May 2016 Reset

May is my time for a reset. It's the perfect time, in my opinion.  Sure, the New Year comes with grand schemes of self improvement and new resolutions, but to me, May is all about renewal.  It's Spring. The cold and dark have receded and are replaced by longer, lighter days.  New things are growing.  Blooms that were dormant over the winter show up again.  I love May, and I LOVE to celebrate it with a reset.

I use this month as a way to look at what needs some TLC in my life, and to give that TLC generously.  This has looked very different over the years. I've done a no-spend month to curb excessive consumption and to take a look at want vs. need (and it pads my savings account quite nicely.)  I've quit caffeine for the month.  I've eaten clean.  I've gone to bed before 10 pm every day for the month so I could feel how it felt to be truly rested (I honestly didn't know - I'd been going non-stop for so many years)  The first year I did a May reset, I stood in front of my mirror every morning and evening and paid myself compliments because I realized I needed to learn how to take them graciously. It felt awkward and silly, but it did the trick.  This type of month-long focus really works for me - I develop positive habits or I let go of some negative ones, and I am almost always healthier and happier for it. 

This year, I'm using the month of May to bring myself back around to focusing on a core belief that has been a bit shaky lately:  the belief that most people are doing the best they can.  When I'm out of balance, I watch those around me and I start to feel suspicious and think that people are actively trying to fail or to disappoint me or that they are making mistakes on purpose or out of sheer laziness.  It's judgy and unhealthy and not where I want my head to be or the example I want to set for my daughter.  When I get introspective about it and ask myself whether I really think this is true, I usually find that there is no evidence to support these ideas, and that I'm only making myself paranoid or worried or miserable.  I've noticed myself in this headspace a few more times lately than I am comfortable with, and that bothers me.  A lot.  I knew it was time to pay attention to it.

So here we go...31 days of reminding myself that everyone -myself included - is doing the best they can.  And following that reminder up with another reminder to offer kindness and compassion and respect instead of being judgy and disconnected.  And then following both of those up with an offering of light and love to those who brought me to this point.  Myself included.

It's time for another 12 of 12 post! 

1. What?  Doesn't your man leave for work with a half dozen gold star balloons? No?  How boring for him.
2.  I never have my nails painted, so it was worth documenting.  I liked it, though.  Maybe I'll try to do them more often.
3.  The girl usually does her own hair, but with her dominant hand in a cast, I had to step in and help.
4. It's spring and all my trees are blooming!  I'm delirious with joy (and a little sniffly with allergies.)
5.  Road rash and a splinted left hand.  Results of a spill on her bike a few days ago. And I still think she's the most beautiful kid, ever.
6.  Prepping for a round of meetings at work.
7.  The Girl has the cutest friends.  This is one of them.
8.  I'm always doing laundry.  Eternally.  Forever.
9.  My car was in the stop for over three weeks and I was so excited to get it back!
10.  Kicking back on my patio.  One of my favorite places to be.
11. We had a picnic in Liberty Park to enjoy the gorgeous, sunny April weather. 
12.  My people.  Mi Familia.  I start and end each day with these two, and I could not be more thrilled with that reality.

Life really is sweet, people. I'm enjoying documenting my everyday this way.  It's such a great reminder to look for the little joys. 

Randomness

**Have you jumped on the KonMari bandwagon?  I really like how the method focuses on keeping what "sparks joy."   My problem is that I rarely find clothes that "spark joy" so I keep getting rid of everything and end up with two pairs of jeans and a couple of black tank tops.  Which is sort of a problem, given that I have to get dressed and you know - leave the house- every day.  I read that Mark Zuckerberg has a similar closet situation going on, so I'm just gonna embrace it and keep trying to find stuff that "sparks joy" for me.

**We spent Spring Break in Southern Utah, enjoying Zion National Park and Snow Canyon, and spending an afternoon (and evening) in Las Vegas.  I can't wait to go back, although this time maybe we'll leave the kids at home.

**Speaking of trips and travel, I am thinking dreaming, planning, obsessing about about a vacation in the Florida Keys with my man this fall.  I'm just starting to research it, but it looks like it has all my requirements:  sun, sand, water, delicious food, interesting day trips, active recreation.   Check, check and check.

**I'm wearing my Fitbit again and tracking my water intake.  Trying to hit the gym at least 5 times a week.  Trying to remember to swim at least once a week.  Trying to get up and move at least once an hour.  Trying to get enough sleep.  Trying to eat well.   I've been a slacker in the fitness and health department this Winter (thank you, nastyrespiratoryvirusthatlastedmorethansixweeks) but I'm trying to get back into my old habits. Note the word: Trying. It' a process.

**Spring is my favorite time of year. The sun!  The flowers!  The gorgeous days!  All of this added up makes me a little spazzy - I can't sit still and I end up jumping into a million projects and trying to do all the things, all at once. Which is not a bad thing but is sort of exhausting. 

There is time for this.

I really miss blogging. I miss writing for a forum that is outside of my own head.  I miss working on my photography skills so I can show the images here.  I miss the tumble of words that used to show up for me when I had a regular writing practice.  I miss just being here, showing up at the page, and having an online presence that helps me fully own my story.  I miss it.  Simple as that.  Every day I miss it.

And yet, it's just not been happening for me.
There are so many reasons not to show up here.
I'm busy.
I'm tired.
I have so much work to catch up on. 
The laundry is piling ever higher on my bed, and it may take over the hallway soon.
I have a million emails to return.
My family needs my time and attention.
I really should work out.
I have a slew of errands to run.

All of these are true, yes, and they are all good uses of my time, yes, but what's also true is that I get distracted from these pursuits, too.  I end up thinking I'm going to get all my stuff done and then end up wandering around, trying to decide what color to paint my living room and where to store all the books I just bought.  Really then, nothing gets done and I'm left both creatively unsatisfied and my list of things to do is still left undone.

None of this is really working for me. 

And so I'm showing back up. Again.
I'm committing to capturing the words when they let me know they are waiting. Again.
I'm taking photos with the intention of improving my skills.  Again.
I'm trying to get the words out when they do show up.  Again.

It's one of those never ending battles I'm constantly fighting (maybe we all are) - how to balance motherhood and adulting and my own needs and those of my family with the unbending urge to write and create and make and try and explore.

I'm trying to remind myself that, like everything else, creative pursuits require being made a priority, which means devoting to them the time and attention that they deserve.

But mostly, I'm realizing that, when everything else piles up and I feel like I can't make it happen...

There is time for this.

There is time for this.*


*The phrase "There is time for this" inspired by my lovely and amazing friend Lisa Field. #thereistimeforthis is one of her hashtags and it rings so true for me.  Do you know her? Check her out on instagram @lisafield12.  She's simply divine.

February 12 of 12 - the sick day edition

It was a rough day. The Girl was sick so we were home most of the day, which is usually a recipe for frustration and a little bit of crazy. 

 1. I'm back to one of my favorite breakfasts. Quinoa cooked in coconut milk, with berries and cream. Have you tried it? It's delish.
2. The Girl slept a lot. She finally rolled out of bed around 9:25.
3. I've been trying to read this book for a while. I struggled engaging with the print edition, but I'm finding the audio version a great way to pass the time while I clean or do laundry.
4. The girl woke up asking for Starbucks and I have a hard time refusing a sickie.
5. FaceTime with the nut. My crazy niece is endless entertainment.
6. Mid-afternoon nap for the Girl.
7. While she slept, I cleaned and organized my closet. It always makes me feel better.
8. My sweet neighbor brought me some valentines cookies. I ate them all. By myself. Don't judge me.
9. The Girl had a really rough time catching her breathe following her nap, which left me a little bit freaked out. After she was all well and resting easily, I stood in the shower until I ran the hot water completely out. Stress relief at its best.
10. My sister made us this crazy heart mitten thing. It was the best tacky valentines present ever and we are going to wear it to Costco today just to embarrass the kids.
11. Spent some time in each of these today.
12. As rough of a day as it was today, it ended with these peeps, so I have zero complaints.

This really is one of my favorite ways to capture the everyday memories that are often the most precious.  I'm so happy to be participating again! 

January 12 of 12

I'm playing along this year with one of my best pals, Amy Gretchen, in her 12 of 12 project. I haven't done it for a few years, but it's really a fun way to collect the everyday memories, and I'm excited to document this year in this way.  

1. Riley's outfit of the day. She picks all her own clothes and she can come up with some unique combinations. And I let her because it is not a battle I'm willing to fight.
2. Drop-off at the Girl's school.
3. Working, working, working.  It's what I do.
4. My current favorite mid-morning snack.  Mint tea with hot lemonade (try it before you diss it) and a green apple with salt.
5. Unexpected lunch date with this dude.   He's dreamy.
6. Driving to a meeting. Try not to envy the joy you see on my face.
7. Didn't feel great, and I haven't for a while, so it was time to see my doc.
8. Because I left the clinic earlier than normal, I was able to pick up the Girl earlier than normal, as well. The sunshine was a very welcome addition to the afternoon.
9. I poured myself into the bathtub as soon as I got home. Best self-care for me.
10. Results of aforementioned doc appointment.
11. I watched Obama's last State of the Union address. I think he's been an outstanding president the past 7 years and I'm excited to see how his 8th year in office goes.
12. Wound the night down with the read for February's book club meeting.It's really good!

So, that was fun! 2015 Year in Review

Instead of New Year's resolutions, I have selected a Word of the Year for the past 8 or so years.  It serves as a guiding force for me each year, and I've come to rely on it as a way to really stay focused on what I want for myself at that time.  I usually choose an intense, work-heavy words, selected to help propel me on some of my self-improvement goals.  Words like "build," "stretch" and "move" are examples of past words of the year for me.  Last year, as I was contemplating my word for 2015, I found that I was tired of those heavy, purpose-driven words.   I had spent so many years working and building and stretching and moving, and those actions had served me well, but I was at a place in my life where I really wanted to focus on having fun.  It was as simple as that - I just wanted to have fun.
So I chose that for my year - Fun.
Not play.
Not laugh.
Not enjoy.

Those all seemed too purposeful and too measurable.  I wanted to make having fun a priority.
I chose fun.

So then I proceeded to choose fun all year.   When I needed to choose between two options, I chose the one that would be the most fun.  When I needed some guidance on what to do next, I did whatever was the most fun.  I didn't just run amok for a year, gleefully acting irresponsible blaming it on the word of the year, but instead I kept my basic simple, healthy lifestyle, and after those values were met, I chose fun.    And you know what?  I had a lot of fun.  So much fun.  Heaps of fun. RIDICULOUS amounts of fun.   All year long.  And interestingly enough, I still built.  I still grew.  I still stretched.  I still moved.  I am still an employed adult who meets her obligations and serves as a productive member of society, but since my focus was on fun, it all just felt like FUN!

A few of the Fun highlights from 2015 (this is just a tiny snapshot of the fun times.  There were so many more !)

Grown up girl's trip to Disneyland.  The magic kingdom is even more magical when you are old enough to know that cotton candy, dole whips and the spinniest tea cup are not a good combination. FYI- I am not that old yet, apparently, because I still made myself sick, but I can appreciate the wisdom.

Spring Break in Austin to spend some quality time with one of my all-time favorite people and her girls.  We basically talked and ate non-stop for seven days. It was literally the best possible way I could have spent that time. 


Breezy June weekend in New York City with Arabella, which basically involved finding the best food possible and breaking that quest up by seeing Chicago, hitting up the Met and wandering the city in the rain.  It was amazing!
 

Fall Break in Oregon with the Girl.  We explored tide pools, wandered beach towns, talked and talked and talked as only Riley and I can, spent quality time with one of my favorite people, shopped for funky green shoes and indulged Riley's inner artist.  It was dreamy.

At Riley's request, I dressed up for Halloween (which I never do.) It turned out to be so much FUN!


Christmas Cruise!  Spa time! Whale Watching!  Snorkeling!  Kayaking! Laughing ourselves silly at absolutely nothing!  Definitely one of the most fun ways I have ever spent Christmas!

 One of the reasons that the Word of the Year works so well for me is that I truly believe that what you put your attention towards will thrive.  In my own life, that has been proven to me again and again.  2015 had it's ups and downs, like any year, but by putting my focus on fun, I basically looked like the next photo all year - a little crazy looking but happy, alive and completely enjoying my life and the amazing people and experiences that are part of it. 



It totally works for me.