intimate stories worth sharing

phone pic from last weekends rodeo

i have been frustrated by the media coverage swarming the september eleventh anniversary. it frustrates me that it takes a tsunami, a hurricane, or a terrorist attack to remind us that we are all in this together.

in association with the september eleventh memorial museum, npr is producing a storycorps special recording survivors stories, usually memorializing their lost loved ones, that is worth all the media coverage it can get. their goal is to have a story recorded for every life lost on sepetember 11, 2001.

these intimate stories have a profound impact. last week i heard a fire captain father talking about both his sons who died in the attacks, a 34 year-old police officer and a 36 year-old fire fighter. one of his sons called him on 9/10 as he was headed to work, he told him he loved him before they hung up. the other son called just as the towers were hit, he told him he loved him before they hung up. the father- "not very many people can say that the last words they said to their son or daughter was 'i love you.'"

if your reading this, please know, i love you.

deep in the heart (day three)

me & g

day three found us on the mosaic front steps of my aunt lyn's house for the pomeroy family reunion. as a kid, i always dreamed of having an artsy home like my aunt. i still do. every maxi skirt, watercolor painting, and buddha statue scream her name. there was an iron tree sculpture being installed in the backyard as we left. lyn was decorating it with empty wine bottles from the event to memorialize the day she worked so hard to put together for everyone. there isn't anything nondescript about my aunt either. it must be genetic.

in this family, creative juices flow as freely as the wine. there are artists of every trade- painters, writers, sculptures, graphic designers, musicians, dancers, yogis, landscape architects, and movie producers. our colorful lot spent the hot day enjoying texas barbecue in front of rented industrial fans. we admired tommy's beard, michelle's baby bump, and my long lost cousin's sense of humor.

quote of the night

text message from brian to tiff: your sister, the english major, just asked me how to spell penis.

teacher with a triumphant smile

mr. suggs and students at the nhra motorsports museum

it's hard to believe that it's been a year since brian started teaching autoshop. he survived! and he's going back for more. we took a brake under the shade tree from car washing this afternoon and i asked him some questions. with much eye-rolling, he provided some answers.

me: do you like teaching?
him: it's too early to tell.

me: what was your favorite part of last year?
him: teaching the adults, the ones that really wanted to be there.

me: what was your least favorite part?
him: the bureaucracy (he started saying 'the bull shit' before rephrasing)

me: do you have a favorite moment from last year? (his answer surprised me. i love it when that happens!)
him: when i taught the adult class about personal portfolios. it was all about keeping an updated resume and cataloging certificates. i shared my personal portfolio that got me the teaching job. none of them knew how to do it. they were really into it. it was a valuable tool for them, especially considering half the class needed me to sign unemployment papers verifying that they were attending vocational classes.

me: do you have a least favorite moment?
him: when that stupid kid accused the class of stealing his ipod. he was seriously after me to frisk each and every student until it was found. he wouldn't let up and the school police were busy elsewhere. that was annoying.

me: what will you do differently in your second year?
him: i won't be everybodies friend. i'll be firmer and more structured.

me: what will you do the same in your second year?
him: separate the students into "pit crews" with specific jobs for each crew member when we're working in the shop. head to head competitions between the pit crews worked.

me: any more thoughts on the subject?
him: it's really not as hard as everyone says. (pause) i couldn't have done it without my wife (said with an upturned nose and a triumphant smile)!

deep in the heart (day two)

niece abigail, held by aunt b, hugged by cousin mia

day two was not the day for pictures. it was the day for reconnecting. it was the day for breakfast dates, dinner dates, and margarita dates with women i love. women that can snatch a restaurant check with ninja-like skill- even at subway! at subway, they sneak up on you in line all sweet like. they pretend to be interested in what your up to. and then whamo! your food is bought and paid for and anut b is strutting her casual victorious way out the door.

these women of mine have sensitive hearts the size of their state. they ask you how you are and you answer them honestly. you talk about things that really matter. you trust them with things you don't trust to anyone. day two was full of heart.

(number fourteen)

brian made me take a picture in this ridiculous hat

the empty gravel flower bed has intimidated me for two years. but no more! we planted fourty-seven pretty, (mostly)native, (mostly)drought-resistant somethings in the front (number nine). our dependence on home depot no-interest financing is to blame for shortcoming my environmentally friendly goal.

i wanted something simple and natural that would look at home in our rocky desert area. we placed some medium sized rocks we already had and one big fake one from the hardware store at the front of the bed to form a gentle border. around the rocks we planted mounding flowering plants and various grasses- my favorite. between the plants is a stepping stone walkway leading to nowhere, our very own winchester mystery house. eventually, it will lead to a backyard gate.

the growth in front makes me smile each time i enter or exit the house. it's the only project we've done that looks consistently better in person. mother nature'll trump the camera every time. hands down. no questions asked.

it looked like this before

not so much

mia's first day of first grade work made my day 'totally awesome.' miley's, not so much.

first grade giggles

kindergarten, first grade!

miley filled this morning with first day giggles. there were no jitters. she woke early with a smile. when i got out of the shower, there she was, fully dressed waiting patiently for me to zip up her jumper. not a shabby way to start the school year.

miley was very fortunate to have had such a positive school experience in kindergarten. first grade is looking to be just as promising- her teacher is the amazing mrs. c and all her besties are in her class.

keep on shining giggly girl, i'm so proud of you!

we arrived with three, left with one. next year, we'll be leaving with none!

third grade awe

kindergarten, first, second, third!

this is the first year that the girls will share a recess/lunch/bus schedule (can i get an amen!?). in the car yesterday i overheard them discussing it. it was more mia talking while miley ignored her than a discussion, but none the less, a direct quote is in order: miley, i will play with you one recess a day, but the rest of the time i don't want you all up in my face, okay?

what is so funny about it is that mia would love it if miley were constantly 'all up in her face.' mia loves her family, even in front of an audience (unlike her younger sister who learned embarrassment early).

each year i assemble mia's first day pictures in disbelief, awe at how much she's grown, and cry lucky tears over what a kindhearted (third grade!) girl she has become. this year has been no exception.

wobbly legs

 

i haven't taken a single picture in the last month of anyone, wearing anything, but a swimsuit. this week the suggies have dipped in chlorinated pool water, fresh lake water, and salty beach water. i love it. summer is here people, soak it up!

unfortunately, for many women this time is associated with swimsuit anxiety. not for me, no mam, i am over that garbage. but leave it to my middle monkey to have me doubting my confidence. while swimming with their cousins, miley looked at my sister-in-law, kim (who carries her calories in the same places i do), and casually said 'your legs wobble just like my moms.'

my mom (and my husband) are funny

drunk guy at the resort: heeeey, i like your shades.
laughing gloria in her bright pink sunglasses: you should see my car.

mom and her freshly painted car. look closely and you will see that the new interior matches the bright exterior. mia has affectionately dubbed it the 'lemonsine.' we came home from shopping the other night to a homemade 'taxi' sign atop the car and a laughing brian on the porch swing.

i'm so glad she's such a good sport. i actually think it's pretty cool that she didn't want a 'nondescript' colored car. and i think it's even cooler that she doesn't give a damn about what anyone else thinks about it. there isn't a single nondescript thing about my mother, even though that has the potential to be embarrassing, i wouldn't have her any other way.

giddy-up ya'll

quote image from polyvore via pinterest, family image via my sister's iphone

deep in the heart (day one)

the girls and i kissed our boys good-bye on the curb of lax and made our misty-eyed way toward security. miley and i walked barefoot through the metal detectors without a problem, but the tsa agent said that mia required a full-body scan to make sure she wasn't hiding anything under her hippie skirt. after a long wait, the girls excitedly boarded their first flight in memory.

we were attacked in the dfw baggage claim by an even more excited auntie tweece and crazy grandma. we split up into two rental cars and i attempted to follow my mom to the hotel. i stopped trying to keep up when she drove her pontianc vibe straight through a yellow and black stripped barrier arm. much to her chagrin, when we safely reached the hotel 20 minutes later, my chest was still heaving with laughter.

to the girls delight, john & liz arrived with their babies a few hours later. we set off on another crazy procession, this time three cars thick, in search of food. the joyride ended with me swerving into a parkingspace outside olive garden (lame, i know) cursing the absence of a gps. once inside, my agitation was replaced with the elation of being surrounded by some of my favorite smiling faces.

illegally acquired, universally admired

the short drive from dfw (d-f-dubya) to our dallas hotel quickly revealed a few things. one- navigating the cities highways, turnpikes, spurs, and beltways was going to be problematic. two- texans freaking love texas. the iconic state outline is everywhere: waving on flags, painted on buildings, and placed in flowerbeds. the picture above was taken at my mom's sister's house, but i spied the exact same stepping stone in a garden at my dad's brother's house.

i'm a californian, born and raised, but i've been surrounded by that contagious texas pride my entire life. our orange county home was full of riffles, cowboy boots, and genuine texas bull shit paper weights. my mom channeled her texan resilience into retaining her twangy accent despite living the majority of her years away from 'home.' it worked so well that i still find myself regularly using the word 'ya'll.' which is quite the useful word when you think about it.

we just got back from two family reunions and four days deep in the heart of texas...

miley's 6/12/2011 journal entry

"today i had so much fun with my kuzins. luve miley suggs."

not expected, but appreciated

we are checked boxes and designated numbers. we are pigeonholed. society constantly nails deliciously round individuals into unapologetic square spaces. we take our lives and force them into schedules, educations, jobs, obligations, and blurbs of 140 characters or less that do not accommodate individual talents, needs, or preferences. we are taught to fear the roundness. we're afraid, so we throw out our potential for insurance.

i buy the safety insurance. i tuck my sleepy 5 year-old into a crowded classroom before 7:30 every morning, even though i know in my heart she should be sleeping in the security of her warm bed. a non-square mileyfied education would require a later start, a smaller class, less repetition, and more flexibility. but it would not require a different teacher. no, no, it would not.

public education is nearly impossible to personalize. teachers are given deplorable working conditions and unrealistic expectations. the cards are so stacked against them that i'm afraid to join their ranks. their success always surprises me. i do not expect them to accommodate and embrace all the individuals in their classroom, but i sure as hell appreciate it.

thank you mrs. c.

(a miafied education would involve a lot less boys, but that's a post for another day...)

through mia's eyes

our family is giving, loving, and joyful. this leaf was displayed on the classroom family tree during open house. tears sprang up as soon as she showed it to me. i hope her world always remains so beautiful!

he never saw it coming

three days later and all that remains is some slight swelling, bruising, and bloody boogies

we were driving the family wagon quickly in the direction of grandma & grandpa's house to drop off mia & miley. the girls were sitting stiff in the back, brian sat alone in the front, while i sat nervously next to trouble in the middle. i was cursing the carseat law when he turned his bleeding, swollen face towards me and said 'i won't close my eyes on my big wheel again.'

thirty minutes earlier he had been happily racing his favorite toy down the sidewalk when he went off the curb and into the bumper of my gigantic car. the suberban is tall enough that the big wheel went under it, leaving his little nose to absorb the impact. his nose bled so much, for so long, that we were certain it was broken. and it was.

i'm not sure whose more traumatized- him or his sisters. the girls were on the floor holding each other whaling until we were able to stop the blood. they continue to remind him to be careful when he gets crazy. but of course, he hasn't slowed down. he's a champ and a charmer. each time a different member of the hospital staff asked me what happened, his nasally voice piped up to answer. when he got to the 'eyes closed' part, they all had to stifle laughter.

i agree with tony- the kid needs a helmet cam.

haters gonna hate

from miss miley's unicorn/rainbow party

there were lots of reasons i delivered three babies without drugs, the least of which not being because i was told i couldn't. the haters told me the same thing about this six-layer homemade awesomeness.

the fact that i'm less than 6 months away from 30 and defiance remains such a powerful motivator, is disconcerting.

trying to look up

4/1 race weekend

it has been a melancholy, norah jones couple of days. this weather has me missing last weekend when spf 30 wasn't enough to guard my babies against the desert sun. we celebrated jim & tish's 35th wedding anniversary at last weekend's race. almond champagne, texas bbq, and lots of dirt- everyone was happy.

i'm determined that friday will be happy (thanks manda!). this good news is definitely helping- congrats tiff, you totally had that coming.

youer than you

the girl's school threw a big shin-dig to celebrate dr. seuss' birthday today. the second grade preformed a 'read to kids day' poem at the assembly, so i went to watch miss mia. the pto president spotted me and asked if i could take pictures for the yearbook and read my favorite seuss (mr. brown can moo) to a few classes- hell ya!

i've been trying to figure out what i want to be when i grow up. i keep second guessing teaching. but being in the school environment today, surrounded by all those kids, and all that learning, made me me-er than me. i didn't want to leave.

happy birthday doc- thanks for my favorite quote, all the awesome books, and that fabulous hat.

miley (embarrassed that mom is at school)

mia (excited mom is at school)

kinders

2nd graders

cutest cat ever
(pssst- mandinca, you need to teach special ed!)

why i'm not the favorite

brian & levi skipping rocks at the tide pools

mommy: levi, stop throwing rocks! stop throwing rocks! stop throwing rocks! stop throwing rocks! stop throwing rocks!
daddy: dude, let me show you how this is done.

more weekend photos to follow. promise.

eight is great

last week in school, mia was asked to report on an america hero of her choice. i assumed she would pick her beloved dr. king, but another student had already called dibs on him. so she chose her other favorite civil rights leader, susan b. anthony, who "fought for women's rights!" in addition to being a scientist, a teacher, and an author when she grows up, mia would also like to "change all the unfair laws."

her eight year-old heart is brimming with so much compassion, emotion, and love that it has to suffer the occasional burst. and after a good cry-out, her permanent-toothy smile returns with a vengeance. i'm sad the toothless smile didn't hang around for longer. despite my pleads, these kids just keep on growing.

but i'm enjoying these longer-legged lovlies of mine. being able to do big kid stuff with them is fun. and we're lucky to still enjoy some of the little kid stuff too- mia's still president of our fan club. whenever she sees us after being away for any period of time (school, quick trip to the store, whatever) she still gets a running start before jumping on us with her overzealous hugs. my back doesn't like it, but my heart sure does!

this post is a few days early because we have big plans to celebrate the greatness of eight that don't include being anywhere near a computer. a very happy birthday to my big-hearted bug. i can't wait to celebrate with you!

(psst, tiff- do you remember that day? the day a 2 year-old mia insisted on eating her cereal with a gigantic serving spoon and wearing her jammie shirt atop on her head like a do-rag? and she squeezed herself into miley's walker and made english muffin pizzas for lunch? that was a good day. as good as any waterfall hike for sure.)

a girls weekend

after saying good-bye to the boys friday afternoon, the girls made a list of the things they wanted to do during their special weekend. much to my surprise, we were able to check each and every item off the list. it wasn't very relaxing, but it was very fun. mia & miley took turns texting brian updates throughout the weekend. stuff like "daddy i have flwrs on my tos" or "daddy im having do nuts for lnch." the weekend left me feeling very grateful for my girls.

#15

mio, manda, rina, the captain, the scientist, the conductor, sil

#15 was checked off the list with test-revivalist fervor. seven of us bounded up tahquitz canyon toward it's beautiful waterfall and away from january gloom. it was a morning full of pink bandannas, hiking beads, and friendship bracelets.

miley blazed the trail (of course/again) and asked that we all call her "captain." we did. mia educated us on magma's crucial roll in rock formation and told us that she should be a scientist when she grows up. we agreed. my girlfriends and i followed the captain enjoying photo ops, chatter, and the little personalities in front of us. spending time with adults who enjoy your children as much (if not more) than you do, is really something special.

the reward waiting for us atop the trail was the beautiful waterfall that my pictures do not do justice, there was a palm springs resort waiting for us at the trails end. the little lovelies swam while the larger lovelies lounged poolside with pina coladas, pizza, & red velvet birthday cake. we could have stayed like that forever had the setting desert sun not forced us from our lounge chairs. it's a pity the sun has to set on such glorious days.

happy birthday rina!
i hope you enjoyed it as mush as i did.