Morgan's first birthday....it came on Friday, January 22, and it was so very bittersweet. I know I sound like a broken record you've heard from every other mother about their child, but I honestly cannot believe it has been one year since I gave birth to her. Last night I looked back through my sonogram pictures and it is amazing to know that tiny structure in the picture is my beautiful, big personality, happy baby girl. We have come so far and are forever blessed to know and love such a sweet baby. Before we were pregnant I always knew I wanted children and I wanted to be a "mom." However, I think in my head I just thought of keeping a schedule, getting to buy cute baby clothes, decorating a nursery, etc. I never in my wildest dreams could have imagined what it would become instead. Christ tells us that to follow Him is to deny ourselves and take up our cross. In a lot of ways, motherhood is the same. You completely devote yourself to meeting a little person's every need. You will go above and beyond anything and everything to make sure they are happy and taken care of. You easily forget your own wants and needs. Now I'm not saying you should just let yourself go and forget that you are first a follower of Christ and secondly a wife. In fact, those priorities will deserve more of your attention and effort. One thing I didn't see coming was how having Morgan would change my prayer life. A good friend of mine challenged me to always pray over Mo each night before I put her down. Now this has become the time of day I look forward to the most. God will definitely stir your heart as you sit and pray over your child. One of my biggest prayers aside from Morgan coming to know Christ at an early age is that my walk would in no way hinder her salvation, but instead I could be an example and leader for her. God gives us that responsibility as a parent and each day I want to be better at it than the day before.
Ultimately, having this much love for a child is a huge reminder of how much Christ loves us. I know that I can take my love and multiply it by a million and it still wouldn't reach the level of love He has for His children. Morgan's hands are one of my favorite things to look at. Every time I play with her little fingers I am reminded that God spent His precious time forming those and wants her to use them daily to further His kingdom. In a sense, everything I think about with Morgan is a challenge to myself and to my walk. Funny how God can use even a one year old to affect an adult.
Sorry to go so deep, but as you can imagine I've done a lot of "remembering and reflecting"this past week. Yes I cried a lot the week of her birthday, but the good news is I got it all out so I could actually enjoy the day of. We had such a fun birthday party and are so grateful our good friends and family could be there to celebrate. We love you Mo!!
