rough weekend emotionally. I'm a little raw from it.

      So I'm driving along. Taking my girls to the library (we seriously have the best library ever. We stayed for three hours!). And I turn on the CD in my car. It's a Jewel CD that I have had FOREVER. I know every word to every song. And yet somehow this song was all new to me today. So I'm singing along and just started to cry as I drive (almost ran a red light too).

      It's perfect. It spoke to my soul today - which sounds totes dramatic but it really did.




      Lyrics

      Don’t worry mother
      It’ll be alright
      And don’t worry sister
      Say your prayers and sleep tight
      And it’ll be fine
      Lover of mine
      It’ll be just fine

      And lend your voices only
      To sounds of freedom
      No longer lend your strength
      To that which you wish
      To be free from
      Fill your lives
      With love and bravery
      And you shall lead
      A life uncommon

      I’ve heard your anguish
      I’ve heard your hearts cry out
      We are tired, we are weary
      But we aren’t worn out
      Set down your chains
      Until only faith remains
      Set down your chains

      And lend your voices only
      To sounds of freedom
      No longer lend your strength
      To that which you wish
      To be free from
      Fill your lives
      With love and bravery
      And we shall lead
      A life uncommon

      There are plenty of people
      Who pray for peace
      But if praying were enough
      It would’ve come to be
      Let your words enslave no one
      And the heavens will hush themselves
      To hear our voices ring our clear
      With sounds of freedom
      Sounds of freedom

      Come on you unbelievers
      Move out of the way
      There is a new army coming
      And we are armed with faith
      To live, we must give
      To live

      And lend our voices only
      To sounds of freedom
      No longer lend our strength
      To that which we wish
      To be free from
      Fill your lives
      With love and bravery
      And we shall lead...

      And lend our voices only
      To sounds of freedom
      No longer lend our strength
      To that which we wish
      To be free from
      Fill your lives
      With love and bravery
      And we shall lead
      A life uncommon 

      ***
      I started to bold the parts that spoke to me but it was almost all bold so I gave up.

      So my fellow MoFems especially - we've had a hard weekend. I hope this soothes your soul in the same way it soothed my own. My love to you!

      Friday, October 4, 2013

      What I think...

      If you're not interested in Mormon politics and religious establishment inner workings... you might want to skip this post. lol

      What I think about Ordain Women:

      I'd actually really love to eloquently tell you what I think but I'm still studying. I didn't become aware of this movement soon enough to have fallen firmly on one side or the other. I am doing my duty and diligently studying the issue.

      I believe as LDS people this is, in fact, our duty. We are supposed to study issues, learn what we can, study it out in our minds, and THEN pray about it.

      I have gotten this far - I absolutely - without doubt - support their right to do what they are currently doing. If you study church history there are many examples of change within the church coming "from the bottom up". In fact, all through all kinds of history, change nearly always comes from the bottom.That's fairly common knowledge.

      What I cannot understand is the nasty vehemence that is literally being spewed at this group and at anyone who supports them. I am truly baffled by this. Do these people belong to the same church I do??? I just can't wrap my mind around telling someone to "just deal with it" or "why don't you just leave the church?" Leave the church? Really?

      So. In a gospel where we preach that we are brothers and sisters, that we are all children of God, that our singular purpose is to make our way back to our Father in Heaven, to help each other on that path and live together forever.... an acceptable reaction is "just leave the church?"

      To me the idea is to study and to learn where people are coming from. If you love someone and you believe in this gospel - you meet them where they are. You find a way to bridge the gap between you. You do NOT eject them. You do NOT reject that.

      Ugh. I have to stop talking about that part. I'm getting so mad.

      I will tell you some things I absolutely believe - Our church needs to make some changes. Women have more purpose than to make babies (aka more members of the church) and bring each other bread. We have more purpose than the roles we are given right now.

      Here is a post my sister wrote for Rational Faiths: If the Sisters Should Have Faith to Heal... I love it because she references quotes and factual information. And those things absolutely back up the following change list.

      I like the changes suggested here:
      • Encourage partnership in marriage and eliminate the idea that husbands preside over their wives.

      • Create parity in the Young Women and Young Men organizations through equivalent budgets, educational programs (leadership, career, and spiritual training,) and activities (sports, service, and outdoor events).

      • Balance the stories and images of boys and men in church publications, talks, and other media with stories and images of girls and women.

      • Invite women in Church leadership positions to speak and pray during General Conference in numbers equal to the participation of men.

      • Encourage leaders to use gender-inclusive language whenever possible.

      • Recognize that girls and boys, women and men are equally responsible for appropriate sexual behavior, and avoid reducing morality to sexuality, and modesty to a preoccupation with women’s and girls’ clothing.

      • Instruct bishops to refrain from asking Church members probing questions about sexual practices and experiences.

      • Call women to perform pastoral counseling, particularly for women and girls who have been sexually abused.

      • Choose a General Relief Society Presidency and General Board that reflect the diversity of viewpoint and circumstance in the Church, and establish frequent meetings between the First Presidency and the General Relief Society Presidency.

      • Include the Stake Relief Society President in Stake Presidency meetings, and appoint women to meet with the High Council.

      • Delegate more expansive supervisory authority to the Stake and Ward Relief Society, Young Women, and Primary presidencies, including approval of personnel, programs, and activities.

      • Include women among stake and ward leaders who hear evidence and offer judgment in Church disciplinary councils.

      • Include the local Relief Society president in all bishopric meetings, and rotate the planning of Sacrament services among the Relief Society president and members of the bishopric.

      • Examine all Church positions to determine whether they can be filled without regard to gender.

      • Appoint women as presidents of Church universities and heads of administrative departments.

      • Expand hiring practices in the Seminaries and Institutes of Religion and within the religion departments at Church universities to provide women the same placement, advancement, and tenure opportunities as men.

      • Call young women as well as young men to serve missions at the same age and for the same length of time, and afford women the same opportunity as men to function as district leaders, zone leaders, and assistants to the president.

      • Lift the prohibition on women's participation in the blessing of their children.

      • Change temple marriage policies so that men and women have equal opportunity to be sealed to their second spouses after they are widowed or divorced.

      • Consider further wording changes to temple ceremonies and ordinances such that both men and women make the same covenants and enjoy the same promises.

      • Recognize women as witnesses for baptisms and marriage sealings.

      • Restore the former institutionally-accepted practice of women giving blessings of healing and comfort.
      So there. I stand behind that list. And I stand behind my sisters who are trying to make the changes - peacefully, correctly, kindly trying to make the changes. They are brave and amazing. Especially in the face of so much unkindness. My thoughts and prayers will be with them as they travel to SLC (from near and from across the ocean!) to stand peacefully outside of the priesthood session. I will be watching. I will be praying. I wish I could be there to lend my support in person!

      I also really love this post: I Am My Sister's Keeper. I say amen to that post. I *am* my Sister's Keeper and they are my sisters.

      And my prayer will include this post: Listen. Please please Listen.

      Wednesday, October 2, 2013

      October!

      I feel a sense of excitement at the beginning of October. From this point forward the year seems to go by so fast! Football season is in full swing. Kids are in school. Life is churning along (unless you work for the government today. That's another story...).

      And the planning is beginning. I love and dread that part. I have Birthday List (Leah) going and Christmas Lists - stockings and presents. The girls and I already went shopping and got all their Halloween costume stuff. They're such fun little girls.

      Although they wanted to choose things from Monster High and I had to put the smack down on that. Ugly and expensive? No.

      I just remembered I forgot to check on my fantasy football team this week. Crap. What if I had Bye Week players on? Oops. *Update - I checked my team. Sure enough there was a bye week player. In comforting news it wouldn't have won me the match to have switched with my benched player. I lost by 6 points. If I'd switched I would have lost by 2.5 points. Lame. Ready for next week now though!

      Anyway - as we were. Yay fall! Bring on the (gluten free, corn free, peanut free) pumpkin treats! Bring on the Halloween to celebrate our love of candy (I'm such a good diabetic!). Bring on the food abundance of Thanksgiving! Bring on the love and joy and fun and family of it all! And then bring on Christmas! The fun joy and excitement of Christmas. I love getting to be at my mom's house for Christmas break. The relaxed feeling of getting to be with people who get me & know me. Wonderful stuff.

      However - feel free to mourn with me about the fact that we have a chance of snow on Friday. Wyoming - Yay? Leah is really excited though. And watching her excitement  about anything is always fun.

      Fall in Wyoming:

      I put "Fall in Wyoming" into google images. This was a result. That's the truth right there.


      Do you love Fall? What are your favorite parts?

      Thursday, September 26, 2013

      Make it stop

      This isn't happening

      Just NO.

      I bought tiny bras today. Definitely not for me. For another girl who lives in my house.

      Save me.


      Monday, September 23, 2013

      Cat Love Problems

      This weekend I was in Pet Smart. In these stores my children suddenly believe we are in a zoo and we must walk the store looking for every animal there is to see.

      I save the corner with the cats for last. Always.

      Why?

      Well, I love cats - really really really love - and I'm always hopeful I can rush the children through the last bit and we won't dwell on the cats.

      If we dwell... I love. And it's very hard for me to walk away.

      So we've made our way around to the cats. I remind the girls not to tap on the glass and immediately the cat in front of me starts rubbing against the glass trying to get me to pet him. Pet Smart doesn't have any way for you to actually touch the cats without asking (Petco does - just FYI) so I couldn't pet him. I start reading his information. Sigh.

      He was FREE. WTH! I start looking around. There are 4 adults cats. They are all black or black and a few patches of white. All adults. FREE.

      Black cats are the hardest to find homes for because people believe some archaic superstitions about the blackness of cats. Stupidity.

      So they're doing a little marketing. Reminding people that black cats are not scary or a curse and giving them away.

      So I stood there looking at these cats. Seeing the markdowns. $10.00 was crossed out and FREE written over it. And I started to cry.

      I'm such a baby. Cry. Cry. Cry.

      No one would adopt them at $10.00!?!? Kick  me in the gut.

      If my children were not both allergic to cats, I would have left with two cats. Without doubt.

      I love my dogs, I really do. But I am definitely a cat person.

      A cat person with cat-allergic children. Oh the irony.

      If you have a home for a cat, go get one. Go in any shelter (or your local Pet Smart and see if they are giving them away for free too!) specifically request a black cat. They'll be pleased and you'll have my undying gratitude. 

      UC Berkley Study: Black cats have bad luck getting adopted

      Saturday, September 21, 2013

      The Spirit of God Dwells Here

      I was thinking earlier about all the elitism I hear at church, out in the world, among all religions, etc. It always makes me ragey and sad. It shouldn't be done. This scripture has come to me over and over again:
      Matthew 18:20 For where two or three are gathered together in my name, there am I in the midst of them.
      Oddly that doesn't seem to mention a specific religion. It doesn't say two or three Mormons. It doesn't say two or three Baptists. Catholics, Methodists, Born Agains, etc. Heck it doesn't even say which name. Heavenly Father, God, Jesus, Eloheim, Allah, El Shaddai, Yahweh, Adonai, Jehovah... (that's all I have off the top of my head lol)

      My idea? Stop assuming your religion has the corner on having God pay attention to them.

      That is all. 

      http://www.patheos.com/blogs/nakedpastor/

      Friday, September 20, 2013

      Picture Day

      Is it okay for me to say I hate picture day?

      It's expensive and the pictures are never as good as I wish because Leah is s shy with new people.

      But if I don't get them Leah is sad because she feels left out. I can't stand that. So I spend the money and get the photos of my shy child. 

      And... I'm going to visit my mom today and Leah won't let us leave early. Stupid picture day :p

      PS Drew took that picture with his phone. Then I messed with it in an editor. Still cuter than  her school pictures usually are.