What's life for??

The question that keep on popping out in my mind recently...

This week is really a hectic week.We have DI for two days, Maths Test, ESL text production essay and the terrible econs assignment. Luckily all have done..somehow I'm relieved and finally can have a nap..As described by Michelle, this is the longest nap I take all these while..haha..Perhaps I just feel relieved..

As time passes. I just can't avoid the fact that selfishness that existed in human is in-born..I come across so much cases..The one that can be so close to you can just change totally out of the sudden..Its so ridiculous..Sometimes I just keep asking myself am I choosing the wrong path at the first place..If I were to choose the second path that time, I guess I am in one of the university in Malaysia now..Leading a simple yet wonderful uni life which I really look forward to..But here, I cant search for any warmth.I'm just overwhelmed with coldness and selfishness..Or perhaps that so called scholar's life?!!Am I able to cope with such life?I don't know...I'm not who I m right now..I'm not supposed to be like that...and this is not the life that I supposed to have..The more I question myself, the more depressed I feel...

I miss the the simple yet wonderful of my past. .with my gang of friends and PBHP buddies..Only when I m with you all, thats my real self..Otherwise, I m just leading life without soul..I understand that we need a weapon to protect ourselves when embarking into the real society..But that's just too harsh for me..Or perhaps all these while I'm just too protected?Perhaps I have never come acrosss this before, that's y I find myself so depressing?Or perhaps thats's just part of life that we can't avoid??Or perhaps what?I don;t know....I have no idea...

I need to go back to where I come from..I need to have a sense of care and warmth..Otherwise I will really go crazy...The place here is too terrifying to me..What can I do besides persisting?

The offer from University Queensland perhaps just come at the right time that can cheer me up at this harsh time..Thanks..

Im sorryT.T

Im sorry...

I shouldnot reject..I should let you come and fetch me out though its ady late at night...

I should be serious to you when you tell me all your problems...I shouldnt be saying" u must be kidding I guess"

I should let u express all ur problem..I shouldnot let you out , driving alone..

You sign off, end my call...made me so worried..I dunno what should I do now..I feel so guilty..

I hope you will feel better after releasing all your sadness , anger and frustration. I know how tired is it after you paid so much effort on doing something.YEt the result didnt turn up to be the desired one..Plus the harsh words from ur loved ones..I understand it, I do experience that before..Life is not a bed of roses, isn't it? Only when we fall down once, we can be better the next time..B does not stand for BAD, it indicates that you still hv rooms for improvement..I knw the main problem is not on you, but from the one surrounded u..Perhaps they just feel disappointed, cos they care for u ..Else they wont even care ..Believe me, family is the power of love...Its the fact...you will get the endless care and warmth from them wherever you are...

I m really sorry..I feel so guilty...sorry...I hope you will be fine...

My first ever driving experience from PJ to Sunway

FInally I got the chance of driving in the this main city so called the most jam area in malaysia!

It has been two months plus I never been to my aunty's place due to the endless assignment and test. So, last Saturday after the account test, I decided to stay overnight there in PJ..Before going to the KTM station, I went to Subang Parade there to shop for my dear cousin"s birthday present which was actually in June.. But sadly I couldn't find anything nice.. So end up with nothing to her house..Thats why upon reaching there, I suggested to go somewhere with her to search for her present..and so coincidently that both of my aunt and uncle were not at home, so we two little kids decided to drive to Sunway.. and I m assigned to be the driver..haha..I guess I have to thank my cousin for being so confident about my driving skill..Note that I have never driven here...Never..haha

It was no doubt that I felt extremely nervous the moment I got into my cousin brother"s car. Yet I had to pretend to be a bit professional in front of her..haha..I even needed her to remind me of wearing the seat belt and adjusting the handbrake..haha..That proved that I was super nervous..haha..Luckily, with her help to show me the way, we reached Sunway safely!! Guess what!! Cos it was Saturday, all the car park was full! we turned and turned, keep searching and searching..and finally ended up to park our car at the highest level CP7..haha...

In the highest level of carpark CP7 , Sunway!!haha...
Searching in the parking lots..Got no choice but to wear the spec..my short-sightedness is getting serious now..
Photo session after shopped for nearly four hours...^^
My lovely cousin..
well, as a proof that I really went to Sunway..haha
Ready to go bac..NIce sunset view..
The car key..haha

In conclusion, although my intention was to buy my cousin present, but it ended up to buy nothing at the end..haha..We shared a bowl of laksa there instead..haha...
An unforgettable driving experince..Thanks for fulfilling my dream..I always think that can only drive the moment when I start working..haha

Bank Negara Pre-Departure Camp

A five day Pre-departure camp in Lanai Kijang with all the bank scholars....I guess pictures can describe more than I do^^

We were so excited about the camp as if we already finished the final exam.. Each one with few luggages ...


Reached the destination..Lanai Kijang!!
Welcoming drinks...nice orange juice!!
Our awesome sharing room...with Fan wai as my roomate...^^the bed is even nicer than my house's one..haha
plasma tv!! I wish I have such table in Casa...
Obviously it's the toilet..nono..is a grand toilet..haha...Equipped with the hairdryer, all types of shampoo, conditioner..etc..haha....
This can be considered as a small living room ..but sadly I didnt even lie down on the sofa throughout the 5 days...too busy plus the econ research !!haiz...
The swimming pool...but i will never go near there...I guess I will get drowned there..haha..
This is the gym!! I have never go for gym throughout my life..It's equipped with all sorts of sports facilities... so cool man!! and..there is a sauna there!!! we were really like going for vacation!!of course no pictures to show how much did we enjoy in the sauna there...all those sexy photo!!haha..I will never forget how hot was it inside the sauna and steaming room there...haha..an unforgettable experience...
Enjoyinig our buffet style meals in cafeteria..The food is so so so so so nice!!I miss the omelette so much!!I have tried so many different types of drinks, dessert and food..The feeling was so great as I finally can have some food other than those being sold in Asia Cafe..haha...my Pimples even popped out after coming back..haha.but i guess its worth it..haha
A visit to Kilang wang negara malaysia. We are the lucky group as they dont simply allow people to visit there..Had to go through the frisking room to make sure that we didnt take out any coins from the kilang..haha..Even the spoilt coin was not allowed to be taken by us..This was the first ever time I witnessed so many coins lie in front of me!! and till now only I know that actually malaysia produces lots of coins daily!!is really lots!!!
More photos will be uploaded...To be continued...

No sense of belongings

Feeling extremely no sense of belongings..I may look happy from a outsider viewpoint but deep inside my heart I feel so left out...

Have been calling mum n yeeche yesterday late at night to cry out all my frustrations and depression..I knw that you all will be getting more worried if i cry through phone. But i just wish to do that. I cant store that inside my heart anymore.. I have to release it out...I feel better after crying out..

I doubt myself..I wish to search back the real soul of myself..BUt I couldn't..I wonder how long such life will be...

I wanna go back to TI....i miss eveything there!!!