How do you measure a year?

NOTE: Yes, I posted this on the evening of Dec 8, even though Ellie's birthday is tomorrow. I am unable to post from my work PC, so this will have to do. If you really want to be autentico about reading this on THE DAY, feel free to re-read it at 8:53pm Dec 9. :)

There's a song from the musical Rent that seems appropriate for this blog post. It's called "Seasons of Love" and it asks chiefly, how do you measure a year? It's a good question - especially for me and my husband...and for this year. It's been 12 months, 52 weeks, 365 days, however you want to measure it, since I gave birth to my daughter. But I want to measure this year in more meaningful terms. So, with all apologies to the late Jonathan Larson (he wrote the song), here goes:

Daylights, sunsets, midnights, and cups of coffee - Oh man, how the days seemed so long in the beginning. I felt at times that we would never make it this far. Ellie was not an easy newborn and I felt that I would surely never be able to rest or relax or enjoy a day ever again. One day bled into the next and into the next, and before I knew it, we had made it through the midnight feedings, soothings, and just crying together from exhaustion. I don't drink coffee, but I had my fair share of Diet Coke and strong black tea to help me through. :)

Inches, miles, laughter and strife - Growing was painful for us. All of us. At first, Ellie grew and gained so slowly, I was sure we'd get sent to the hospital as a FTT (Failure To Thrive) case. But we didn't...once we resolved ourselves not to fight the Lactation Battles, we started seeing a difference in Ellie's growth. Inches and pounds added up and now we have a big, happy, round baby to show for it. We laughed a lot this year, but we certainly had our share of trouble. Adjusting to life as new parents is full of challenges and hardship, but through it all we could look at our sweet, stubborn, darling girl and remember the best medicine of all: laughter.

Truths that we learned and times that we cried - We learned that parenting is not an exact science. All the books and advice in the world aren't substitutes for just doing it. You have to be willing to step up - and willing to cry - when things don't go the way you imagined. And you have to be strong enough to do what you have to do. Before the baby came, we didn't know what sort of person she would be. I don't think we truly understood the one basic truth of having a child: that child is her own person. And you have to adapt accordingly. And sometimes, dammit, you just have to cry - tears of joy or sorrow, frustration or triumph.

But above all, we can measure this year in love. 525,600 minutes of pure, sweet, unconditional love. And for that, Elliot Delaney, we thank you from the bottom of our hearts. Our world is so much better now that you are in it. And we can't wait for the next 525,600 minutes, baby girl. We love you.

Busy, busy...busy.

So the husband has been away for work again, this time it's a two-week trip to Prague. He comes home on Saturday and I'm stoked. Sure, it'll be nice to see his smiling face again but mostly I'm stoked because I need some help!

I've been trying to get all the stuff pulled together for Ellie's birthday party next month and it's really hard to do that when I don't have anyone else here to keep an eye on the soon-to-be birthday girl (oh, and working full-time doesn't help that either). She's into everything...she's even figured out how to climb the stairs. Now, you might wonder why we don't have a baby gate there. We have found out it's very, very difficult to find baby gates that can be modified to attach to a staircase with two bannisters, rather than those with one bannister and a wall. Ugh. But we need one. I am so scared of her tumbling down the stairs and onto the hardwood floor and hurting herself.

Anyway, it's not just the party planning and prep that is hard to do with Ellie and no help around. Everything else is harder too. And she is okay with her 'baby cage,' aka play yard, for a few minutes but it takes longer than a few minutes to clean bathrooms, or vaccum our house, or fix dinner, or...you get the idea. As soon as she's over being in there she is OVER.IT.FOR.REALSIES. and if you don't get her out, she starts screaming. Fun! I need my co-parent now before mah house falls apart.

So yeah, Ellie and I went back to Moscow last weekend (Boris stayed behind at doggie daycare and hung out with his canine pals) for the BSU-UI game. Not much of a game, really, but we had fun and Ellie did AWESOME on the drive over and back. I was dreading it, but she definitely surprised me with how well she did. I think it was a good idea on my part (MOMMY BRAG) to put her Alphabet Pal caterpillar in her carseat so she could jam out to the music it plays while we were on the road. I am learning...

It's hard to believe the year is almost over and our little baby is nearly a toddler! She's getting better at letting us help her walk and she'll try standing on her own for a few seconds. I do not over-encourage this b/c frankly, I am just not ready for her to walk. She's growing up so fast! But like she's prone to doing, Ellie will walk when she decides it's time so I guess I should just get over it and be prepared.

And that concludes this whirlwind of an update. Next up for us: Thanksgiving in the Lew and my friend Marsha's wedding!

I voted, so there.

I love voting. I especially love voting as an Oregonian. For six election cycles now I've had the luxury of voting by mail. It's the best!! You don't feel rushed, you don't have to stand in line at your local church/jr. high/whatever, and you can drop your vote off in a handy dropbox on your way to work.

I also am getting excited for the end of election season. Am I glad that the US House is likely to be a Republican majority again? No. But I am glad for the imminent end of the campaigning. I hate campaigning almost as much as I love voting. All the mailers, and radio ads, and teevee commercials...it's just too much, especially since most of the campaigns are so dang negative! I get really tired of that crap...I realize it must work on most people, since the candidates keep resorting to such garbage, but I hate it.

So rejoice, America! Today is election day, which means that for at least nine months or so, you don't have to worry about crappy negative political advertising and campaigning overloading your mailboxes and airwaves.

Get out and vote. All the cool kids are doing it.

BLOG POST

I'm Internet-shouting that, by the way. BLOG POST. I was implored - no, really - by two friends and my sister on Facebook to post something, anything here for their entertainment this week. Welllll, I didn't post on Monday b/c my weekend/early part of the week sucked giant balls. Ellie is teething, has gnarly diaper rash, AND a cold so sleep and happiness were in short supply until yesterday.

Guess what happened yesterday? Oh, the husband returned from his 12-day odyssey to Israel. Of course on the day he comes back, Miss Thang turns a corner and stops being a total sleepless crankball. Babies.

END BLOG POST.

Monday Musings, No. 2, Vol. 22

Dude. So, the husband left for Israel again (work trip, again) on Friday morning. I am officially On My Own with Ellie and I'm really tired. I love my child, but being a single parent is hard! Especially when one is not used to it. Mommied-out Musings below:

Coming to work today feels like a vacation. That's messed up.
On the other hand, Ellie's been a trooper for me. No real fits or whinefests. She did get pissy last night when we were at church b/c I was helping with our Youth Group and she was with a sitter - her usual sitter, but in a different place - and would randomly start fussing and crying for me.
I am in my new office today and it's cool. I mean, the guy across the hall could be a SMIDGEN quieter, but overall, I like it. No more gray-on-gray-on-gray at the Nerd Farm.
My football hiatus is going well. And apparently it's working, because the Niners won this week...against the gross Raiders, but a win's a win. So yeah.
I think I need to see a chiro about my back/neck pain. But I'm scared b/c I'm a baby about getting my neck and back popped. I fear paralysis, seriously.
The flight back from Folsom last week went well. Flights, actually. I wasn't late for either of them.
Tonight after Ellie goes to bed, I am watching the season finale of Mad Men on the DVR. I am very excited but also sad...why do the good shows have to have fewer episodes? Quality > Quantity, I suppose.
Ellie's cruising all over now. I think she'll start walking before her first birthday. She refuses to let anyone 'help' her practice standing or walking...it's actually hilarious how mad she gets. She'll stomp her wee feet and yell at you until you let her go and she sits down, then crawls over to the nearest table/chair/whatever and pulls herself up and goes.
Target has really cute winter coats for $20 this week. I got one for Ellie and I love it! It's a 4-in-1 system so we can get a lot of use out of "one" coat.
I ate a Lean Cuisine chicken enchilada suiza for lunch. I like it, but it makes me all burpy and heartburny for some reason. Blech.
We have this fancy Starbucks coffee dispensing contraption in our new office kitchen space. I am half-afraid to try it. What if scalding hot coffee spills all over me and I have to be in a burn unit for weeks? I'm paranoid.
Ellie is rocking a bit of a bullet (baby mullet) right now. It's so cutely white trash.

Quick On-the-Road Post

I am sitting in my hotel room in Folsom, CA and missing my baby. Oh, and my husband too. :) I am here for work training through Thursday night and it sucks! No offense, but Folsom isn't really that interesting, nor do I know where to find anything cool to do. (I did locate an In-N-Out, so I've got that going for me.)

I nearly missed my flight this morning. Quick note: the company where I work has a fleet of small planes to ferry us worker bees among our 4 major US sites, and they fly out of a small airport about 5 mins from my house. Which is AWESOME on a regular day and EXTRA SUPER EFFING AMAZING AWESOME on a day when I set my alarm wrong and didn't wake up until 7 minutes before check in started. After throwing my hair up in a messy ponytail, brushing my teeth, smearing on deodorant, and getting dressed/throwing toiletries into my suitcase, I got out of the house at 5:25am. When check in started. I made it to the airport and got checked in with about 6 minutes to spare before check in closed for the flight.

So...yeah, flight went well, and I got to Folsom on time. Since my training didn't start until 9:30am, I was able to come to my hotel and get an early check-in so that I could shower and stop being gross. That was pretty rad, I think my classmates today would agree. Class went well, I came back to the hotel, finished getting settled in, and got to talk to the husband and babeh (yay for iPhone 4 and FaceTime!) for a bit before grabbing a gourmet meal at the Taco Bell that is just across the parking lot from my room.

One quick football-related musing: I need to take a break from the NFL. The Niners are 0-5 and my FF team isn't doing much better. I will check my lineups to ensure it is full (meaning: no players on bye or injured in my starting lineup) and that is it. No checking the scores of either a)Niner games or b) my FF matchup. I am not on anxiety meds, and if I don't want to be, I have to take this break before I lose it. I realize I shouldn't be so invested in this, especially since there really isn't any of my money involved, but dang.

Oh, one more: I saw the photos of "Mini Favre" on deadspin.com. Um...not that impressive, asshat. Keep that in your pants, where it belongs.

Update Tuesday

No real Musings again this week. My Muse-dar is on the fritz, I guess. But I do have some updates for you lovely readers:

1. Ellie is a BEAST these days. The Teething Demons have gotten a hold of her again, but this time it's bad. I hope that means we will see some teeth this round. Otherwise, I may cut her gums open my damn self. I hate teething. Probably not as much as Ellie does, but still.

2. My sister and stepmom are coming over for a visit this weekend! We are planning a weekend chock full o' fun - assuming El's 2nd flu shot doesn't kick her wee arse like the first one did. I really want to go to a pumpkin patch, and with the husband's travel schedule, this is the only weekend this month we can do it. Fingers crossed.

3. Ellie had her first swimming lesson last Saturday and did AWESOME! The husband was in charge of her in the water and he did a great job. Out of the 7 babies in her class, all of them were with their daddies. Pretty nifty, if you ask me. Ellie's a natural in the water, she just loves it. I hope this continues, since I love to swim too.

4. Our friends C and A are getting married on Saturday night (which is extra awesome b/c we have free babysitting courtesy of Grandma and the Nanny-Auntie!) and I'm so excited for them! And to get dressed up and have a fun night with the husband. Grown up time!

5. The Blazers' preseason games kick off tonight but Ellie and I are staying home. With her beset by demons, I didn't think it would be a good idea to haul her all the way to the Rose Garden and deal with a very-likely cranky and tired wee one there. So we'll hang out at home and I can watch last night's episode of Gossip Girl.

6. I leave for four days of work travel on Monday...to scenic suburban Sacto. Oh yes, don't be jealous. I'm not at all excited about this because a) I can't bear to be away from my Bear that long and b) the suburbs of Sacramento are...not...fun. I do get to go to bed whenever I want though...and that is awesome. I can go to bed at 7pm if I want to! So I've got that going for me.

7. The Niners are killing my soul. For realsies. I cannot bear this trainwreck of a season for much longer. At least the Vandies are doing well, but otherwise, gah. Football is making me teh crazee.

Dragalicious

I didn't do a Musings post yesterday, just didn't feel like it. And today I have something more important to discuss, fair reader. My inner drag queen. Oh yeah, she's fierce, fabulous and LOVES sparkles. I realized that I have an IDQ the other day...I was looking at shoes online and I immediately gravitated to the photos of the sparkly, flashy, nearly-impossible-to-walk-in ones first. And it hit me: I am a drag queen at heart.

If I could, I would dress like Joan on Mad Men all the time, but with a draggy twist. Sparkly shoes, bigger hair, you know the drill. But I don't have the money or time to invest in said style, so I dress very plainly and wear Chuck Taylors most of the time. But inside....lawd, inside my heart bursts with joy at a nicely teased and sprayed bouffant, sparkly 5.5-inch platform heels, and a form-fitting retro dress with cap sleeves. Honestly, I have no idea what this says about me. I figure it's good to have an alter ego, even if it is super dragalicious.

Monday Musings, No. 2, Vol. 21

It's a post-vacation Monday and I'm swamped with work. But I need a short break, so I thought I'd post some Musings. We spent Thursday thru Sunday in Spokane, WA, visiting the husband's family. It was a good trip b/c we got to meet our baby niece for the first time...I had forgotten how tiny 2 month old babies are! And how snuggly, and sweet, and just plain wonderful. It almost made me want another one now...but then Ellie would start shouting for no reason, or fall down and bonk her noggin, or some such thing and snap me out of it. She's such a helpful baby. Musings are a go:

New trick alert!! Nose picking is now a 'skill' mastered by the little lady. Very ladylike, indeed, especially when she offers her boogery finger to you as a snack. Um, thanks, but no.
And yes, we are working on the concept of sharing. Which is definitely a work in progress and probably will be for a long time. Ellie's like her momma, and doesn't share well with others.
I am addicted to the Mad Men cocktail-mixing game on my iPhone.
The Vandals are 2-1 after a resounding win over UNLV in the Dome on Saturday night! I wish we could have gone...we were so close! Only 1.5 hours away!
Ellie now has a Halloween costume: she will be a giraffe. The husband found it at Old Navy and we had to get it. She's the cutest giraffe you've ever seen.
I need a vacation from my vacation. I'm so tired today.
The Niners are playing the Saints tonight. I want to be excited and think happy thoughts of a Niners' upset victory but I can't. I'm too much of a realist.
I think it's funny how people romanticize the idea of owning an old house. And then they get to see one for themselves and recoil at the work it takes to bring it up to snuff. Having grown up in an old house, yeah, I find it funny. It's also why I live in a brand-new house. I don't need that much work.
It's apple season! I love Fall food.
Speaking of Fall, I suppose now that we have a kid we have to do the whole pumpkin patch thing and carve a jack-o-lantern this year. Of course, she won't remember it at all, but we need the photo op. Parenting!
I rode in the backseat with Ellie on our way to and from Spokane (when I wasn't driving on the return trip...the husband got sick the night before we left so I had to help with driving duties). It is a good way to pass the time. Keeping her entertained also keeps me entertained.
Blazers preseason games start up in about two weeks. Where does the time go, seriously??
I keep finding stuff I "need" in the PB catalogs that come to my house every other day. This is a problem. But their blue smoke velvet curtains are just so divine, dammit. I NEED THEM.
I got the paper I need to make Ellie's b-day invites over the weekend too. We're going with a snowflake "theme" and an ivory/light blue color palette.
Pilates is working. I can feel my abs getting stronger all the time. Even my butt is firmer. Aren't you glad you know that about me?

Growth News and Flu Shot Blues

So, the little lady had her 9-month check up on Friday. She is doing so great! Almost in the 75th percentiles for both length AND weight (w00t!) and even her teeny noggin has grown - from the 5th to the 10th percentile. We were told no vaccines this time, except...the flu shot.

I was actually glad for Ellie to get the flu shot. She goes to daycare and we all know daycares and schools are like giant petri dishes of germy badness. So we assent to the shot and are told that she'll need a second one in a month to complete the series (this is SOP for all infants under 1 yr old). After a brief cry, Ellie is fine and we head back to daycare. She had a great rest of the day - no reaction to the shot or anything like that.

Fast forward to Saturday morning. Ellie wakes up and is a little snuffly and crabby, but she sometimes is in the morning, no big deal. Well, as the day goes on, she becomes crankier and crankier, and her face is a mess of green slimy snot and slobber. She's a hot flu-shot-reacting mess. That dead virus in the vaccine has triggered her army of white blood cells to go on the attack and now she's the walking wounded. Okay, crawling wounded. Whatever.

She hardly slept on Saturday night (whyyyyyy didn't we set up the humidifier before bed that night?? We are dumb, that's why) and was a fussy butthole all day on Sunday. We did set up the humidifier on Sunday night - which uses some sort of liquid Vicks VapoRub in it, so it's extra awesome - and she slept great. I also think she was just exhausted. By Monday morning, she was back in good spirits. Still snotty nosed, but not nearly as bad as the weekend.

However, on Monday morning guess who woke up with a sore throat and a stuffy nose? If you guessed ME, you are correct. I didn't even get a flu shot, and I'm dealing with the aftermath. I'm a casualty of germ warfare. *sigh*