mini-crisis

first thing this morning Em got into the kitchen, pulled out a full 64 ounce jug of canola oil, and ran off, dumping the whole thing on our hallway carpet.

So, our day had a bumpy start. Horn couldn't make it to work, having instead to call cleaners and meet a carpet guy here. the kids couldn't play in most of the house- we had to gate off the whole hallway, so no bedrooms or toy room today and until it's fixed. So they were bored.

The carpet is all pulled up now. It needs new padding and to be steam-cleaned again. May be a few days. It's costing us about $400. Very annoying.

Oh, and add the carpet guy to the growing list of folks who tell us our landlord is a shady character. It's amazing- people know him and freely warn us. and you know I don't care for him much (and QUIT letting yourself in and getting your mail at my house, Mr!). So even though this place has lots of positives, we're both feeling uneasy about staying. Well, also that fire thing was scary.
Maybe the rental or buying market will turn for the better soon.

yesterday

 

tummy

 night before last it occured ot me that M had never been on his belly, so we tried it out. He was calm and happy but got soon got tired and complained.








we're going on 3 days now where I feel I haven't even seen him. He's been sleeping soundly, waking just to be changed and fed and then right back down. We hold him in light sleep but if it's deep, we use the bassinet, and he sleeps very well there. Much improved over our other kids :) I remember trying over and over to convince Em to nap in it, and E, well he's the one who never heard of deep sleep and could only doze if he was latched on, so every last nap had to be in arms! Each one is so special and diferent!

So we've actually got a lot done at home lately, but it's wierd to have a newborn in the home who doens't insist on being held every moment. Of course, when he's awake, we're totally spellbound. He's such an angel! We wonder if his sleepiness is making up for his early arival. Amazingly, we can see him growing bigger already. Also amazingly, having this sweet new spirit in our home has made us both so happy, it seems to have actually increased our love for the "big kids". They're awesome too :)


Right now he's napping, the rest of the family is at the zoo, I got several important tasks done, and now I'm blogging and shopping online as my lunch cooks (pesto). When HorninF gets back Em will nap and he'll head in to the office for a bit. She had nightmares last night, poor thing :( 

Emergency!

At 3:00 am this morning, I got up to change Em's diaper. It was still 76 inside (warm day), so I chose to open the windows. There was another deer eating the garden below. I went back to bed. Shortly after closing my eyes, I thought I heard wind blowing through the trees. I wasn't expecting wind. Then it died down. Then it started again. Usually, I would have just gone back to sleep, but I felt the urge to get up and see what was happening. As I got to the hallway, I started to hear popping sounds, and then a soft boom. As I got to the window at the back of our house, I saw flames and embers flying (more like shooting) at least 100 feet in the air with a thick, ominous orange and black pillar of smoke ascending even farther up. I could hear people yelling. I grabbed the phone, dialed 944, then 944 again, then 911. "______ 911, are you calling about the fire?" Where we are located even a small fire within a half-mile or so means that you and your family get in the car and get far away as soon as possible, especially condsidering the hot, dry weather we've been having. I walked into the bedroom, said "We have to go, there's a big fire a few houses away." In 2 minutes we were all in the car. There were many others even faster than us driving away. I stopped to take some pictures. It doesn't show, but a high branch on a large tree was on fire, too. (See the face in the fire? Wierd.) We called some people we know who live near us and told them the situation. We drove around town for about an hour. When we ventured back, our street was blocked about 1/4 mile away by police and fire trucks. They said the fire was under control. Another hour later after driving around and sitting in parking lots we went back. The police officer said the road was closed because there were big hoses running across that we could not drive over. 20 minutes later (after going around), we were back in bed. This morning we went for a walk. At the scene (which was still smoking), someone told us a lady, the sole occupant of the house, had been cooking sausage when something caught fire, and the whole house was gone in 20 minutes.

It looks like two houses were destroyed, and about 20 trees were blackened. Bravo to the fire department. Had it been windy or the fire department been a few minutes slower, I don't think we'd have a house right now. 

Em and little brother

 
 
  

pictures today

Home this afternoon. So far M hasn't let me hold him this way, but HorninF was able to coax him into this ultra-cute position.



Here's a shot looking down on my lap at this very moment.

siblings adjusting

They say kids look huge when you bring a new baby home, but to me they're the same, except that Em's communciation skills seem advanced. But they look and act about as I remember. Not that I was gone long or anything.


Both are adjusting well, and we're giving lots of extra attention. HorninF has really taken over my usual job so I can focus on resting and the baby's needs. Yesterday grandma and grandpa came up and the kids had a really good time playing.

Both really love the baby. E is more obedient than Em about not bothering baby when he's sleeping, but she's just really interested in him and has less control, so she's likely to kiss or cuddle up in a less delicate way. she loves to ask about the baby, to watch him, and to bring him blankets. 

updates

so, what's up with us?

well, baby M is great. He's a real sleepyhead, and he just wakes to nurse a bit and drop off again. He sleeps best if we hold him but we also try to let him nap in the bassinet some. that's where he is now. He seems to only be alert about an hour in the evening and an hour during the night, Otherwise, he's sleeping.
He's really happy and quiet, but he cries some if we change his blanket or clothes, and he gets very loud if we change his diaper. His dislikes are hiccups, touching damp spots from spit-up, and being unswaddled.

HorninF is off work for some flexible amount of time. He gets 2 weeks paid, but really has to work from home even now, because nobody's quite covering for him. So there will be some work-at-home days and half-office days as we transition to a regular schedule again.
He'll be painting our piano all black tonight. finally!

Now that he's in charge of Em's nighttime needs, I think something will be changing. She still wakes a time or two, which is pretty unnecesary at her age, but I haven't cared enough to change that. But HorninF isn't used to it, and he's up earlier in the morning than me, so I think he'll find a way to transition her away from it. But we don't want to shake up her world any extra either, so we need to find some slow and gentle plan.

I feel great. Imediately after delivery all my awful pregnancy pains, soreness, and stiffness melted away. So that's quite a relief. I'm already forgetting how hard that was and feeling like pregnancy is something I'd possibly attempt again someday. Must be this amazing baby influencing me. He's perfect.

But of course I'm staying home and being careful not to overdo it now. I don't know when I'll ever go anywhere. I can't imagine taking baby out in the car, and then once he is bigger, it sounds so daunting to take all 3 out once Horn is back at work. I try to remember I'll have a doubel stroller and I've got my strength back to carry/slign either baby now too. But buckling 3 kids in every time we stop? not attractive. Plus, at least 1 (Em) is a guarenteed crier on any ride greater than 10 minutes.

I'm getting more sleep now. Also we've received some fabulous dinners lately, it's been a real treat. The afterpains were better this time because knowing they were murderous before, I insisted on adequate pain meds ahead of time. Nursing is going well, though I think my body seriously overestimated what he'd need. but that will straighten out.

I mentioned being dissatisfied with my hospital (though the birth part went well and my midwife was wonderful). I'm not sure what I should have done diferently. Maybe driven up to Sutter Davis (great care, but we didn't know we could have made it). Maybe not wirtten off these guys so fast for fear of San Fransisco traffic. It doesn't matter now (can't change it, not needing a new plan anytime soon), but analyzing decisions and learning from them is important, right?

naming

So our amazing, sweet, soft little boy does have a name.
He's *********

for about a day we called him Noah James, but it just didn't fit. we couldn't get used to it, I couldn't remember it, I'd look down at him and think ****** and get stuck trying to remember what I was supposed to be calling him.

So Noah is a nice name, but not for him. Also, it's getting way popular . More popular than E's name in any recent year, and Em's doesn't even make the top 1000. In 2005 Noah was right in there by James and John, way above Thomas and Luke and Isaac.
Ok, that's a real tangent :)

Anyway, he's a great baby and we got this all worked out relatively early, the hospital hadn't sent off the birth certificate yet so it was easy for Horn to go down and change it.

oh, and ****** is a family name, and Horn's middle name

and I'll have to edit all the details from this post in a week or so :)

birth story

So here is the birth story! names/places edited out, and not shortened any for blog purposes. I'll edit it later for permanent babybook purposes but the goal tonight was just to get as much down as possible, from memory and our notes.

It's getting late- I think the naming and "about us" updates will have to come in the morning. sorry!


Tuesday at 4 I had my 38-week midwife checkup. I had gained 46 pounds, my blood pressure was my usual 100/60. I had been increasingly uncomfortable and limited in my daily activities for a couple months and was counting the days to delivery, though I expected the baby would come late like Em had. The midwife mentioned the next day was a great one to give birth, because she had no office hours and could really be there for me. Being so frustrated with my physical limitations in pregnancy I asked her to strip my membranes, hoping that would trigger something. She did, and surprisingly this took about 10 minutes, including her doing some reflexology massage and guiding my deep breathing. So it was nothing like the brief maneuver I expected. At the end I was dilated to 3cm, and I drove home, feeling about the same. At 7 we put the kids to bed and I began to feel cramping. It was a light sensation, not painful, but faint cramping that came and went, lasting maybe 20 or 30 seconds each. I started timing the sensations and noticed they were regular and 4 or 5 minutes apart. This was interesting, but not too exciting, since cramps are a common side effect of the stripped membranes ( a procedure which has a 50-50 chance of labor within 24 hours, IF you’re full term and your body was ready anyway). So the cramping may not have been meaningful. At 9:30 we decided to go to sleep, and we’d have our verdict- either they’d go away, or they’d strengthen overnight.

At 4:30 I was awakened by a stronger contraction. I got up and timed a couple (3-4 minutes apart), and then I called my parents and told them to drive up to tend the kids because there was a good chance this would be real labor now, and we needed to be free to leave the house without worrying about the childcare situation. Then I woke HorninF. We got up, got some things together, he called in to work. He called the midwife who wanted us to come in immediately. E woke up and began talking to us from his sleeping spot. These contractions were clearly “it” but were still easy to cope with if I was standing up. They hurt more if I sat or laid down, but standing and swaying they were no problem at all. At 6 my parents arrived and after brief instructions, we left for the hospital at 6:15, arriving there at 6:30.

X is a busy urban hospital, delivering an average of 20 something babies a day. We are arriving as they prepared for six scheduled cesareans, and the floor is noisy and bright. Luckily the midwife has expedited us through their check-in beurcracy and we skip the “triage” room to go right to an L&D room, where I get IV antibiotics and unexpectedly HornInF feels very faint seeing the IV. I am 4 centimeters dilated at 7AM and at 7:15 we put on the fetal monitor strips. The contractions are painful but still reasonable as long as I stand and sway through them. In between I am still relaxed and happy, feeling excited about the baby, but they are hurting more and more. I worry that the anesthesiologists will soon be stuck in operating rooms for all those morning cesareans, if they’re not already, and this is my chance ask for an epidural before things become unbearable. Surprisingly, the anestisiologist arrived quickly, at 8:15. He got me set up and pain free faster than expected (usually, deciding on an epidural means a half hour of IV fluids, plus waiting for the Dr, plus his work time, plus another half hour for drugs to take effect.) So, I was comfortable, pain-free, and excited about the baby. I could still move my legs and feet and change positions on the bed without help. Only 2 hours after the birth, I was able to walk around as normal. So it was a good epidural.

At 8:45 a nurse checked me and said I was 5 or 6 centimeters. At 10:30, I was 6 or 7. At 12:10 I was 8-9, and the midwife predicted the baby would be born within the hour, maybe half that. But it wasn’t quite that fast- soon I was complete, but with a rim of cervix left, and she worked to fix that so I could get tp pushing. Pushing last time had taken just one try, so we were expecting a quick task. But this baby moved down much slower. She realized that my pushing contractions were very short- lasting no more than 20 seconds, and she worried my uterus was tiring out, risking hemorrhage like in E’s birth. So I got some pitocin, which strengthens contractions and prevents hemorrhage (Pitocin is what stopped it last time, when lesser interventions had failed. Even homebirth midwives carry pitocin for this reason, though it is more commonly known for artificial labor induction purposes)
Anyway, I continued pushing for about a half hour before baby shocked us all by being born face-up! He sputtered and cried before his body was even born. This position explains his slower arrival, both in the labor’s total length and the pushing time. The midwife put him on my belly and nurses helped towel him off. He was especially goopy and had lots of bubbles and mucus in his mouth. One eye was stuck shut. He was bright pink with dark hair and scrawny legs. I needed only one stitch for a “little skin tear”

He was 8 pounds and half an ounce and 20.86 inches
He wouldn’t open his mouth to nurse until he was 12 hours old, but once he did, that went fine.

Because he was born at 1PM, and we weren’t ready (or rather, persistent enough) to check out that evening, we had to spend the night. We came home at 9:30 the next morning.

I have a hundred complaints about the hospital experience. Loved my midwife, loved our pediatrician, got a really good epidural, just as I wanted. But all the other hospital baggage- the noise, the nurses, the paperwork, the patronizing and micromanaging attitudes, just the beurocracy of it all, was SO annoying, SO frustrating. I’ve kept all my gripes out of the birth story. I suppose they deserve their own story in a journal somewhere. But I’m trying to let them all go so they don’t become part of his birth story.

3 babies

These are all about 3 days old


this is Em in 2005














this is our new little guy who doens't yet have a blog pseudonym



















And this is little E
 

first photos

getting dressed to come home. This is the same outfit we took E and Em home in. It's soft, gender-neutral, and cord-friendly.











sleeping in the bassinet at home, about 24 hours old

















this photo is yesterday, so he is 2 days old.



















these flowers came from Horn's company. I've never recieved such a large arrangement! they almost touch the ceiling.
 

baby name

hey, stop the presses!
the name is up in the air again. we'll keep you posted!

(and we will be posting it on the blog once, but then we'll delete it once everybody has seen and he'll get a codename too)

hey!

hey everybody, we're home wiht a baby now!
more to follow later today, we just got in.

tuesday night

so here's what I look like lately.
had my 38 week midwife appt today. I'm up to 46 pounds now, and dialted another centimeter.
I've been having light contractions every 4 minutes for a couple hours now. So, it could be something. or not. they're really easy. we'll see.


 

anniversary

So, today is our 8-year dating anniversary. On 9/19/1998 we went to the movies. twice.

here's some photos for you



Prom (May 1999)









summer 1999? guessing from my car and work uniform













This is sometime in the my apartment between the dorms and the married student housing, and I've got the virgin Mary necklace on, and the photo is with my Intel camera so it must be the first half of 2001.

 

unpacked

you may recall I mentioned that we unpacked all the 0-12 month baby clothes. Well, here they are. The kids think it's great fun to move the pile (on the bed, by the bed, scattered, etc) especially since there are a few infant toys in the mix.

whatever! :) well, as long as they clean them back up when they're done!

 


  

trainmaster

  2 weeks ago grandma and grandpa came to our house and had an outing to the nearby little steam train. they bought hats for the kids (that photo is just yesterday). anyway, they love their hats, and E even wore his for a field trip to the Railroad Museum this week. 
I don't know if you heard, but he wants to be a trainmaster someday. Not an engineer, not a conductor. The trainmaster.

the mechanic

So, E is really cute lately because he wants to talk to Em all dya long. He'll ask her all sorts of questions and he's so delighted that she says yes or no to them, especially when he can get her to say something silly, like that she's a boy. He also just likes to tell her what's happening.


So, yesterday morning HorninF was getting ready in the bathroom, and the kids were hovering outside the door. Eli heard him shaving and explained to Em that "daddy needs to shave all his wiskers, because if he grows a beard, mom will just run away with the mechanic!"
(E knows Horn needs to shave because I hate the alternative)
I heard the "run off with the mechanic" bit and lagughed in the kitchen. I asked him what the mechanic would do, and he said "he'll just take dad's beard right off!"
I guess that's because mechanics fix things?

visitors

so, the other day, HornInF came and woke me up early. While getting ready for work, he heard little sounds outside. Looking down out the windows, he spotted deer in the backyard! Together we watched them. I wish I had glasses- without my lenses in, I just say shadowy blurs. But we got a close view of FOUR deer totally devouring the garden below us. 2 adults and 2 little ones- isn't it cool how deer travel in families?

In the 10 weeks or so we've lived here, I've seen deer on the nearby roads twice, and Horn once, I think. And yeah, the garden is pretty destroyed, they ate the leaves off everything they could. We also get gophers here. and squirrels and birds. That's all the wildlife I've seen.

preg update

before the update: hey, we need boy first names. our "short list" is too short. any tips, please post. rules:
1) must be a real name- something anybody could pronounce and recognize
2) Less common is better


so, this baby is due 3 weeks from yesterday. Of course, I meant to post it yesterday, but oh well.
So, I'm just trying to hang on! Trying to sit and lay down as much as I can, because being up (walking or standing still) hurts quickly. The midwife this week tried to assure me it could be any time now. but I don't believe her :) The others weren't early.
Anyway, he isn't breech anymore. And I'm dilating early again. I've gained 40 pounds now (30 for E and 35 for Em, I think. I started lower this time.)

Last night I finally wrote Em's birth story out, using notes from that day. It actually helped releive some anxiety about this next one. It doesn't sound so bad from the notes.

also, we brought out all the baby clothes last night (and some packed up infnat toys and diapers), and reorganized the storage bins as we did it. So we're ready. well, except there's no dresser to put all these clothes in! but at least they're out. And the hospital bag is packed.

free museum day!

got this in my inbox. plenty of good choices near us- check your state and print passes too!


************************************

On September 30, 2006, for one day only, museums across the country
will join the Smithsonian Institution in its long-standing tradition of
offering free admission to visitors.

To participate you must download the Free Museum Day card from the
Smithsonian website here:

http://www.smithsonianmag.com/museumday/articles/what-is.php

If that link wraps for some reason go to the main site here:

http://www.smithsonianmag.com/museumday/

and then click on "What is Museum Day?" from the menu.

Sundays

So, one really good piece of news it that Em is 18 months old now, so she qualifies for the church nursery. That means we don't have to chase her through the halls anymore, so we get to 1)rest 2)actually listen
and it means she's not bored, but surounded by kids and toys and they do a snack (and songs?). So it's cool.

I think Horn has abandoned the blog, at least as a writer. So I'll share his news. He was just called to be the Sunday School president. I think it's a really good fit for him.

kids at home

So, last week at home was fabulous. Both kids were so nice, the days passed easily by. I couldn't get out and do much but it didn't matter because everybody was happy here.
Then this weekend E was a bit crazy both days, and that was wierd. And today he seems calm and happy again. Em is fine as usual, though she has a new runny nose and is a bit crabby, so maybe that will turn into somehitng. but no big deal.

I'm reminded of 2 things today that I *really* need to get written down for posterity before memory fades any more. I still haven't recorded Em's birth story, or my Septmeber 11th story. both of which I imagine the kids/grandkids or my elderly self would someday find interesting. Ideally, I'd get both finally done tonight.

E is very into his puzzles lately. He's got his US map one, and then a bunch of 20-30 peice things. He likes to multi-task, dumping out several sets at once and then doing one puzzle at a time from that pile of peices. That's what he's quietly working on now, and most mornings lately.

He also watches Semsame street again, now that we have TV. But for some reason he doens't want his Thomas the train videos. the reason? I can only assume it's because I stopped getting scratched library copies and finally bought a used set (6 for $30). He won't watch the darn things now that I put out the money for them!

I want to find him some activities/clsses in the community, but it's been too busy for me to look into that yet, and besides, it's hard to know how much I can realistically commit to transporting him to in the imediate future.

links lately

for Micah and Austin.
TIME last week on how very common it is to belive alternative 9/11 theories. I had no idea it was this nomral :)



several homeschooling links came up at once, so I'll pass them on. Don't know if anybody is intersted in the topic... I'll order the links by legnth. I don't really feel like wheighing in, just passing on the food for thought.

problems of schooling per se
Stanford magazine about their HS admitions.

Oh, that reminds me, I hear that my bro just got his official "nay" from Harvard.

long and thorough blog discussion


link
so, this is sorta related to my friend's experience, but not really. I mean, almost not enough that I'm comfortable implying it is related at all! But I think it's the same ballpark, anyway. So I wanted to pass it on, the discussion is interesting (follow that link to the origional "Daring young mom" posting.)

Jon Stewart

I mentioned this Daily Show segment once logn ago. Coincidently found a link today, so here's the clip. Maybe more links to come... ?

http://www.comedycentral.com/sitewide/media_player/play.jhtml?itemId=59182

Articles of Faith: Update

E has been learning. He now knows 4 -7.

4. We believe that the first principle and ordinances or the Gospel are: first, faith in the Lord Jesus Christ; second, repentance; third, baptism by immersion for the remission of sins; fourth, laying on of hands for the gift of the Holy Ghost.

5. We believe in the same organization that existed in the primitive church, namely, apostles, prophets, pastors, teachers, evangelists, and so forth.

6. We believe that a man must be called of God by prophecy and by the laying on of hands by those who are in authority to preach the Gospel and administer in the ordinances thereof.

7. We believe in the gift of tongues, prophecy, revelation, visions, healing, interpretation of tongues, and so forth.

Among other things, he's discovered jigsaw puzzles, and likes them.

reading

this is worth reading

part 1
part 2
part 3
part 4
part 5

Friday again

Today's weather is wierd, in a cozy fall way. It's 50s, very cloudy and dark and lots of wind.

Yesterday I felt physically better than I'd been in a long time. We had a friend over that morning, and then Em napped short enough to allow us to attend a "not back to school picnic" at a grassy park on the water. E had an awesome time playing with tons of kids- chasing in the grass, climbing trees, pretned play in the sand (vollyball court). and it was right on the bay, and E got to stomp around in the water a bit too. He was so happy. Em had to be carried the whole time. Afterwards, we had to stop by the town's trader joe's.

So, a nice day of friends and playtime, and we got to go to an outing I'd ordinarily not have felt up for.

So, we got home and I could barely waddle in the house- good thing Horn was there to take the kids and groceries! I layed down 2 hours becuase it hurt to move- turns out I hurt my lower back pretty well from carrying Em, plus my usual hip/pelvis/leg trouble probably just from having gone out anywhere. That's kinda a daily problem, always better in the morning. the back trouble was new- I havent carried Em like that in months, but i had to- the beach wasn't safe for her, the picnic food wasn't safe from her, and I coudln't otherwise keep both kids under my supervision in such a large park.

anyway, some tylenol helped, and I was able to get up and stretch and shower and feel a bit better. today I'm feeling normal, whatever that is, and of course I'm rememering not to overdo it.

books again

So, the good news is that my amazon shopping cart (well past 50 books in there!) has a whole bunch of overlapping with the new libary system. I haven't been read much lately, but I've put in a bunch of hold requests so soon I'll have many coming in that have been on my list for a long time. I should read more.


books read since last time:

A Midwife's Tale: The Life of Martha Ballard, Based on Her Diary, 1785-1812
Admitedly boring at first, very interesting by the end. The point was to learn about life and women of the time. So, it worked. It's set in Maine, she is between 50 and 80 in these years. Neat insights into economy, social order, marriage, sexuality in that time and place.


Mothering Without A Map: The Search for the Good Mother Within
highly recomend. not about motheirng or parenting at all- I wish it had a diferent title. It's about being who you wnat to be when you haven't had a perfect role model to follow, so that's just about all of us. In the author's case, her mom died when she was 4 and so her crisis was feeling she hadn't seen how to be a good mom. but it applies to everbody who is trying to "do better" in any arena.


how she really does it
not bad but not worthwhile

Trading up
exactly something I'd normally like reading but boring and poorly written.

artista

So the other day we had some friends over and everybody was playing out front. Of course, Em was quiet for a while and went missing. She returned wielding a permanent marker.


I'd taken down the kitchen gate during her nap and for the first time, not put it right back up, and the pen was kept in an unlocked drawer.

So she ran outside with the marker, and marks on her clothing, arms and legs. On closer inspection, I found this huge scribble on her belly.

Indoors, she also got the computer desk, chair, and kitchen floor. but luckily no walls or carpet! 

train set

So the trainset I ordered finally arrived today. E's known it's coming for a couple weeks now, but it was on backorder. He was so happy!




















Horn set it up- note the turntable, roundhouse and cranes. It's a really good quality set. E played with it until dinner, and once they were in bed, Horn glued it down.