“You get a strange feeling when you’re about to leave a place. Like you’ll not only miss the people you love but you’ll miss the person you are now at this time and this place, because you’ll never be this way ever again.” —Azar Nafisi
Change is tough. I remember when I moved to Utah. I hated it. I wanted to go home to Colorado and MY friends because Utah was weird and the people were weird and I was NEVER going to fit in or find friends here. Six years later and Utah is almost as much my home as Colorado is. It turns out my people were here after all.
Provo is crazy. And there have been times when it has felt like a bottomless pit of weirdness that I can't escape from. But I freakin' love this place.
This is where I found my best friends, my people, my soul mates. This is where I fell in love and had my heart broken {a couple times}. This is where I found myself, or at least started to. I discovered my passions. Many of my greatest pains and greatest joys have happened here. My six years here have been better and worse and more boring and more exciting than I ever would have guessed.
As I start to say goodbye to this time and this place I am thinking mostly about all the people I love that I have to leave. Goodbyes are dreadful. But it really is a strange feeling because it seems like I'm also saying goodbye to myself. I'm leaving behind this person that I am now. Of course I'll still be me in Virginia. But that's the thing. I'll be Me In Virginia, Me In Graduate School, Me Living Alone with NO ROOMMATES. Still me, but a different me. And, good grief, that's a weird feeling!
My life is about to change drastically. And most of the time I feel really excited about that. But sometimes it is scary as hell.
And also, I already really miss the people that I love.
