Sunday, August 7, 2011

Call for help. Serious help

271st post

I don't think I've ever been stressed academically before, like now.

Even though there were some modules which I didn't know how to pass, somehow I just won't really be that worried so long as it's sth that can be studied. 

Things are different now due to the heavy emphasis on practicals, ESP my core module of 8 credit units - 70 percent on prac T.T

I don't think anyone I know can understand the fear I have for practicals. It's been with me since the first lab lesson I attended way back in P4. And I always remember being the redundant, or even burden for the group whenever we conducted experiments, like seeing how magnets when hung freely, react to the various materials etc.

This continued to haunt me during my secondary school days, when I only got 20 percent for a chemistry practical and was being singled out in class. 

And now, being much more difficult with having to use equiments called ophthalmoscope and biomicroscope to check health of different parts of the eyes.

It doesn't help when I'm probably the only one who can't see and draw the stuff required and the prac test is next next week and there're only 2 prac sessions before that. 

I think I've never really ranted about academics here for the past two years, but this is kinda freaking me out cause I'll have to do all these scary things for the next 1.5 years continuously. 2.5 if I fail this module cause we aren't allowed to proceed to year 3.
  I've never expected myself to experience such a thing too. 



Maybe this is really a test of faith since I've never really needed as much help and assurance as now academically. 

God you've really gotta help me please. Please take away the dread and fear in me whenever I think about the next year. It's near unbearable

Monday, August 1, 2011

270th post


If Christianity believes in reincarnation, I'd most probably be that of Thomas. 

And maybe a lil of Paul.

Oh my, help me please God