Careful ah....

"I tell you honestly, here is not really a safe place."

"Lock your doors properly ah..."

"Must lock all the doors."

"The house next door got burned before."

"The previous tenant of your room got mugged."

"Actually here is not a safe place."

"Upstairs got kena robbed before."

"Make sure your doors are locked.

"Since I came here, got three snatch thefts edi...."

"The house opposite got burned oso."

"Padlock your room door."

"Must be careful ah, staying here is not very safe."


And here, is where I'm staying now.

Right?

I never would have expected the hole that suddenly appear in my being when it finally hit me that I'll be going to KL tomorrow.

It's nothing like I've ever felt before.

I suppose staying at home for a couple of months and being pampered has a part in it. I had a comfy bed, good food, my family... who doesn't like staying at home...?

Spending 4 years in Kampar didn't help either. Kampar was basically my second home. And I had a bunch of awesome friends there, cool lecturers, studies that I could make sense of, a place to stay that didn't suck the life blood out of me.

Unconsciously, subconsciously and consciously, I'm comparing the life I may have in KL to the life that I had back here.

The thought of taking a course I don't feel well equipped enough to master, driving on the confusing roads, and staying in a sad little room is enough to make my spirits take a dive off the Scottish cliffs.

But then again, I'm probably just thinking too much. KL is not the end of the world right?


Right?

Before, and now

When I was a kid, I always told myself that I WOULD NOT want to grow up to be like some of the adults that I've met.

I felt that they were childish, selfish, rubbish and other kinds of ish...

Then I grew up.

And I find that the adults are the still the same- childish, selfish, rubbish and other kinds of ish.

But now, I'm an adult too.

And I'm scared that kids would one day tell themselves that they would not want to grow up to be me.

*flip flip flip*

Thank you, my lecturers who have given me useful notes.

They may save me from being kicked out from doing my Masters.

Expectations

I am a person who likes to go trailer hopping. I like to waste a small part of my time youtubing for movies trailers.

And trailers would either raise or lower my expectations for a particular movie. Try as I may not to have expectations, a teensy tiny bit of my mind would just have to go "Oh, the trailer looks good. The movie should be awesome!" or "Yeerr... what's that?!"

So, when I go to watch a movie, there is this small voice already saying "This should be good!" or "I'm only here coz I there is no other movie to watch." Not good.

And that is what that has been happening recently.

I was kinda excited about Green Lantern and Captain America. The trailers looked kinda cool, with the bing bing bang bang and the hotness of Ryan Reynolds and Chris Evans in properly placed snippets to capture attention.

But the movies hoh... Were like plain bread and butter. No tuna or egg or ham in between. It's enough to eat when you're hungry, but no yummy filling to make you satisfied =(

On the other hand, when I saw the Rise of the Planet of the Apes trailer, I remembered thinking "Oh, this is one of those movies where they will show a stupid human, an impossibly smart chimp, human mistreat chimp, chimp get angry, chimp start killing, humans get scared, humans use big bombs, humans kill chimp."

And I hate movies like that, I hate movies showing animals to be wild and savage when the blame should lie with humans themselves. And I hate that in the end, the animal has to die "for the good of mankind".

But Planet of the Apes was surprisingly good. Awesome, even. I read a few good reviews about it, but the movie still hit me like a tonne of bricks. The story of how Ceaser the chimp started the ape revolution was just amazing. In fact, I was rooting for the apes to succeed. And the visual team for this movie should be given an Oscar for their work man.

So yeah, expectations. Never trust in them...

True story.