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Kids Say The Darndest Things

Me: "Alex, I'm going to miss you today while you are at preschool...what am I going to do?"

Alex: "Maybe you should exercise some more."

1/4/11

During FHE...

Kurt: "So, how do we know our church is true?"

Alex: "Because we can just open the door and walk right in."

1/3/11

Alex, very sweetly to Natalie and Todd while brandishing a light saber:

"If you guys are mean I'm gonna whack you on the head with this!"

6/4/10

Alex, plopping himself into my lap after the Saturday afternoon session of General Conference:

"Wow! I liked that movie!"

4/3/10

Alex: "Mom, what do you want to be when you grow up?"

Me: "Ummm....a Mom."

Alex: "Yeah, and Dad can be a MONSTER!"

4/2/10

Natalie: "Hey Dad, I can do a cursive L."

Kurt: "What!?! You don't get to learn "cursing" until third grade."

Natalie: "But I know it! Mom taught me!"

Ah, yes..."cursing" ...a skill every mother should teach her child! ;o)

2/6/10

Sitting in line at the bank drive through...

Alex: "This is taking forever!"

Me: "I know. The bank is busy today."

Alex, pointing at the teller: "What is that girl's name?"

Me: "Ummmm, I don't know."

Alex: "I do! It's LAZY BONES!"

1/25/10

Kurt: "Hey, Emily...I think you should be a quantum physicist when you grow up."

Emily: "Dad! I just want to be a teacher...not a genius!"

1/7/10

A conversation in the van while sitting in the parking lot at Maverik...

Natalie: "Mom, why do those teenagers always hang around that picnic table?"

Me: "I don't know, maybe they're homeless." (I was kidding)

Natalie: Laughing, "Yeah! Maybe they are hobos!"

Laughter from all

Kurt: "No, they're not hobos, they're bums."

Todd: "Dad, what's a bum?"

Kurt: "Someone who doesn't have a job and just sits around all day."

A moment of silence

Todd: With the wheels in his head turning, "Hey, Mom! You don't have a job...You're a BUTT!"

12/23/09

Todd: "Hey, Alex, do you want to come sit by me?"

Alex: "Actually, no I don't...but thanks for asking, Toddy."

12/7/09

The morning after Alex dumped water on the VCR...

Todd: "Dad, do grown ups make lists for Santa?"

Kurt: "No, not usually."

Todd: "Oh, I thought that if they did you could ask Santa for a new VCR. Wait...I know! I will ask him for one and just give it to you!"

12/3/09

Me: "Todd, you'd better be good...Santa's elves might be watching!"

Todd: "Oh! Is that how Santa knows if we're being naughty or nice?"

Me: "Yep."

Todd: "Wow. I thought Santa just looked down on us like Jesus does."

11/28/09

Dinner Conversation:

Kurt: "Todd, what do you want to be when you grow up?"

Todd: "A veterinarian."

Natalie: "I want to be a doctor."

Emily: "I'm going to be a teacher."

Alex: "And I'm gonna be a FLYING RAT!

11/23/09

Alex, struggling to get away from me: "Let me go, OLD LADY!"

11/16/09

Me: "Alex, what are you doing with my phone?"

Alex: "Texting Albertson."

Me: "Really? What does he have to say?"

Alex: "He says he can't come play because his sister has the swine flu."

10/22/09

Kurt, after swatting the bum of a very naughty and deliberately disobedient Alex...

Kurt: "Alex, do NOT do that anymore! If you do, you'll get another swat on the bum and then you'll cry."

Alex: "I didn't cry...my bum cried."

10/05/09

Alex: "Dad, are we going crazy yet?"

Kurt: "Yeah."

Alex: "Do I need to put my shoes on?"

9/27/09

Me, taping a game card that Alex had nearly ripped to shreds...

Emily: "Mom, what are you doing?"

Me: "I'm fixing Alex's card."

Emily: "You mean his victim?"

9/25/09

Emily, singing: "All I want for Christmas is two contacts, two contacts, two contacts."

9/24/09

Todd, while lagging behind Kurt on the way to the soccer field: "Hey, Coach! Wait up!"

9/19/09

At dinner...

Kurt (being a trouble maker): "We eat chickens, pigs and cows, why don't we eat horses?"

Natalie: "Because horses are harmless!"

Emily: "Cows are harmless too!"

Natalie: "COWS ARE NOT HARMLESS! COWS KICK OUR POPPA!"

9/19/09

Todd, while telling me the story of The Three Little Pigs: "And the first little pig built his house out of weed."

8/25/09

Alex, to me, as I walked out of my room dressed in my ratty lawn mowing clothes: "Mom! You're cute!"

8/17/09

Me, while changing Alex's rather potent diaper: "Whew, Alex, YOU STINK!"

Alex: "I apologize."

8/13/09

Todd: "Hey, now I know why we have birthday parties with our friends and family."

Me: "Really? Why?"

Todd: "So they can celebrate with us and we won't be nervous to turn older."

7/23/09

Todd: "I'm kind of nervous to turn five."

Me: "Why?"

Todd: "I don't think I'll recognize myself."

7/21/09

Todd: "Mom...have you ever kissed Dad at work?"

Me: "Um...yeah."

Todd, giggling: "Are you serious?

7/20/09

Me (thinking about pouring cereal): "What should we have for breakfast?"

Alex: "Eggs and hash browns...that will taste yummy!"

7/11/09

Me, singing while driving in the rain: "Rain, rain, go away..."

Emily, interrupting: "AND NEVER COME BACK!"

6/17/09

Todd: "Jesus is tougher than Superman, huh Dad?"

Kurt: "Yeah, I guess He is, buddy."

Todd: "Yeah, 'cause Jesus made Superman."

5/29/09

Todd:"Mom, why don't we get the newspaper?"

Me:"Um, because Daddy and I usually read the news online."

Todd:"Well, can we get the newspaper?"

Me:"Why do you need the newspaper?"

Todd:"Because I like to read the newspaper while I eat my breakfast."

5/28/09

Alex, pointing to the picture of Christ on the wall:"Mom! That's Jesus!"

Me:"Yes, it is."

Alex:"Oh! Did you buy Him at the church?"

5/22/09

(Possible TMI Alert--But this is the life of a Mom)

Me, to Todd while helping him in the bathroom: "Bud, when are you going to learn to wipe your own bum?"

Todd:"Ummmm....maybe when I'm 18."

Great. Only 13 years to go!

5/17/09

Todd, while inspecting a giant anthill:"Mom, do ants watch TV?"

Me:"Uh, no."

Todd:"Do ants talk?"

Me: "Nope."

Todd:"Oh. Well, if they did, I would talk to them and tell them about TV."

5/11/09

Alex, pointing to the kindergarten playground at the girls' school:"LOOK! DISNEYLAND!"

4/30/09

Todd, while looking into the pantry:"Oh! I didn't know Rice Krispies were available!"

4/30/09

Todd:"It's okay to cry, huh Mom?

Me:"Yeah, it is."

Todd:"And it makes us feel better because all the sadness drips out and then we are happy."

4/27/09

Alex:"Mom! The BAD MONSTERS are in the laundry room

Me:"Really? What are they doing in there?

Alex:"Getting dressed for church."

4/17/09

Casting Her Ballot

>> Monday, October 27, 2008

Emily's class is following the presidential election.

This afternoon she came home with an assignment to do some research on the candidates. We were talking about the assignment when Emily asked...

"Mom, what's a Republican?"

I replied, "Republicans are..."
(and paused slightly, trying to make sure my answer was something she would understand)

During my slight pause, she chimed in with this gem...

"Old?"

BWAHAHAHAHAHAHA! :o) I'm still belly laughing over this one.

Well...Emily, not always, but in this case...YES!

Who Wants To Be A Winner?

>> Thursday, October 23, 2008

Do you know my friend Dianne?

If you don't, it's about time you get to know her.

She's an amazing friend and a talented long arm quilter.

She's also participating in Handmade Holiday, sponsored by the Nester.

Run, don't walk, to check out her blog...and register for her darling giveaway.

Look Out For Me...Oh Muddy Water

>> Wednesday, October 22, 2008

We had a great Fall Break!

(And by the way...when did UEA become 'Fall Break'? Just wondering...)

We road tripped to St. George to spend the long weekend with our friends Dan and Ivy and their kids.

We met Dan and Ivy in Colorado Springs last year. They moved in the same week we did and our families were introduced as "newbies" in our ward on the same day. To make a long story short, we became fast friends and I honestly feel having them there with us last year was a "tender mercy". It was so nice to have someone who was experiencing the same adjusment as we were. Coincidentally, they had the opportunity to move back to Utah shortly after we did.

It was a great few days...

A tasty steak BBQ
Tadpole and fish catching along with lizard and rabbit sightings
Yummy Mexican food
An amazing showing of Big River at Tuachan (if you've never been to Tuachan...GO! It was amazing. They flooded the stage for the river scenes...I could hardly stay in my seat...it was so incredible)
Fun at the farm/pumpkin patch/GRASS maze
Playing at the awesome Washington City Aquatic Center until we were "pruny" and waterlogged.

We enjoyed our vacation! Thanks to Dan and Ivy for their hospitality.

Catching river critters

The view from above

Best Buds

Pre-show photo op

The Terrorists Are Sedating My Grandpa

>> Wednesday, October 15, 2008

My Grandpa recently had heart surgery and a hip replacement. He is recovering at the Sunshine Terrace and will hopefully be able to go home in a few weeks.

The following is a classic example of marital miscommunication...

Me: Hey Kurt, get this...Grandma thinks the Terrace is sedating Grandpa because they don't want to deal with him.

Kurt: What?

Me: You know, sedating him.

Kurt: Huh? Who?

Me: THE TERRACE!

Kurt: THE TERRORISTS?

Me: No! The Terrace...as in the Sunshine Terrace.

Kurt: Wow. I know your Grandma is getting a bit 'funny' in her old age, but that seemed flat out crazy.

Hopefully there are no terrorists at the Terrace! :o)

A Confession

>> Friday, October 10, 2008

I listen to Miley Cyrus in my van.

And sing along.

While I am alone.

Tell Me How You Really Feel

>> Thursday, October 9, 2008

Last week while I was making dinner, Todd came into the kitchen and asked...

"Mom, what are you making?"

"Dinner," I replied.

My answer was greeted with a 'limp noodle' drop to the floor and the wail of...

"UUGGHH! I DON'T WANT DINNER! YOU ALWAYS MAKE NASTY STUFF FOR DINNER!"

"Well, what do you want me to make?" I asked.

His reply...

"LUNCH!"

Conference Weekend Mosaic

>> Sunday, October 5, 2008

Ah...Conference weekend! Nothing is better than church in my jammies! :o)

We played at Treehouse Museum on Saturday afternoon.

We ate a yummy breakfast this morning...I think we'll call it "Conference Casserole" from now on.

We made "Steph Cookies" this afternoon.

We had dinner with friends this evening.

It was a great weekend!

Notes to Self

>> Thursday, October 2, 2008

When making barbeque chicken sandwiches, open the barbeque sauce bottle with care. Especially if it has been sitting upside down on the hot stove top.
Also, be careful what you say when said sauce explodes all over the place...it might be heard by tiny ears...and then repeated.

Perpetual Motion

Kids Say The Darndest Things

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Posts From The Past

Casting Her Ballot

>> Monday, October 27, 2008

Who Wants To Be A Winner?

>> Thursday, October 23, 2008

Look Out For Me...Oh Muddy Water

>> Wednesday, October 22, 2008

The Terrorists Are Sedating My Grandpa

>> Wednesday, October 15, 2008

A Confession

>> Friday, October 10, 2008

Tell Me How You Really Feel

>> Thursday, October 9, 2008

Conference Weekend Mosaic

>> Sunday, October 5, 2008

Notes to Self

>> Thursday, October 2, 2008

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