christmas!

nah, actually i dont really celebrate christmas.

But still, after all the studying, its hard to not get into christmas mood. O:

I decorate, decorations! LOLLLL

christmas wouldnt be complete without christmas song right?

not to mention christmas tree.

i guess this could be a substitution for the roasted ones. :P

:D

clearing my mind. :O

Heeeeee, taking a break from studying andddddd here i am. :D

new speakers! :D

Usually speakers come in pairs right. The old one, umm. Has only one functioning side, and i had to put the good side of the speaker right in front of the monitor to balance off each side.

Owh, aaaaand. This movie is awesome :D

Have to say this, tom cruise is really really good. For his age :O

The main attraction of the movie. I WANT THIS. DAMNNN. My new dream car ♥♥

I'll buy this car! soon, when i find the money. :P

okay. slack time over. Time to hit the books, again. 

Oops.

I should stop tweeting sho much. Tbh, I think using twitter to vent out all sorts of sudden mood swings is indirectly spamming other's timeline. And, yesh, thank someone for reminding that I have a blog for that.

First of all, its wrong for me to be here. I'm supposed to be studying. Sigh, this is why I hate having exams right after holidays. It's fairly normal for me to slack until the last week and start studying like a mad woman. Damn, I guess the old routine is starting again. Truthfully, my fear of failure is growing as time passes. Fear will lead to stop slacking, stop slacking will lead to study, study will lead to good grades, good grades will get me into good universities. Makes sense right? in an absurd way. Sho, the conclusion is, I have to fear as much as possible to get me in the study mood.

Yesterday was, weird. I picked up the weirdest phone call in my life, not to mention scary. I think after picking up the phone, I sort of overreacted. Damn, you couldn't possibly blaming me for doing so. Toopid phone call made my eyes turn red for no reason.  Well, things are okay now. hopefully. 

Heeeeeeeee, met some my high school classmates later that night. Its nice to see that everyone is moving on. The biggest regret? I DIDNT EAT MY MOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO COW. sad. Sigh, there wasn't time lah. Didnt even have the chance to poke ball, in other words, pool. :P 

Lalala~ I should stop now and face the books. 

Awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww :P

The nostalgic moments when i listen to some of the old songs in my playlist! O: Andddddd, I reread some of my old posts! It made me rethink of my reason to blog. Most of them were so lively, not to mention fun. :P

Haaa, anyway, its SEM BREAK! ENJOYING EVERY MOMENT OF IT <3 Lalala~ I shall forget about the jan exams for a moment and concentrate on living my life instead. Well, actually, i'm supposed to start studying today. Er, maybe later, after I wake up from my beauty sleep. My beauty sleep very important one. :D

Well, the last few days before sem break was pretty awesome as well. Totally loved the moment where most of our chemistry people had stomach ache on the same day. ;) And skipped Math and stats class together. Wow, such a coincidence mann. :P What could I say? midvalley was fun? Hahaha, should have done more that day, sadly there weren't any movies that morning. D: SAD.

Thursday was lagi awesome! had loads of fun fooling around taking pictures. FRIDAY, was awesomest! if thats even a word. I actually drove to the curve without having an exact idea of how to get back. :O Took loads of short cut that day, but thank the traffic, i couldn't arrive earlier. If only I was earlier, I would hop to ikea to get some icecream. That but luckily the traffic condition from my house isnt as bad as munhong's one. It took 50 minutes for him to get into the highway, thats just legendary. We went to buy bday present after that. Oops, I forgot to state the occasion.

Happy birthday Isaac! Thanks for treating us to karaoke! O:

AND MY GOD. The cake was out of this world! :P

Speaking of food, KLCC POPCORN ISSSS NICEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE. I actually went there on purpose just to have the popcorn. And do some shopping lah. but that isnt the main point. THE POPCORN, reallyyyyyyyyyy damnnnnnnnnn niceeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee. I thought these popcorn are only available in Singapore. But a genius brought them to Msia. :D But the queue was a killer. Which reminds me of the crowd in Klcc. When I looked down from the topmost floor, all I could see is black dots moving around. The sight was truly frightening. I wonder where all the people come from. 

TMR, okay later today, LAN RESULTS WILL BE COMING OUT. Or so I've heard. Please please just let me get a freaking pass. If I get 50, i would be more that happy. :D Lets hope for the best shall we?

:D :D

I'm human too

Thoughts are flooding my mind; but somehow, putting them into words are rather impossible. Cutting them short, it comes down to this sentence "I'm not good enough."

Honestly? I've never truly excelled in anything I do. I'm that average girl who is loud, self centered and boyish. In my past 18 years of life, I can't find the one achievement that I'm truly proud of. Maybe, being average at everything isn't good enough. Or maybe, my effort wasn't enough. I'm not being emo or anything. I'm merely trying to reflect on myself.

Come to think of it, my life is shoo sad. ._.

Hmm, I've always wondered what other people see me as. When I look in a mirror, I see an idiot staring back at me. Maybe they see the same thing. sad. Sigh, my something wrong with my confidence today. D:

Oh, i realised I'm a coward. sigh, there are too many things in the world that i'm afraid of. #1 on the list. Failure.

AAAAAAAAAAAAaaaaaaaaaaa, I don't know what came into me. Stuff like this keep haunting me as the externals exams are getting nearer. I keep telling myself to take a break, but my guilt is crawling at my back.

Okay, i shall forget whatever that is unnecessary. And focus on what i wanna achieve. Focus dear.

1st impressions.

Finally, a formal post. My past few posts were quite, random and informal. :P

Hmm, who shall I start with?

HanRui, perhaps. Since she's my kai ma. My first impression of her is, wow, so thats how my friend's friend looks like. Honestly speaking, I thought she was someone really hard to approach. My bad tho, for judging the book by its cover. Before knowing her, I've always thought that she was the ganas kind of girl. Well, I think i could say the same after i've known her for so long. Seeing her using her multipurpose file to whack people. 打是疼骂是爱 so you should know how much she loves u. :P Well, she's a nice person, and she acts like a mom sometimes. :P

Well, there's one other person doing this thing i supposed. And that person is Thongyen. I remembered the 1st time we met, when i was sitting beside her on our very first class. Its in SR 2.9 i think, madam lin's class. After our 1st convo, I had the wrong idea of her being a goody two shoes. She seemed like those, obedient and quiet girl. Which turns to be a whole other story. She ponteng class quite alot one. Sorry to say the bad side out you out loud. :P But deep down, she's of course, nice, funny and princesslike. :)

Hmmmm, 3rd person. My dear YinHuan. My 1st impression. I dont know lah. *pauses and think* Oh, back then, I honestly thought that she and khye were sort of, an item. Oops, i didnt mean to say that out loud. But but, I remembered seeing her hanging out with him a whole lot. I keep seeing both of them together, its not unusual for me to get the wrong idea right? And one more, the one that is quite accurate, she's really sampat one. The way she whacked khye gave me the idea that she is, indeed very the 38 and very easy to approach. Well, i rmbed we had our lunch together during the 1st few days of class. Umm, i dont want to say this, but heeee i've known since then that she eats quite slow. :P

4th person! Pam! I doubt that she'll see this post lah. I met her on the very 1st day of college! Orientation day. I rmb sitting beside her back then. From our 1st conversation, the way she talks. I've always thought that she is a very smart person. And, the judgement i made wasn't wrong. Heeee. Well, since the very 1st day of college, I've always thought of her as a creative person. And I'm not that wrong either, look at the kolam she did for ayz's deepavali celebration! its awesome. :D AND AND, the cakes that she bake are super awesome. :D

5th personn. Well, in life, we need to be grateful to a certain extent. So, YeeHliang, :D Thanks for alll the food. Ok ok, back to the 1st impression topic. When I saw you in college, I thought that he looked wayy too farmilliar to be someone i didnt see before. Which turned out that we're from the same high school. 1st impression, hmmmm. I've always thought that this guy, very good at flirting one. HAHAHA. oops, didnt mean to sound so direct. Well, i cant say that i'm wrong yet, maybe he just havent show ur true colours or something.

*omg how am i going to keep this up for 20+ people?*

Hmm, Who's the next person i met in college. Its Zhiyan i think. My memory is awesome. I remembered the very 1st convo we had, in chemistry class. On the day when spm results were released, i think. Well, I was judging by the hair,  oops, sorry for bringing bad memories of the half bald head. My 1st impression of this person was a serious guy, and a smart guy. I guess i got the front part wrong, I never ever thought that this guy would be some sort of *okay pervert seems to be very strong word* :P So, he's the guy with the big head. :P

Munhong! I thought this guy was a total nerd. HAHAHA. Okay, i guess I shouldn't be this direct. And i was judging the book by its cover again. Even tho he wont see this. He's not lah, of course. In fact, he's an aunty who loves to watch soap drama. Well, the moment i heard that he's from chunghwa, i knew that he's smart. So the stuff he knows dont surprise me. Just that, he being an aunty is just, damn weird. Well, Initially i thought that he was the quiet type, until i get to know him. He really does talk alot of crap. :P

Sheungjien! The curly haired boy who sat one table beside me when i was registering for the course! Okay, to be honest, i didnt recognize him in class lah. But of course i remembered the moment you told me. :) Thats how awesome my memory is. :P Well, we didnt really talked during the 1st sem, so my 1st impression him is a quiet guy, and quite lame, from what i've heard. And, yeah, he should go along with munhong, the nerd type. I guess i dont have to apologise for being honest right? OH, AND, initially, I thought that he knows mandarin. He just dont look. banana. LOL

Wong xing yee. I honestly thought that i heard wrongly when he told me his name. Anyway, I've always thought that he's like younger. or something. My 1st impression of him? A little kid. no seriously, Sighs, i think i really need to get rid of the habit of judging people by what they look like. I thought he was a little kid, who looked good in his pink shirt. Well, he's more matured than most of the poeple in class. He just dont look that way.

Jeremy. I guess someone just have to crown him king of lameness. Its not like im being rude or something. he's just super lame, and the jokes that he crack are.well.lame. 1st impression? curly haired boy, maybe malnutrition or something. I think he seriously needs to eat more.

Jiaren. 1st impression, a kind and quiet person. Why kind? cause the 2nd day i drove to college, my car battery was dead. And he helped me call his mom to check how to jump start. Well, Its the thoughts that count, yeah, little things give me great impact. And and, he's the type of person, that is quiet, but throws a bomb when he speaks. (Y)

Rebecca! :D Awesome barista! Our 1st conversation was in wisma help right. Well, my 1st impression of you was, i cant remember. LOL. I just remember talking to you. :)  When i 1st saw her in class, I was really happy because there is one more girl taking the same combination as myself. :D Oh, I know, I've always thought of her as the quiet type. The woman power type. :) Well, im not all wrong. :D

Weng Ee. Another I-thought i heard wrongly, when he said his name. Well, I spent quite awhile to get his name right. :P My 1st impression, is this guy and jiaren from the same school? OH, and it didnt seem that he were the type to sleep in class. seriously, the incident where he slept in mdm lin's class was rather shocking. Heeee, get enough sleep dude. :P

14th person! omygod im halfway there. :D Ayzvara! Well, I thought that his name was a mouthful the 1st time u approached me. sorry to say. heee. Well, 1st impression. THIS GUY IS SHOOOO TALL. -_- Abit too tall. I sometimes wonder what he eats to be that tall. hahaha, i need to raise my head a whole lot to talk to him weih. I sometimes wonder, if the door is short, and ure not careful, what would happen. :P

Wern yee! The quiet girl in class. well, you and YeeTeng are of the same order. Sama sama quiet. sama sama pretty. :D Anyway, 1st impression. these 2 girls surely very guai lui one. Mana tau. selalu ponteng class. tsk tsk. I guess i judged wrongly again. Oh and wern yee, I've never thought that she would ever layan mr chan! :P

JJ! okay, to be honest, i thought that mdm lin was his grandma or something. LOL. The only korean in our class. It was quite sad that he had to drop further math. Well, it was fun being in the same class with him. 1st impression! my god i keep running away from the topic! Well, i used to love kpop. When i saw him, its like little kids seeing sweets. I mean, Its a real life korean in my classs! More than those korean idols could ever be. Heeeeeee :P

Alfred. I thought that, he and yh are related or something. Oops. :D that was the very 1st impression lah. Of course, after knowing him, they have totally different personalities. :))

Zhiyeong. the sei lou ye. Well, we were from the same school as well, but I've never thought that he is that sampat pls. I mean, from chs, our school prefects are usually, less sampat one. Honestly, I thought he was damn scary, and fierce. I dont know why, I just had the impression of it. Until he came to ask me the sampat question. "who you like ah?" I STUN PLS. Seriously stun. I've learnt that one simple question can ruin a person's reputation. *wow, it sounded like my personal statement* :P

Khye! errrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr, I;ve never had a normal conversation with him actually. Its like, we're from different worlds or something. But, 1st impression. parallel to yinhuan's one, i thought that they were an item. Well, he could be very funny sometimes. The way he talks is memang the funny one. 

Kim Leong. I've always thought that. he's damn quiet. BUT PLEASE. he's a big flirt. hahaha, too bad i've only realised that when he was flirting with yeeteng and wernyee. :P So sorry to say ur secret out loud. :) Oh, i think i should get him to teach me hakka some time near future. (Y)

Ariff. 1st impression, well. I dont know u that well, so the impression i had and the impression now is more or less the same. :\\ that is, he always ponteng class. LOL.

1st impression. mission complete. (Y) 22 people. Well, These are the awesome people i've met. Haha, u know what makes them awesome? because these people know me! #perasanmoment

Anyway, I feel so awesome after completing this post pls. (Y) mommy and I need burned the midnight oil to finish this post. SO AWESOME PLS. *flips hair* :D

:D <3

One month left.

Its five weeks, to be exact. Thanks to the particular someone who keep telling me its 5 weeks, not one month. Anyway, i doubt that one week is going to make a huge difference. SighsImsonotreadysighs. I cant face the battle yet! I merely starting on my studies. *freaks out*

To be honest, I'm here because i dont feel like opening the book right now. Somehow, my guilt will come to eat me up every time i don't study. OTL

lalala~

I dreamt about something nice last night. <3 

OH OH AND MY PERSONAL STATEMENTNGAM NGAM 4000 characters. I cant even add any punctuation. HAHA i feeeeeeeeeeeeeeeel so awesome. :P

I screwed my physics paper up, really. badly. I just hope he dont change my forecast. ==!!

Okay, I'm being ridiculous. Actually, I dont have anythng real to blog about. I'm just, drawing the bridge as i cross the river. Does that even make sense? 

<3 :)