我能吗？

我能吗？真的能吗？

今天的生物理学有点打击我的信心。 准备了这么久的一来，感觉是否全都功亏一窥了。。。我承认，我是个完美主义者，如果考试有一部分考得不佳，就会觉的好像所有的预备是费掉。咳。。。心情有点低落。


够了！我发誓过我会尽我全力迈向前进的！我不会因小失大；我不会因为这次可能考不好而气馁！这次失手，还有下一次；下一次失手，还有第三次；再失手，还有第四次。就算失手九千九百九十九次，还有一万次！

我不会放弃自己，因为上帝没有放弃过我！

不， 绝不！ 我可以的！我能的！ 我，是行的！

On Differences

Went to lunch with Polycarp in Pak Li cafe ( the only affordable, edible, decent place in Section 18). Both of us were discussing about the different type of personalities of people we see around us, especially in INTEC itself. It was kinda interesting when we started comparing notes on our observations as well as opinions of the very different type of peoples that we have had the opportunity to cross path with.

And that got me thinking....

The problem in life is not when you're being different from others, it's when you're feeling different with others.

This kinda holds true too, for being alone and loneliness. We tend to associate both together whenever we see a person only being with himself. There's absolutely nothing wrong with being alone, but often, the start of the problem is when you are feeling lonely. You can be in the midst of the crowd and still feel lonely,but you don't have to be lonely when you are alone. Being alone is the state of the environment; loneliness is a state of mind; they are not necessarily related in anyway.

Anyway, back to being different... What does it mean by being different ? To a lot of people, i am a very different person with them, possibly another life form arriving from another planet *chuckles*


but as Polycarp so rightly said, who can define what is normal ?

If being different means loving to be alone and be lost in your own world when others prefer the company of other friends,

If being different means doing what something that you like while others shun it as far as they could,

If being different means talking about philosophy and factual things when others are discussing about computer games, their movie/song idols and the latest gossip one hears,

If being different means staying up late to the wee hours of the morning pouring over books when others are sleeping,

If being different means thinking and perceiving things from views that are normally against the norm of the society,

If being different means aiming high beyond your current abilities and there's a huge possibility you might fail when others prefer to go on the normal route in life,


then i tell you what.. i want to be different !

I want to be different because out of so many hundred and billions of lost souls out there in the world, i want to differentiate myself from others !

I want to be different because i refuse to make my life an apology but a statement for others that no matter how lofty our goals are, as long as we set our eyes un-wavered at the ending zone, success is not impossible, it is inevitable !

I want to be different because i want to sit back and watch my life transform, with the blessings and power of God, from a normal ordinary life to something extraordinary !



Finally, i want be different because that's how i am going to make a difference in the world. Because at the end of everything, beneath all differences of doctrines and discipline,there exist a fundamental agreement of our existence in this world, and that is to make the world a better place for others, for all of us.

One day, we'll all be called home to the Lord. I want to stand in His Light, His Presence and His Glory, staring into his compassionate blue eyes, and said, "Lord, thank you. It has been a good race to the end. I have done my best."


One of the greatest gift that God gave us is our life and our talents, and one of the greatest gift we can return to God is to use the gifts He gave us to the fullest.

离别

咳。。。刚才与Polycarp一起到飞机场去送机。。。眼睁睁望着Kelvin Lee离开。。。咳。。。

你问我，现在的心情如何？

伤心。其实，并不怎么认识他，但是，看着他离别的那一面，就想到我的人生又到了一段落。虽然我们交流不深厚，但他始终是我的朋友，而朋友就是要珍惜的。

你问我，你想回去以前吗？

会。一定会。因为我错过的东西太多了。。。比如没有好好珍惜于朋友的时光，还以为于对方的时间还有很多，很多。

你问我，你会想改变过去吗？

不想。因为我不想改变我所珍惜的回忆=)

保重吧朋友，我只能够默默地祝福你学业猛进，心想事成，愿主蒙福！

No Happiness

It's tiring to go on a routine, doing the same thing day in day out, doing the same thing again and again. Can life get a bit more exciting ? What happened to the days when students used to go out to Sunway karaoke lounge and sing their heart out ? Where are the days when students used to hit the shopping complexes and just hang out there fooling around ? =(

Does life as a student revolves around studying and that it constitutes nothing save this torturing monotony ?

Sometimes my mind do tend to wander there and i do wonder what is it that i am studying for ? Good grades ? To please my parents and teachers ? To show that i am smart ?

But then... when i started to think about the days when i finally get to sit down with my future students together learning from each other, when i started to think about how i am going to share my hopes and dreams, my fears and aspirations with them, when i started to think about how i am going make a difference in their lives, when i started to think about helping them to pursue their goals and dreams... suddenly, i realize that life is not about me, it's about how best i can prepare myself to help others.

Once there was a wave that said, "Sigh, i am going to crash onto the shore and will be no more...Why is life so unfair to me ?"

The wave next to him then said, "Oh.. i am not worried about that, because i know i am part of the ocean."

Sometimes, instead of focuing our energy merely on ourselves, and if we would just open our eyes and see how we fit into the big picture, we'll come to terms of what life is all about.

To me, life is an endless pursuit of helping others in their life so that they can, in turn, do the same unto others. Life is short, what we do in life, strikes a chord in the universe and vibrates for eternity. After that, well, life just doesn't seem too bad after all =)

"There can be no happiness in life, except in the realization that we have accomplished something." ~ Henry Ford

累了

今天帮朋友庆祝送别礼。。。看着朋友们都这么开心，似乎觉得自己有点对他耿耿于怀。。。

看着朋友们这样玩，似乎也觉得自己越来越累了。。不懂还需要这样挺续多久。。累了。。真的累了。。
可是再累，这场战仍然还是要打下去； 这场赛还是要跑完。在向终点卖力奔跑的当儿，我一点会尽心尽力打完它的！我是有能力的！我行的！

God did not give me life and put me here to start a race, but to end one.

I have fought a good fight, I have finished the race, and I have remained faithful.
(2 Timothy 4:7)

一切发生在我身上的都是为了荣耀主！主助我一臂之力吧！

Satisfaction

Well... the week has seems to be coming to a close.. but not without a start of another week of frenzied revision and mad rush for time *frowns*



There's so much i wish to say but somehow, words are just insufficient to express them. One of my friend has left my college and i do miss the time i spend with him.

Exam is coming soon and i am feeling very hectic and tired. Exhaustion can really provoke your mind to think of stupid things. Seeing everyone rushing to study and the feeling of knowing that this trial examination is part of my future does add a lot of weight onto my already burdened shoulders.

But you know, over the previous weeks, i come to realize that this is not my journey alone in the wilderness.. Yesterday night, a friend of mine asked how is it that i can keep on being so persistence and resilient in my studies. I chuckled and that was that.



What people see in me is i myself, but i know it isn't me, it is my friends. Sometimes, when i feel so tensed up and my mind started to go adrift, i can reminiscent upon the time i spend with my friends and i feel so at peace with myself. At times when i feel like life is no longer meaningful, i just think of my friends who are also harboring great dreams and great plans and i feel so motivated once more. At times when i feel like all hope is lost, my friends are just a phone message away.

I don't have a lot of friends like some others but i do have a few close friends with whom i shared the same perspective of life and to me, i think that is one of the greatest blessings in life that i have received.



Now thinking back all these, i finally know why i can't express my gratitude to my friends just now, because words, diminishes their value in my life. With age, i come to realize that it's not about how many people i know, it's about how many true friends i have.

And after everything i think of this, i guess life, despite its whims and pains, it's still beautiful after all XD

Towards The End

Seems like time has flew by ever so fast... let's count the time i have left in INTEC starting from today, shall we ? XD

One study week

Two examination weeks

One week of holidays

Four weeks of revision

Three weeks of study leave

And WHOA!... one a half month worth

of A Level Exam...

*methinks this is way over the line here.. one and a half month.. come on.. just for three subjects ?*

Anyway, tension is mounting and everyone is like a walking corpse with their face glued on books

...and some sleeping on theirs.

Kinda feel motivated by Polycarp and Chris, of whom both i regarded very highly of. Very astounded by their in-satisfiable capacity for knowledge and their persistence plus determination to succeed in their studies. This couldn't come in a better time ! *with exam looming above my head like a sword >.<*

"Nothing in this world cantake the place of persistence. Talent will not; nothing is more common than unsuccessful people with talent. Genius will not; unrewarded genius is almost a proverb. Education will not; the world is full of educated derelicts. Persistence and determination alone are imnipotent" - Calvin Coolidge.

Aim at the sun and you might not reach it;
but the arrow that you shootwill always be higher than
if you had aim towards an object the same level as you

Success comes with a price and it seems to be largely a trade off between something significant in your life. Something i read off from Maxwell,

You pay a price for running faster,
You pay a price for jumping higher,
You pay a price for being stronger,
But, remember, you pay a heavier price for staying just where you are.

Time to hit the books back ! Cheerio !