I GOT MORE HAIR ON MY BALLS THAN ON MY HEAD

Sometime in the midst of the bullshit that is January, I decided to grow my hair out. It was short as fuck at the time, but since my hair grows fast, by the end of February, shit was unruly. Thankfully I have a friend that is a barber, and he cut it just so that it wouldn't look stupid while it was growing out. 

This campaign continued through the end of March, when it was cut/shaped again. But today when I got out of bed, it just looked like shit. I suppose I could have used some sort of product to tame it, but I didn't. I let my "freak-flag-hair" fly and after taking along walk, I determined that I could no longer be bothered with this nuisance growing out of my head.

SO...I charged up my electric razor, determined to take a bit off the top, and hopefully artfully blend it into the sides. Midway though, it looked decent. But then I cleaned out the adapter thing, and when I clicked it back on to clean up a few stray hairs, it clicked down to the 1 spot. SHIT. 

And so it was...I had to even the whole thing out with a 1 blade; my hair is short as fuck, but I'm not entirely unhappy with the result. My only fear/regret is that there exists a random patch on the back of my head that I didn't get too. [Below is the "crime" scene].

I PUNCHED MY ROOMIE'S CAT IN THE FACE

OK - it's not as bad as it sounds. Usually my Roomie's cats sleep in her bed and usually I sleep with my bedroom door closed. However, since she has been absent "Pippen" tends to end up sleeping next to me. I would shut my bedroom door to prevent this minor atrocity but with it being warm out I've been leaving my bedroom door open to keep cool.

I was having a really pleasant dream (not sure what exactly - I think I may have been on a beach or some shit) when my alarm went off this morning and the sound of NPR's Summer Pledge Drive made me jump out of bed - and in the process I hit my Roomie's cat in the face on accident (I blame it all on Ira Glass and his annoying nasal voice).

He was momentarily spooked but since he has a brain the size of a caterpillar he seemed to quickly forget, and in the moment it took me to slap the snooze button, he was nestled once again on the right side of my bed. Sorry Roomie! Normally I would have forgotten the whole incident, but my Catholic Guilt Complex would have eaten me alive had I not just gotten that off my chest.

And no, I will not be saying any "Our Father's" nor any other form of penance. Also, I will not be giving any additional money to NPR. Stop shaming me into thinking I'm cheap for listening to public radio for free!

In other news, I revved the engine on my car to 7,500 RPM's on the way to work. It felt good...