@%@$!#&!#^&^

You know when life sneaks up on you, and you have not one spare second to yourself? Like, not even a second to come up with a witty title for your post?

That's what my life is like right now.

I have no shopping done.
My tree is still not up.
Cards? Forget it.
Baking? See above.
I still need to make a list for my mom before she has a hernia.
Work is piling up and only 6.5 working days left before the holidays.
I leave for Vegas in 15 days and still need to shop.
There are a million other things that I need to do...but my brain has ceased functioning so I have no idea what they are.

I'm thinking it would help if I actually slept either:
at my own place
-or-
at my own place by myself.

MG#2 is still in the picture, moreso than ever. It still freaks me out, but for now, it is what it is. I like him. A lot. He knows this. I know how he feels, too. So for the time being, we'll continue along in our little whirlwind because, frankly, I don't have the time to do it differently.

I hope your holiday seasons are rolling along nicely!
Updates soon, I promise!

YAY! or NAY

YAY - waking up to a lovely white blanket of snow!
NAY - walking to work in cold, blustery, blowing snow

YAY - being nuzzled awake while being small spoon!
NAY - difficult conversations later in the day

YAY - having car started and brushed off for me!
NAY - having to re-brush off car due to cold, blustery, blowing snow

YAY - finally finishing two month old project!
NAY - starting new project tomorrow

YAY - no evening plans for the first time in weeks!
NAY - must clean and do above mentioned weeks' work of laundry

YAY - new sparkly party shoes for the weekend!
NAY - four inch heels that will probably end up in drunken injured ankles or landing on ass

YAY - open bar Christmas party this weekend!
NAY - waking up with raging hangover

YAY - being done work in fifteen minutes!
NAY - walking home in cold, blustery, blowing snow

Snippet

"How do I look today?"

"Cute. Like always."

"Good answer!"

"It's true!"

"I know."

"Smartass."

F-word

Well, that dirty little word has been finally been uttered. The word that messes everything up and complicates the shit out of everything. That damn F word.

Yup, you know the one. Feelings.

Friday night, after a few (dozen) drinks, MG#2 and I got to chatting, and everything was put out right there on the table for all to see. He's falling, I'm falling, it's just a big old tumble to gawd knows where. It scares me, because now that it's been mentioned, the whole dynamic changes. Yet on the same hand, being a girl, a girl who has been known to have pretty strong emotions, it gives me butterflies and makes my eyes sparkle. No matter how hard I fight it this time around, it's a fluttery, sparkly, lose-your-breath kinda combo.

I can sit here and say that I am going to be careful, that I can't handle getting hurt like that again...but I'll be lying to both myself and to you. I've tried to not throw caution to the wind this time around, what with all the baggage and all, but it's been pretty frigging hard not to. We have such a great time together and the attraction is....well, let's just say it's REALLY strong.

The best part about it is that this whole F word thing has been discussed numerous times since our drunkfest...which makes it all that more difficult to act like it's not been mentioned. The tone of our conversations have changed, there's a lot more smoldery type eye contact, everything feels electric and warm and smooshy. (Ugh, I think I just threw up in my mouth a little).

I do not want to get hurt again, because there's still a chance that that's what may happen...but I'll be damned if I am going to sit here and not let any of this happen just because there's possible heartbreak in my future. I'm just not that type of person. When I feel strongly about something or someone, that's it, that's all. It takes a heck of a lot to change that.

So, I'll just fasten my seat belt and see where we go from here.

It's part of my charm

It's Friday afternoon, I am burnt out, and am (im)patiently counting down the minutes until happy hour and cute boys. Also, it seems as if everyone else is doing this right now, so I'm jumping on the wagon!

Without further ado, a list of things, about me, that are odd/strange/kooky:

• I will not eat warm pizza. If I am out somewhere, and pizza is ordered, I will take a few pieces, throw them on a plate, and put them in the freezer until they have cooled off.
• I HATE having unpainted toenails. I cannot remember a time that I have ever worn them “naked”. It drives me absolutely bat-shit crazy.
• I am very superstitious about knocking on wood when bad thoughts cross through my mind. If there is no wood around, I will knock on my head. I guess maybe because sometimes it feel as if it’s hollow??
• I am like Rainman when it comes to remembering phone numbers. I can remember every phone number I’ve ever had, as well as most everyone else’s.
• Same goes for birthdays. If you’ve told me when your birthday is, I will not forget it.
• When I find myself eating McDonald’s French fries, I will only eat the “soft” ones…the ones that are kinda squishy to the touch and will bend when dipped. Also, I will not eat them unless they are dipped in McDonald’s sweet and sour sauce.
• I snort when I laugh. Quiet little ones if it’s only kind of funny, but full on, piggy snorts if I find something hilarious.
• I have naturally curly hair…really curly…and I straighten it. Every. Frigging. Day.
• I hate, hate, hate talking on the phone with people who I don’t know REALLY well. I would much rather e-mail or text you. However, those that I know really well, I will talk to for hours.
• I will not wear thong underwear. I continue to buy them in hopes that I’ll find a comfortable pair, but as of yet, no dice.
• I eat pickles almost every single day. The best ones I have had to date are from a little deli in the food court at Granville Island in Vancouver. Mmmmm.


I’m sure there’s more, but my brain is mush…and it’s still two hours til happy hour. Ugh.

Enjoy your weekends!

Dear Santa,

I've been a good girl. I swear.

It's all in the numbers

1: number of times the little man peed on my brand new blanket. Asshole.

2: number of times I have hung out with Building Guy since my last post. He's very nice and very cute...but if you keep reading you'll see my priorities are totally out of whack.

3: number of times I have hung out with MG#2 since my last post...it is now a proven fact that we are officially HORRIBLE at "breaking up"

4: number of movies I watched over the course of two days (Evan Almighty; Mr Brooks; In the Land of Women; Perfect Stranger)

5: number of sneezes in a row. Isn't that like the equivalent of an orgasm or something?

6: average number of hours that I was awake per day, Friday through Sunday...my cold hit full force

7: doses of NeoCitran Warming Relief

8: pairs of shoes I have tried on to go with my Christmas party dress...none have been winners

15: number of hours I slept Thursday night/Friday morning

40: number of sleeps until my 29th birthday

56: points scored by the Patriots during Sunday Night Football (I'm just getting into NFL, but seriously...these guys are F-ing good)

18,937: number of Kleenexes I've gone through...or it feels that way at any rate

Cold Induced Ramblings

I started at the gym again this week after getting the go ahead from my physiotherapist. I joined at my brother's gym so that we could go together and he could motivate me. Problem is, there are hot guys EVERYWHERE. I need to get a shirt made that say "He's My Brother".

I am fighting a cold, and it sucks donkey balls. I want my mom to make me Jell-O and bring me juice in bed.

I'm going for a drink with Building Crush in T-minus one hour. I am nervous...and I look like shit. Am finding it hard to muster up some energy to make it through. Stupid cold.

I hung out with MG#2 last night. I'm pretty sure that I like him more than I should. Also, we are really, really bad at "breaking up".

There is nothing better than morning snuggles from my four-legged little man.

My appetite had been non-existent for weeks now. Great for weight loss, but I wanna frigging eat!!!

I am booked for Vegas for my birthday and New Year's. I am so excited I can barely stand it!

I have started sneaking smokes again. Started out just when I was drinking, but it's progressed to one or two during the day. Must. Stop. Now.

I have about two weeks worth of shows waiting for me on my PVR. I think I just planned my weekend.

I'm wondering if it's possible to overdose on echinacea?

I love being there for my friends when they need me most.

I bought a new down filled throw from Costco yesterday. It is ultra-mink. I'd never heard of it before, but am pretty sure it is my new favorite thing in the entire world. If I could, I would walk around naked for the rest of my life wrapped in nothing but this blanket. It's that good.

I have been listening to the same IPod playlist on repeat for the past week.

Is this day over yet?

Baggage Claim

Most days, I don't know which way is up. The past few days have been no exception.

Fireman has been constantly calling and texting...he's been really sweet and seems to be making a huge effort for us to spend time together, but I just don't think I can go there again. It's almost as if he's realized what a mistake he's made and is trying to win me back. It's sweet to see, but I think it's the classic case of too little, too late. You had me, you could have kept me, but you lied to me, and in my world, that just doesn't fly.

On the other hand, MG#2, who I've been spending quite a bit of time with, has been nothing but honest with me from the beginning. He's dealing with some relationship issues of his own, which I've been privy to from the very beginning, and we admittedly got involved when we shouldn't have. Yet, sometimes, things like that just don't matter. Whatever it is that we have between us, it just works. We have great chemistry, we have a ton of fun when we're together, and I am so attracted to him I can barely stand it sometimes. He's told me that the feeling is very mutual. Heh.

Yes, here comes the "BUT"...emotions are starting to be involved, and right now, that's a hard pill to swallow. We decided on the weekend that it's probably for the best if we don't see each other anymore, that things need to be sorted out if there's ever a chance for anything to happen between us. Right now, we don't know if there even is that chance in a long term sense. After an hour long chat of where things were, we "broke up", pegging it as a temporary hiatus. It was a very mature conversation, which is a nice refresher for me after the last couple of guys who just decide that it's easier to run away from it all. We peppered our chat with goofy jokes to lighten the mood, but the overall sadness of it all prevailed. I didn't realize just how sad I was until I closed the door behind me and the tears were just...there. Big, shiny alligator tears, accompanied by broken little sobs, made it difficult for me to see through the windshield into the cold night.

After tossing and turning for a few hours, I fell into a restless sleep, but woke knowing that it was for the best. The baggage involved, while always a burden, is even heavier when it's still unwashed and full of sand from the previous trip.

Transformation - Part Deux

Soo....Building Crush shows up at the table, and we get to chatting. He tells me that I look familiar, and I play dumb, knowing full well where it is that we know one another from. We finally "figure out" that we know each other from our previous building, and he mentions that he always wondered where I'd gone. (wheeeee!)

We chat for a bit more, with him asking all the right questions and throwing out some answers of his own that keep me interested. Last call hits, the lights go on, and it's time for me to grab BG and head home. As I'm putting on my coat, he leans in and asks ever so cutely if he can have my number, and I gladly oblige.

The following Monday, someone that knows Building Crush e-mails BG asking if a girl named Miss Pickle had picked her up from the bar on Saturday night, so I guess he was checking it out (more whee!) as I don't have my name on my voicemail.

Wednesday (yes, he waited the three days to call, which is kind of stupid, but whatever) he called, leaving a message and saying that he was really glad that he'd ran into me. (wheee again!)

As it sits right now, after a few calls and e-mails, we're headed out for drinks on Thursday after work. I'm both nervous and excited!
I could really use a good date after the weekend I had...and let's just hope that he has a hell of a lot less baggage than the last two!

Transformation

From the looks of it, this here little space of mine is quickly transforming into a dating blog.
I guess that's to be expected when that's kind of been the majority of my life as of late...and then when making the decision to post every day for the month, it goes without saying that I'm going to be talking about boys/dating/stupidity a lot.

Wow, that was a mouthful.

Anyhoo...this week's been a gooder when it comes to boys and dating. You've already heard about MG#2 in the posts below. What I haven't yet told you about is running into my old building crush from a few years back.

We used to work in the same building, and I would do absolutely nothing but admire him from afar. There were two reasons for this...one, I thought he was far too cute to even give me a second glance, and two, I was in a committed relationship at the time. So for a few years, I would swoon whenever we'd get on the same elevator or pass each other in the food court. Then, one day, he was gone.

Fast forward to last Saturday night...I had ventured to the bar to pick up Best Girlfriend as I had been a good girl and stayed sober all night. I walk in, and it's a gong show. Everyone's loaded, I am sober, but it's all good. I catch sight of one of the guys who had been whooping it up with us the previous weekend, so I mosey on up to his table to snag a seat and watch the drunken antics. He's by himself, but there are two beers on the table, and he explains that his friend is just in the washroom. We chat for a second, and his friend comes back to the table. Imagine my excitement when it turns out to be Building Crush!!

I hate to do this, but my ride is waiting...so this will have...

...to be continued....

Good day, ma'am!

Life has been a bit of a rollercoaster when it comes to my heart lately. A really big ass, mother honkin' rollercoaster with sudden drops and twists and moments where you think your stomach is just gonna drop to your knees and then come right back up again.

I never know at the beginning of each day what is going to happen, or how things are going to turn out, yet I always start it out with a big ol' grin and a grain of salt.
Most days end up the same way that they start, but in between there are many ups and downs.

Today, though, has been the exception. Lots of ups, and not one down that I can think of (I swear to you, I'd better not be jinxing myself by saying that!! You hear me, powers that be?!?!)

It started out with a nice little text from MB#2 "Rumor has it that if u r ready in 20 u get a free ride to work today...good morning", followed by a quick visit over breakfast. Lots of progress made at work, an e-mail from a friend long out of touch, a great visit with my physiotherapist telling me that I am A-OK to start working out again after the accident. Add to that an e-mail thanking me "more than anything, for being a friend lately...I have really needed it" and telling me that I am "kinda cool!"

How can a girl not be smiling after that? I'll tell ya...it just doesn't happen.

Friends of a feather

I'm being all schmoopy today, thinking of the choices I make in my life, and the friends that are beside me as I make them.
Recently, I've made some doozies, and one friend in particular has been the one to reel me back in when I insist on continuing down the wrong path, even when she was the one to warn me against it at the very start. Without her, I would be much less of a person.

Dearest J,

You've seen me through some pretty rough situations in the time we've known one another, just as I have for you. You are both the angel on my shoulder, whispering in my ear to "not go there!", as well as the devil on the other side, egging me on to have just one more Jagerbomb and make out with that cute guy in the corner.

You have seen me laugh and laughed loudly along with me.
You have seen me cry and then helped me dry my tears.
You have seen me fall while pointing and laughing.
You have been the one to grab my hand and help me stand back up, time and time again.
You are the first one that I call when things go sideways, and you are the first one that I call when there's a need for the wheels to fall off.

We've been through boys who have not been even close to deserving of our giving natures, yet we stayed on just to make sure.
We've been through boys who have been deserving of our giving natures, if only for a short period of time.
We've raised our four-legged children together, even when we've wanted to beat them within an inch of their lives.
We've chatted incessantly for hours on end, and we've also sat in companionable silence for the same length of time.
We've convinced ourselves that we should have our own reality show, because there is just no way that anyone else can get into the kind of trouble that we do when we're together. It's not possible.

The past few months have been rough, mainly for you, only a little bit for me, but I feel like we've both grown so much because of it. Your words of advice when I get myself into situations that I know damn well I shouldn't...they don't go unheeded, even though most of the time it looks that way. One of my favorite things about you is that you are not afraid to tell me "I told you so" while wiping away my tears. Well, that and your ass.

Love you, missy!

Bananza!!

Too little, too late

Fireman, after nearly five days of no contact, popped up in my phone on Saturday evening, asking how I was. I ignored his text.

They became harder to ignore as they kept popping up, every half hour, random little snippets, his attempt at small talk. I continued to ignore them throughout the evening.

Sunday morning...early. My phone buzzes yet again. MG#2 asks me who it is when I read it and make a face. I explain the story to him. He grabs my phone and replies. It wasn't very nice. Fireman gets angry, accuses me of not ever trying to understand his life, that i don't know him at all, and even throws a couple of choice names in my direction. The text that he received from "me" warranted them, I'll admit, but it still hurt me to see him upset.

A few hours later, he wrote back again, apologizing, explaining the situation as best he could. He is no good because he is "tainted goods" and when he's not at work or with me, he's also "a dad".

After about two and a half months, he still kept this fact from me. WTF? Why? I am not a judgmental person, AT ALL, and would have gladly accepted any of his baggage because it was HIM I was interested in, not his past. Yet, he never gave me that chance, and his lies make mw wonder what else I had not been told.

Such a waste. He missed out on a good thing, due to the fact that he wasn't willing to let me into his life. As I sit here now typing this, he texts again "Let me know if you wanna hang out later".

A part of me wants to, but I won't let that part win. The worst thing is, that part that wants to see him is so very sad.

Wicked weekend

Just like that, it's Monday again. How did that happen?

Monday's are always sooo much worse after fantastic weekends.

Friday turned into a gong show, much like predicted. We shot tequila, we danced in places where people don't usually dance, we laughed, we made asses of ourselves, the wheels fell off in general. It was exactly what the doctor ordered in more ways than one. Despite starting at two in the afternoon, most of us made it til sometime after midnight. Makeout Guy #2 joined in the shenanigans partway through the evening, and I may or may not have squired him away to my place at the end of the evening.

Best Girlfriend (BG) came and picked us up in the morning to take us to our cars, and we all ended up going for breakfast where many more laughs were had. After that it was off to a friend's hockey game, and then for lunch and beers, which started to once again turn into trouble, so I headed home to chill out for a bit before the evening. I ended up having a few friends over for dinner and drinks, therefore there was not much chill time to be had. We had fun though, so that's all that matters.

At the end of the night, I went and picked up BG and Makeout Guy #2 from their respective bars as I was the sober one. Queue sleepover part two.

Sunday consisted of myself, MG#2 & BG lazing around on the couch, watching football, eating junk food, walking dogs, more laughs, and some cuddling.

It was a fantastic weekend, and I know this is pretty vague, but I'm feeling a wee bit overwhelmed after spending four straight days with MG#2, and I really, really need to keep myself in check. So I'm going to leave it at that for now. If anything major happens in that department, I'll keep you posted.

Tomorrow I'll tell you all about Fireman and his sudden re-entry back in my life.

That lasted long

Two days into NaBloPoMo and already I have failed.

Stupid home internet connection.

Whisker rub

This is going to be a poor excuse for a post, but we're moving offices today and I only have about ten more minutes before they shut my power down! After that we head to the bar for lunch and some bevvies...this is most likely going to get ugly.

I am very tired today...making out until the wee hours of the morning will do that to a girl.

Fireman who?

Douchebag Magnet

I wrote a post a few weeks back, and "Jo asked me to clarify it a bit, so here we go:

Online Guy = Fireman.

Makeout Guy #1 = did not end up making out with me any further that night.

The same night as the post in question, Fireman was the one who ended up coming out with me, and not Makeout Guy #1. He met my friends, he came drinking with us...and then he attempted to pull a fast one on me. Having just come from work, he wanted to shower before we went out, so I met him quickly at my place so that he could do just that. He asked if he could check his e-mail, I said of course, and went out to walk the dog. Upon my return, his quick little hands just weren't quick enough. I managed to see that he'd been checking his online dating profile...at my house! against my better judgment, I shrugged it off, we went out and enjoyed the rest of our night. Kind of. He failed to impress my friends, didn't even try, actually. He made a few comments that made me question his intentions. Still, I let him stick around. (Yes, I know now that I am an idiot)

For the next couple of weeks, things were OK. We had a few dinners, went out to a few events, talked daily...and then the kicker--he introduced me to his sister. That threw me for a loop, but still I didn't take it all that seriously.

This past weekend came, he called asking if he could come and see me after work, I agreed. We had a nice night in...watched some TV, had a little nap, he bought dinner for us, we watched a movie, and then went to bed. He was affectionate, sweet, didn't try anything as he knew I wasn't feeling well. I was once again thrown for a loop, because it seemed like things were different, like he was trying to be the nice guy that he'd been in the beginning. I was still wary, but was wondering if maybe things were starting to change.

They weren't.

I had drinks Tuesday afternoon with a few co-workers (read: we got shmammered) and I started flirting with him via text. He made a comment about he had to work that night, but that he had a friend who was fun. That pissed me off, so I wrote him back something along the lines of "Not sure if you know, but I kinda like you and don't really want to hang out with anyone but you. How do you feel about that?"

His reply "Whoa that's crazy talk" followed up with a "I bad news"

My response? " Not crazy talk. Drunk talk. Still mean it though, sorry if that freaks u out"

We've spoken every day since we first started talking, but since then? Nothing, not a word. At least now I know how he feels about the situation and about me.
Sad, really. I thought he was a nicer guy than he actually turned out to be, when in reality, he's a game playing prick who was just in it for fun. Too bad he hadn't been honest about that from the very beginning, because he really sold me on the fact that he was looking for something more, and I did genuinely like him. I guess I was just a convenience while he looked for something better. I wish him good luck with finding it.

In the meantime, I've got a little rendezvous of my own planned tonight with Makeout Guy #2 (that's a whole other story)...right after I pen a kiss off letter to Fireman.

I'm thinking of something short and sweet--"Dating Rule #24: Don't Check Your Online Dating Account at the House of the Girl You're Currently Dating. P.S. You suck. A lot."

30 Days of Nothing

November is NaBloPoMo. Therefore, I will be attempting to make it through by posting every day for the month of November.

It might be good for me, as I'm sure it will become a complex tale of my dating life as of late, and maybe give me a chance to sort though everything that is racing around in my jumbled up head.

I'll apologize in advance for my rambling.

Tee-Rouble

Oh boy. I just got back from a semi-liquid lunch with some friends...and makeout boy from last week was there.

It was a wee bit awkward at first, but my smartass friends sat us across from one another...so the awkwardness had no choice but to be gone within the first five minutes. That's when the flirting started. First off it was "I may have been drunk, and may not be able to recall all of our dialogue, but I remember everything, and I mean EVERYTHING, else that happened."

That? Coupled with his killer grin and his super long lashes? It's ON, baby. I'm merely passing the next hour and a bit here until we head back to the bar to meet up with everyone else...the fact that Fireman and I hung out last night, and it was a really great night? I'm taking some of your advice and continuing on with my fun.

This could be trouble.

Underestimated his sneakiness?

I need your wise advice, internets...here's the scenario - and yes, it involves a girl and a boy.

Let's say you've been dating this guy, who you met via an online dating site. You started talking back at the end of August, it was sporadic for a while, then second week into September, it became daily...it then progressed to four hour long phone conversations for a week straight. You met in person about two and a half weeks ago, and since then you talk/text numerous times a day, every day. You've been on about 6 dates, 4 of which have been sleepovers. Things seem to be going really well, and you find yourself growing quite fond of him.

Then today, you log into your online dating profile to re-read the messages that started it all. OK, fine, not really...you wanted to read the e-mails, but you also wanted to check out his profile, see if it's still kicking around.

Well, not only is it still kicking around, the profile name has changed (you know this because his messages are still in your inbox, just saved under his new profile name! Bet he doesn't know that!) There's a lot more info on it, as well...AND new pictures! You instantly see red and wonder WTF!?!?!?!?!?!?!

Here's where it gets tricky...you haven't exactly been a stranger to the dating site yourself, although your profile is the exact same as it was when you first started chatting. Also, there has been no talk of exclusivity between the two of you, although the more you hang out, the more it seems that that's the direction it's headed. There's been intimacy (a lot of it), which to you, implies that you are (or at least should be) the one and only who's getting that, uh, treatment. Not to mention that clandestine (yet drunken!) make out session you took part in this past weekend...with a boy who was NOT online guy. Yes, you know...hello, kettle...hello, pot...

So, with all of the above information...how do you handle it? Is it time to have the "what are we" conversation? Do you ask him right out where you stand? Or ask him right out if he's dating/sleeping with other people? Do you call him on the fact that you saw he's changed his profile? Do you act all sneaky and write to him as someone else? (I know that last one is out of the question, but come on, it crossed at least some of your minds...right?)

If there were ever a time for you to speak up, it's now!!
What would you do???

What up, MoFo?

Today is The Great MoFo Delurk 2007



Don't be shy, say hello...if you do, I promise to tell you about the cute fireman!
I'll even stop by and say hello to you!

Things are looking up!

Two words.

Fire. Fighter.

At the risk of jinxing myself, my lips will remain sealed for the time being.

At least, they will be when it comes to you guys. Heh.

Treading water...

The ‘rain’ around these parts has not let up any, but I’m learning to deal with it as it comes, although admittedly barely managing to keep my head above water.

Not only am I still dealing with the whole stomach issue (it is much better, but is still there), I had to go and get myself rear ended at highway speed a week ago Tuesday. I was heading up north with two girlfriends to go and see Justin! Timberlake! in concert...a concert that I had been anxiously awaiting for months. We were happily on our way, having our own little sing-along in the car, when traffic slowed up ahead. We braked, came almost to a complete stop..and then WHAM! We were hit from behind at about 110km/h by a big pickup truck. We were bounced around in traffic a few times, then were sent careening into the ditch, finally stopping about 100m from where we were originally hit.

We’re all OK, no major damage, aside from the vehicle which was written off. I’m suffering from a severe case of whiplash that has made the most mundane daily tasks uncomfortable at best. I’m going to my wonderful chiropractor and masseuse, but all they’re really doing right now is making me hurt like a motherf*cker. I know it will get better, but seeing as how I can’t take drugs at work, by the time I get home, all I want to do is have a lovely cocktail of Tylenol 3 and wine. That can’t be good for me for too much longer.

Enough whining…there have been some moments where the sun has broken through the rain:

- I did manage to make it *just* in time to see my not-so-secret crush in concert, which was amazing…well, what I remember of it through my adrenaline/pain induced stupor (seriously, how’s THAT for dedication?)

- I went on one of the best first dates of my entire life, and for once I actually want to go on the second…what was originally planned as a one drink, let’s-see-if-we’re-into-one-another plan, turned into the two of us getting kicked out of the lounge at last call, and may or may not have ended with a 3 hour make-out session in my car (seriously, I’m 28 and live on my own…who does that anymore?). We had great conversation, lots of laughs, and a lot of touchy feelyness...and it doesn’t hurt that he’s GOR-geous and has washboard abs. Mmmm…sorry, what was I saying? Oh, right, that I want to rock his…I mean, hang out with him again very soon.

- I’ve spent a lot of time with dear friends, friends that I have not seen a lot of in the last little while. A lot are going through issues, and it means the world to me that they chose me to be there to help them through it. Although the drinking involved…oy!

- Speaking of cars…I got a new one! My very first new car, not previously owned. Brand spanking shiny and new. I haven’t been able to drive it as of yet as my whiplash keeps me from being able to shoulder check…but when I’m good to go, that baby is gonna whip around corners like no one’s business.

- I found new music. Her name is Colbie Caillat…the lyrics are somewhat juvenile in places, but the music is upbeat and bubbly and makes me happy. It’s been on repeat on my iPod for the past two days, that’s how much I love it.

- Tonight we’re having a party! Most of my closest friends altogether in one room! There will be laughing, and drinking, and many photo ops.

So all in all, whiplash or not, life’s really not that bad.

It's raining, it's pouring

Well, it's going to be awfully difficult to regale you with sordid dating tales, mostly due to the fact that my gallbladder is trying ever so hard to have itself removed from my body!

I've been in a lot of pain the past week...and just my luck, my family doc has been on ohlidays for the past two weeks, leaving me at the mercy of the dreaded walk-in clinic. You know that clinic...where they push you through as fast as they can, and you end up with a diagnosis so far-fetched from your original symptoms that you leave shaking your head in confusion? That's pretty much what happened to me...I mean, have you ever had a UTI that causes great pain on your right upper abdomen after you eat? Have you ever had a UTI that makes you feel nauseous when you eat fatty foods? Yeah, didn't think so.

Yet, after a week of blood tests and urine tests and ultrasounds, all the doctor can tell me is that I have a UTI, and that it should be burning when I pee. Trust me, it doesn't. I think I'll be getting a second opinion, thanks.

That being said, I've spent the better part of the past week and half holed up at home, on the couch, with a collection of movies and books. The dog, he's not liking it all that much, either...especially since he's come down with a nice case of kennel cough.

I tell ya...when it rains around these parts, it fucking pours.

Not so much

Um, yeah...that whole dating hiatus that I was talking about?

Soooo not gonna happen.

Stay tuned for tales involving really tall boys and jacket leavers.

Time for the Date Doctor?

I've done a lot of thinking about relationships lately - what I am looking for, what I'm excited for, what I'm willing to tolerate.

It's been a few weeks of introspection now, brought on mainly by the wedding of the summer. All around me, friends of mine are finding that special someone that they choose to share their lives with. They're pledging their commitment, settling down, starting families of their own...and while I am genuinely happy for all of them, I can't help but feel a twinge of...something*...wondering when, or if, I'll follow along the same path.

This past weekend, while out in BC with some dear friends, we talked a lot about it all. I was with two couples, both of whom have dealt with some pretty dicey situations between them as of late. Yet, regardless of everything that's taken place, they have chosen to power through, fight for their love and the life that they share, emerging from the turmoil stronger than ever.

I witnessed a few tender moments pass between them, and I couldn't help but smile and long for my own version of "us". Yet, while I sit there and think about how nice it would be to have that someone sitting next to me, it freaks me out, and I can't seem to figure out why. I have never been a commitment-phobe type of gal...I've been in three fairly long term relationships (five years, three years, one year) so I know that it's in me.

I know that I am wary of getting hurt again, and also of settling for a relationship that isn't quite right. I will never again be involved with someone who I am not 100% happy with. Don't get me wrong, I know that relationships are not always sunshine and rainbows. The plain and simple fact is that most of the time, they damn well should be. With all of this dating I've been doing, you'd think that someone with the right qualities might have come along by now.

Nope.

There's been a handful of guys that, if I were the settling type, would make fantastic partners...but there's always been that little something missing. No spark, no butterflies, no zsa-zsa-zsu. The thing that has been the most difficult to deal with is having fantastic conversations with guys on the phone, or over e-mail, the kind where everything seems perfectly lined up for a lifetime of white picket fences and 2.5 kids..and then, you meet in person and feel absolutely nothing.

I was going somewhere with this, but I got sidetracked as per usual...my original point has been lost. Basically, I am sick to death of meeting all these guys and having to make a good impression, only to have it not go anywhere. Even when it is my choice to not pursue it, it's just starting to feel like a lot of work. More than I am willing to deal with right now.

Maybe it's time for a dating hiatus....or not. We'll see.

*I say "something" as it's not jealousy that I'm feeling. It's more of a longing, I suppose, for someone that I can share my day and all of it's little intimacies with.

Whirlwinds and Vows

AND...breathe.

August is here. Holy crap, when did THAT happen? July was a whirlwind month for me, probably the busiest month I've ever had in my life.

It all started with a trip to The Cabin for the annual Canada Day weekend shindig...although this year it was more of a pre-wedding shindig.

I brought a boy as my date to said cabin shindig. A boy that I thought I liked a lot. Once again...wrong. He said something about a good friend of mine within hours of us arriving, and just like that, it was over for me. You don't diss my friends, especially not to my face. Especially when you've already said it once before and I specifically asked you NOT to repeat it ever again. Drunk or not, it's no excuse. Any respect I may have had for you? Instantly non-existent. Yes, just like that.

Needless to say, I spent the weekend ignoring him, and yes, I know that it was not the most mature choice, but I did not want to cause a scene and/or drama, so being civil to him but avoiding him at all costs was my method of dealing.

Also, before you say I'm a bitch for bringing him with me and consequently ignoring him, he had a mutual friend there as well, and he also got a free long weekend at a cabin on the lake, complete with wakeboarding and sunshine. Not so bad if you ask me.

Moving along, the week that I returned from the cabin was the commencement of the Stampede (aka DrunkFest 2007). Ten days of boozing and dancing and ogling cute cowboys. Throw in the fact that i was single, and let's just say that a good time was had. A really good time. I attended more than a few breakfasts and lunches, all with free-flowing booze. My industry is a fantastic one to be in when Stampede rolls around. I got to spend time with good friends, sweating to death in smelly beer tents, two-stepping with drunken tourists and locals alike. Factor in that each night was capped off with fireworks displays, and all in all you've got a kick ass ten days. My liver, however, slightly disagrees.

With Stampede done and over with, the wedding preparation was in full force. Best thing of it was...I got a killer cold. Less than two weeks before the wedding. ColdFx, echinacea, Vitamin C...they all became my best friends. I must have looked like the biggest pill popper around, setting alarms to remind me to take my immune system boosters at all hours of the day. In the end, the cold was banished in time, and all last minute details were taken care of. Dresses altered, nails painted, cameras charged, my slideshow completed and gone over with a fine tooth comb. We were good to go.

With the finishing touches complete, we embarked on pre-wedding dinners to celebrate birthdays of out-of-town guests, rehearsals, rehearsal dinners...and then the big day was upon us. It went by in such a blur. Just like that, two years of prep was over in a flash, and one of my dearest friends was married to the man of her dreams. The day was magical...a stunning bride, a handsome groom, a pretty spiffy bridal party, and a beautiful venue...topped off with a fireworks display that a dear friend had planned and kept secret for the rest of us. One of the groomsmen said that even he, a big, burly guy, was reduced to soundtrack love songs playing in his head as the entire crowd oohed and aahed at the sparkles above.

The party lasted until the wee hours of the morning, with even the bride and groom among the last guests to leave. We danced and laughed and surprisingly, didn't drink too much. This turned out to be a good thing, as some of the bridesmaids had to be up early the next morning to help prep for the gift opening. Another fantastic day, with nearly half of the wedding guests stopping by at some point or another throughout the day. We reminisced over photo albums that people had brought with them (by the way, who the F manages to print off pictures and put them in an freaking album from the wedding that happened the DAY BEFORE? I will never be one of those people, but I secretly envy them for their put togetherness) and shared stories of guests who had indulged a wee bit more than the rest of us.

All in all, July was a pretty fantastic month. I'm sad that the wedding is over and that there is not really a big event for all of us to look forward to now. Yet, at the same time, I am looking forward to having some much needed relaxation and time for myself and my family. I plan on enjoying this last month of summer, right down to the very last drop of sunshine.

Around these parts, busy is an understatement

Wow. I kinda forgot about this here blog thing over the past month...

I, as always, have been busier than a one armed paper hanger.
What's that? You wanna know all the exciting things that I've been up to?? OK!! Here we go:

- Working my butt off, trying to keep my head above water and not drown in the piles and piles of paperwork stacked precariously on my desk.

- Refraining from use of Facebook and Blogger at work, due to stern talk from boss (see above: working butt off to move back into boss' good graces)

- Fulfilling bridesmaidsly (yes, I know, not a real word) duties:
- helping maid of honor plan fantastic fundraiser/stagette complete with cooking lessons, silent auction, champagne & belly dancers - event and consequent hangover were both out of this world
- attending showers for bride to be (times 3)
- working on slideshow for wedding
- attending makeup trials and last night's out as a single girl

- taking the pup to Loose Leashes obedience classes...6 weeks of Saturday morning, 11:00 am...this past one was the only one where I was not hungover...he graduated with flying colors as the instructor lightheartedly poked fun at me for being such a lush. Hey, at least I come by it honestly.

- dating. At the beginning of May, around time of last post, probably about a half dozen dates that obviously never went anywhere. I was ready to give up and just coast along for a while...then, as life always works out, something happened. See below.

- spending a fair bit of time with a new boy :O) ...it's been about 3 weeks now, and so far, so good! He's a lot of fun, and for the first time in my life, I feel like I am REALLY ready for this whole relationship thing. I have not really stressed about it at all, it just feels right. I don't doubt much of anything when it comes to him, yet at the same time, I am not rushing into anything, or putting a lot of expectations on it. We're having a great time, and for now, that's all that matters. Also, it's kind of an odd situation...I met him through friends, and I am committing the cardinal sin of (gasp!) having previously fooled around with one of his friends. Nothing ever came of it with said friend, though, was always just a fun hey-let's-hook-up kinda thing, and new boy was fully aware of it before getting involved with me. That being said, we've been a bit hesitant to let others know about what's been going on between us...a wee bit of guilt, I suppose. That will all change this weekend when he accompanies me on an out of town trip with a dozen of my closest friends. It will be our own special kind of "coming out" party. Hehe.

- playing softball. One night a week we pull a double header, and I tell ya...softball is not supposed to be that much of a workout, but when I get home after working all day and heading right to the diamond, I am frigging BEAT. It's all I can do to change out of my sweaty ball clothes before falling into bed.

- Facebooking. Those of you who use it need no explanation.

- Concert-going. Gwen Stefani. The Killers. The Dudes. All fantastic shows with equally fantastic friends.

- Watching my new TV if I ever find myself with a spare second. 50 inches of pure plasma goodness. I swear, when it comes to having the newest gadgets and electronics, I should have a penis.

- Spending time with good friends & family...the summer months are indeed my favorite. Beers on patios, backyard BBQ's, hiking, lakes, camping, outdoorsy stuff in general. It does not get any better than this.

- Wishing that life would slow down, while in reality, I'm hoping that it won't. I may come home at the end of each day exhausted after beers/dog walks/movies/concerts/baseball/shenanigans, but if given the option, I would not change a single thing. These are the memories that I will hold close to my heart. for years & years to come, my life as I build it.

Interview Time

I pestered the lovely Amanda to interview me...and then promptly took about, oh, three weeks to answer. I am a jerk. My apologies.

Without further ado, my interview (not as witty as I'd hoped, I'm so frazzled)

1.Dr. Burke: love him or hate him? Has your view of him changed with this season's controversy regarding Isaiah Washington's homophobia?

Well, I did really like him before the whole TR Knight incident. His character was awesome, his no bullshit attitude with Christina was fantastic. Then when that all went down, even though it wasn’t his character that did it, I couldn’t help but think of it every time he was on screen and it infuriated me that he could be such a narrow minded prick. Don’t even get me started on his performance on last night’s episode…

2. What is your favourite flower?

For looks: Gerber daisy, hands down. I think it's the symmetry…they will be my wedding bouquet one day.
For scent: Stargazer lily. Reminds me of my grandmother.

3. Do you have any scars with cool stories behind them?

My appendectomy scar has a pretty cool story behind it…I was eleven years old, and started to experience this crippling stomach pain. I’m talking pain so bad that I couldn’t walk without being doubled over. We went to the clinic, the doctor said it was probably stress. Yes, because an eleven year old girl would have experience stress like that (Well, some do, but trust me, I wasn’t)…the next day we went to my doctor, who immediately called an ambulance and I was rushed to the hospital…my appendix had burst two days prior and I was on the verge of dying from septic shock (or something of the like). I spent the next two weeks in hospital recovering. Scary then, but cool now.

My scar is now covered over with a dragonfly tattoo…it represents something special, but that’s a story for another time.

4. What is your favourite drink?

Non-alcoholic: blueberry green tea - hot or iced
Alcoholic: gin & tonic

5. If you could compete in any Olympic sport, which would you choose?

Oooo, that’s a tough one. Olympic athletes are so unbelievably talented and disciplined…I’m going to go with downhill skiing. That would be SUCH a rush.

Conversations with J

Warning - The following are probably only funny to J & I.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
J – “What movie are we going to see again? The Ripening?

C – (laughing) “No, the Reapening*.”

*known to the rest of the world as “The Reaping”, so this proves that I am, in fact, an idiot
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
J – “So I get home, and the dog sticks his nose in my purse, grabs my birth control, and takes off! By the time I get to him, he’s already got three pills in his mouth. He ate one, but I managed to grab two.”

Me – “Is that OK for him?

J – “Well, I called the vet right away and they said he should be fine, but asked what he was doing right now. I told them he was trying to hump my leg, and she said, laughing - well, the pill should help with that urge.”

Me – (snorting)

J – “It’s not funny! I still have to take the two he had in his mouth!”

Five minute breather

I, my friends, have been busier than a one-armed paper hanger.

I can’t believe it’s been nearly a month since I last wrote. Life has been nutso, and for the sake of my sanity, I’m going to be lazy and point form what I’ve been up to.

- A week at home, sick in bed. Missed 4.5 days of work, because other idiots in my office INSIST in coming in, spreading their germs around and making the rest of us suffer for it. I haven’t been that sick in a long, long while…I felt worse than when I had pneumonia back at Christmas.
- I spent a whole weekend hanging out with A Boy. Three whole days of eating, movies, hockey, cuddling, that general kind of fun you have when you first spend time with someone…then this past weekend, we hang out Friday, and it is now Monday and not a peep from him. I’m REALLY starting to tire of this.
- Looking after my pup, who got slightly ill from the FRIGGING tainted dog food. Poor little guy. He’s recovered nicely, but I swear, if I could get my hands on the douchebags who though something like this would be funny…
- Working my butt off. It has been so crazy around here again, sometimes I wonder why I stick around.
- Feeding my Facebook addiction. That shit is ka-razy!! I have found/been found by so many long lost friends. BUT…the question I start to ask myself is…if we haven’t talked in so many years, there’s probably a reason, right?
- Going to birthday parties and generally drinking my face off. Seems like 1/3 of my friends were born in April, which meant parties every weekend, both nights. I have been a minor gong show ever since Mexico…
- …as a result of my party girl behavior, I started this again. I am on Day 3 of no wheat, no sugar, no dairy, and gasp! NO BOOZE!!! So far, so good, but I’m sure I’ll be cranky by tomorrow. As for the no booze part…waking up at 7 am on a weekend morning (NOT hungover) sure has it’s benefits…I got so much done yesterday!
- Learning how to use my new-ish camera. I’ve had it since December and have not really had a chance to do more than use the auto settings.
- Training my dog. He’s a handful, and only wants to learn when it’s good for him. I’ll break him somehow, the little brat!
- Hanging out with good friends, having lots of laughs, taking lots of silly pictures, and playing Nintendo Wii at my old roommate’s place. It’s is ridiculous, and I cannot get enough of it!
- Enjoying The Spring that has finally arrived! About freaking time!!!
- Stalking all of your blogs as they keep me sane when works gets hectic.

Things I have NOT been doing:

- answering Amanda’s interview questions (I promise, this week I will for sure!)
- laundry
- following my budget
- taking care of myself (but am now, thank you Wild Rose Cleanse!)
- seeing my family
- staying out of trouble ;O)

For now, that is all. Happy Monday.

Will you go out with me?

Lately, I’ve been going on dates. A lot of dates. I think I’ve been on about eight first dates in the past month and a half.

Thing is, I’ve never dated before in my life. EVER. I’ve always managed to meet my boyfriends through friends or co-workers.

Notice how I said boyfriends? That’s because I guess I’m what you’d call a “serial relationshipper,” if there were such a term. In the past, I meet a guy, we click, and then we end up dating for at least three months. It’s just the way it’s always been.

Since The Boy and I broke up about seven months ago, I’ve been pretty much single (except for the relationship that wasn’t really a relationship with the biggest douche bag ever). I’ve enjoyed it a lot, but found that at the end of January, I was missing some of the finer aspects of having a male around (and no, I’m not just talking about S-E-X). So, being the brave and fearless soul that I am, I decided to venture into the online dating world (cringe if you want, I did at first). Hence the reason I’ve been a dating machine.

It’s been an experience so far…I’ve met a few really nice guys, I’ve met some odd ducks. The very first guy I met in person was amazing at first…and then after Day 4, he started to plan our Christmas together, talked about taking me out east to meet his mom, etc. He even mentioned marriage and kids. I’m not kidding. While for some people, that might work, I don’t really like to get engaged after a week of knowing someone. It was pretty difficult for me to tell him he was moving too fast for me…I tried to be really nice about it, but he just wasn’t getting it. When I got back from Mexico (about a month after I said goodbye to him) I had an e-mail saying he still thinks of me every day and really hopes we can work it out. I haven’t answered.

My second date, I was a mess for two days beforehand. Jittery, nervous…I almost didn’t go. He was a firefighter, and turned out to be a very nice guy. We had dinner, then went for drinks, then walked my dog. We chatted back and forth for a bit, and then it just dwindled down to nothing. I was kind of upset at first, but got over it quickly…I was thinking that we’d hit it off immediately and all would be shiny and glowy and happily ever after. Not so much.

I went for coffee with one guy who left after about fifteen minutes because he just wasn’t “feeling it”. He literally almost ran out of Starbucks. That one kinda stung a bit.

My first date with another guy was to a wedding. A very small, intimate wedding that consisted of family and a few close friends. Strange, I know. He took offense when I bowed out of the group wedding photo. I tried to explain that I didn’t want to be that girl in their wedding photos that no one knew ten years down the road, and he mumbled something about how that didn’t bode very well for his chance at a second date. I guess I should have known then that I wasn’t feeling a connection.

There’s been drinks with a couple more which have led to nothing else, a movie last night with another, and e-mails/texting back and forth with a handful of others.

Point of the story is…dating is TIRING. Especially when you’ve never done it before. Rushing home from work, getting all dolled up. Being on your best behavior (kinda), having to be witty and charming all the time, trying to remember the little things that they tell you in case you make it to Date Number Two. Then there’s the part I hate the most…the dreaded end of the night. Is he going to kiss me? How about now? How’s my breath? Seriously, dude, are you going to make a move or not? What if he’s not a good kisser? What if there’s no physical chemistry? Sometimes I think my head is going to explode.

Yet, I keep on going on awkward first dates, because one day, we’ll make it through to Date Number two and it will be fantastic.

I just know it.

That's it, I'm moving

Yesterday, in our lovely city, it was a balmy 18 degrees Celsius. The sun was shining down, the skies were blue. Bauer and I hung out outside for most of the day, playing catch and catching rays. I wore shorts and flip flops. It was fantastic, and I was almost convinced that spring had finally arrived.

Then *POOF* my bubble burst.

I just heard on the radio that there is a heavy snowfall warning in effect overnight, with up to 15 cm of snow coming our way.

All I've got to say to that is FUCK. YOU. WEATHERMAN.

I don't like your girlfriend

OK, so I’m not normally a huge Avril Lavigne fan…BUT…her new song, Girlfriend?
It’s PERFECT for running on the treadmill. I kid you not.

Try it. Only problem is the little ditty gets stuck in your freaking head…Hey, hey! You, you!

Better to have loved and lost..

I’ve been doing a lot of reflecting as of late. Not sure what started it, but I am really enjoying it.
I think it’s the fact that I am now walking to work...those twenty minutes first thing in the morning and at the end of my day, coupled with all of the walks that the pup and I go on, give me a lot of time to ponder my life.

If you had asked me ten years ago (at the ripe old age of eighteen) where I’d be at this point in my life, you can bet your ass it would not have even been close to where I am.

Back then, I was in a serious relationship with C…we ended up being together for five years...had a house together, I had the promise ring on my finger, the whole nine yards. If I had stayed with him, we’d be married now with two kids.

I had always been somewhat of a homebody before…worked five minutes from where I lived, didn’t move out until I was almost twenty two. I had dealt with alcoholism thanks to my adopted father, and as a result was pretty much responsible for raising my two brothers up until I moved out. I don’t regret one second of it, as it’s forged an amazing relationship with them, but as a result I never really had a chance to act like a kid. I had settled with C and thought that he was going to be the one I would spend the rest of my life with.

That all changed when I started working downtown and saw what life REALLY had to offer. There were drinks after work, lunches, meetings, more new people in my life than I could shake a stick at, and I was loving the new lifestyle that I was leading. Things fell apart with C…he accused me of cheating on him, was always angry that I wasn’t coming home right after work. I started to realize that this was my time to do what I wanted to do, and that he was resentful of it for whatever reason.

Being the oh-so-mature person that I am when it comes to ending a relationship (I suck at it, and would rather just fade away into the background til I’m forgotten about)…I stopped calling him. Stopped answering his calls. We did actually talk about it after a few weeks…I told him that I couldn’t do it anymore, that I wanted to pack up and move home until I got things sorted out in my head. He did not want anything of the sort, and flat out refused to accept the fact that I was no longer a part of “us”. When I went to pick up my things weeks later, he had hidden some of my favorite sentimental knick knacks. It was so very spiteful of him, and I was so angry, but felt it not right to ask him where they were as he was already hurting enough. Now, I wish that I had.

I know that I could have further discussed my issues with him, but I just wasn’t prepared to deal with the drama that I know would take place. It broke his heart, I know that now. A few months later, he dropped a card off at my parent’s place, saying that he thought I had issues that needed to be dealt with, that I had broken his heart and he’d never get over it. I felt horrible, but I had tried to explain to him how I was feeling, and his receptiveness was very notably absent.

As for the issues? Yeah, they were there. I’m not denying it at all. I was a young girl who had been forced to grow up too soon, and now had the chance to live a life that was of her own choosing…I was discovering myself, and haven’t really stopped since.

About a year ago a friend of mine told me that, through the grapevine, he was still upset about the way things went down. Six years later. I just can't imagine it.

The point of all this is that although I feel horribly about the way I treated him, I don’t have any regrets about it. I know that sounds harsh, but if I had stayed where I was, I would have missed out on so much in my life – people, love, friends, work, experiences. Regretting something like that would just eat away at my happiness, and to me, that’s just not worth it.

The plain and simple fact - this is life…you love, you lose, you laugh, you cry, you learn. That’s never going to change. I’d rather love and lose a dozen times over than settle with someone that doesn’t being me true happiness.

Spawn of the devil

Facebook is addicting...and evil.

That is all.

In a world of my own

I am feeling very wishy-washy as of late.

I do not feel like working. I’ve been back for a week, and all I can think about is my vacation.

I want dazzling sun, blue skies, faint breezes, and the sound of the ocean pounding into the sand.
I want Bermuda shorts, flip-flops, hot pink toes, and no responsibilities.
I want blended drinks with tiny rainbow-hued umbrellas, smutty books, and no idea of what time it is.
I want beach volleyball, sand clinging to skin, muscles rippling, and tight young bodies.
I want naps in gently swaying hammocks, coconut scented suntan lotion, and Jackie O sunglasses.
I want thumping bass, gyrating hips, and bedroom eyes across the crowded dance floor.
I want bare flesh, butterflies, and sensuous sex on the beach.

I want to be away from here.

What happens in Mexico...

I am back. Safe. Not sound.

Seven straight days of straight drinking. We were seriously savages.

Before we left, it was all finger pointing, hand waving “ I am NOT spending my entire vacation drinking at the beach and going to the same bar EVERY night. I just won’t do it. I want to shop, and go on tours, and see the city!”

Pfft. Yeah, right. We spent all day, every day at the hotel, recovering from drinking our faces off the night before, and then starting to drink again. The only thing that was different was that S and I went to a different bar every night.

So what did we see of Puerto Vallarta? We saw, in no particular order:

Senor Frog’s
Hilo
Carlos O’Brien’s
Andale’s
The Zoo
Some shady local bar called Dollar’s
A LOT of the three hotel bars

In retrospect, though, we all absolutely needed a good ol’ twist off vacation. All of us had experienced pretty crappy things over the past year, and it was nice to have some female bonding (Ha! I originally typed bonging…go figure) and some fun times. It was Spring Break down there, and we acted like a bunch of high school seniors on our very first beach vacation.

I managed to achieve my personal goal of making out with someone every night (apparently, in Mexico, I can flirt! And flirt well! Who knew?) Yes, this might sound trampy, but this is the first time I’ve been single in years, and my first ever all-girls vacation while I was single, so keep your opinion to yourself!

I was engaged to be married on three separate occasions; I actually got ‘married’ once! Then spent two nights with him sharing his room. Then found out he lives in my city, about 10 minutes away from me. Trust me to go to Mexico and meet a guy from my hometown. Frig.

I went to bed no earlier than 5 am on any given night.

I went in the pool! (Those who know me will be gasping in shock right now)

I broke my camera. I don’t want to talk about it.

I discovered these cool little purple-blue glowy things on the beach at night, which turned out to be plankton or something. Man, were they ever cool after a night at the bar.

I ate burgers every morning at 4 am with the rest of the crew, but I was the only one who had the privilege of wearing the chef’s hat.

I met a ton of really cool fun people from all over the world. Boston! Minnesota! Alabama! Ottawa! North Dakota! Iowa! England!

I danced my ass off every night, and lived up to my boozy nickname.

I made myself sick off of tequila poppers.

I saw a whale! A real one!

I did not get sick from drinking the water.

I had the best vacation of my entire life and miss the girls dearly every day that we’ve been apart.

It’s taken me a full five days to recover from the hangover. I am in serious withdrawal, and waking up to snow on Tuesday morning just about put me over the edge.
I’m dealing with a cold now, and still don’t feel 100% up to par.

Yet, even with all of these post-vacation-coming-down-symptoms, I wouldn’t trade one second of my week.

Adios, amigos!

I'm outta here...one week in the Puerto Vallarta sun with the girls, and my good friend Jose. As in Cuervo.

Did I mention that it's Spring Break? I foresee some harmless flirting coming on. Let's just hope it goes better than last time!

Have a great week, everyone!

If only this were the movies

Coming home from work last night, I was laden down with my gym bag, my purse, some shopping, and a six pack of Corona (needed to practice for Mexico, ya know).

In front of me walked one of the most handsome guys I have ever seen. Tall, dark, and handsome, piercing green eyes. In a word - yowza! As I ever so gracefully attempted to balance my load, he offered to hold the door open for me (he lives in my building!) and I coquettishly batted my eyes at him. I stepped back and waited for him to finish checking his mail so that I could do the same, and as he stepped back he smiled and said "Corona, hey? Looks like a good idea!"

If this were the movies, I'd have said something along the lines of "Well, you should come up and have one with me!" or "I'm willing to share."

Alas, my friends, this is not the movies. I dropped my keys, almost dropped the beer, and managed to bumble out "Yup, sure is! Best idea I've had all day!" as he walked away (into the condo directly below me! whee!) with an amused grin on his face. I held myself back from bashing my head against the wall in mortification.

It is so very apparent to me that I will never be one of those girls who can effortlessly flirt and charm unsuspecting boys. I guess I'll have to rely on the cuteness that is Bauer. *sigh*

Four seasons in a day

My city has the craziest weather EVER. Some days it drives me frigging batshit crazy.

On Sunday, it was 17C and I was wearings shorts and flip flops.
Woke up on Monday morning to rain...which turned to sunshine at around noon. Then, on the way home, it was cold and windy.

The kicker, though, was waking up to about 6+ inches of SNOW this morning.

It sure makes leaving for Mexico in three more days that much sweeter!!

Little piece of Heaven

Fifteen above. Sunshine. No jacket. Sunglasses. Good tunes. Long walk. Pup and I. Pure joy.

Whirlwind

What a whirlwind of a weekend! The wedding was wonderful! Very stress-free, lots of fun had by all, good friends, good times. I took about 480 pictures, although not many of the actual night itself, more of the prep and whatnot. It’s hard to have a camera strapped to your shoulder when you’re wearing a floor length, triple-skirted, dusty rose ball gown. I was on my best behavior (drunkenness excluded) and slept in my own room with my friends, no hanky panky was had – at least not by me!

The trip back to the city was only 45 minutes, but driving in blinding sun with a hangover is NOT. FUN. AT. ALL.
Sunday was all about eating and watching the Oscars with two of my favorite girlies, who have since both returned to their homes far, far away from me. *sniff, sniff*

Monday and Tuesday consisted of being at home sick, chilling out with my pup…a much needed break after the hectic craziness of the past few weeks.

Last night I managed to write to Greener Pastures explaining my disappearing act. I was honest and straightforward, explaining that things had just moved too quickly for my liking. It’s not normal to speak of meeting one’s mother & next Christmas & living together after only four (4!) days of knowing one another. At least, it’s not normal in my books. (It’s not normal, right? Do these things really happen?)

I know I sounded like an ungrateful beeyotch in my last post, but his eagerness to plan our lives together? It was seriously on the verge of being a little bit scary.
He texted this morning saying thanks for being honest, it meant a lot, and that he had sent a reply, but I have yet to receive it. I’m not sure what it is that I want him to say, because he is truly an amazing person and really genuine, I’m just worried that my feelings won’t revert back to the initial giddiness. If nothing else, I’d love if we became really good friends, because we really did hit it off on so many different levels. Anyways, nothing else I can do, so for now I’ll consider it in the past. Life is too short for regrets.

I also had a lot of time to think in the past few days of being on the couch…and I have finally dealt with any issues that were remaining from my last ‘relationship’. I thought about how lame it is for me to hang on to something that will never happen, and to someone who treated me with that cold-hearted attitude. Why bother wasting time on someone who did not waste any time on me? I think seeing him on Thursday night at a concert…with his dad…AND his girlfriend…made me come to terms with the reality of the situation. It was like a huge weight was lifted off of my shoulders.

In other news, I’m going on two dates this week. Coffee on Thursday and dinner on Friday. They both seem like really nice guys, a lot of fun, and meeting new people is always great, however it turns out. We’ll just keep the serious talk to a minimum this time around.

So, I’m pretty sure I am officially what you might consider a wingnut.

I had my heart broken not too long ago. It sucked hard. It all came down to the fact that he had no idea what it was that he wanted. He wanted me, but he didn’t know how to make it happen in his own little world. I dealt with it for four long months. I had made up my mind long ago that come February 1, if no decision had been made, that I would make the decision myself. I did this. I said goodbye to him, and moved on to find greener pastures.

The problem is, I’ve found greener pastures. Now, most of you might read and think “WTF!?! She’s found greener pastures, what the hell is her problem?”

Well, my problem is that the pastures are TOO green. They’re blindingly emerald in their greenness. So green they make leprechauns jealous, in the whole you’re amazing, I adore you, you’re beautiful, you’re an angel, 24-7, please make it stop kinda way. To me, some of the things he says are borderline cheesy. Add that to the fact that I am not used to this sort of treatment, and it makes for a very uncomfortable me, a me who is now seriously doubting her previous desire for commitment.

I have looked for this for years…the kind of guy that, well, adores me. Now I’ve found it, and I’m complaining about it like a whiney little bitch. What is freaking wrong with me?

He’s a great, great guy. He’s kind, thoughtful, handsome, funny…I love spending time with him, I love watching him with my dog. Yet, there’s something that is just not there. There’s something missing. Some little spark. I’m attracted to him, but not in the same way that I’ve been attracted to people in the past. It’s not the whole I-want-to-rip-your-clothes-off-the-minute-you-walk-in-the-door kind of attraction, and quite frankly, that’s what I’ve become accustomed to. I miss that. I miss him.

I just wrote that last sentence without even thinking. My issue is now clear to me. Me thinks I’ve moved on too fast, that obviously I have not let go of the emotions that I thought were long gone. Oh boy, quite the pickle I’ve got myself into now. What the hell do I do? Do I approach the subject and let him know what I’m dealing with? Do I ask him to cool it with the overload of affection until I get my head on straight? Do I act like nothing is wrong and deal with it on my own time? I need to be fair to him, he knew nothing of this. I can’t compare the two of them, they are two very different people, but I find myself doing it time and time again.

How do I manage to get myself in these situations time and time again?

Ack. I need some serious help.

Muy cervezas, por favor!

We're booked, and the countdown is on, baby!

In exactly 28 days, 1.5 hours, I'll be Mexico bound!

Woo-hoo! I need this vacation so very, very badly.

This willpower will self destruct

I was asked by a very dear friend to be one of her bridesmaids at her wedding this month, and all of a sudden, it's here! One week tomorrow, they will Mr. & Mrs. Crazy Eyes.

It's going to be an awesome wedding...the planning has come along wonderfully in such a short time (they only got engaged in October!). We had her shower/stagette last weekend, and now all that's left is the last minute details.

I picked up my dress yesterday, it fits perfect. It freaking well should, considering the fact that I paid almost the same price for the alterations that I did for the dress...but that's a whole other story.

The bride & groom to-be have asked me to do the slideshow for the reception. I was honored. Only thing is, I am a huge procrastinator, and I kinda sorta haven't really done much yet. So basically, I have to use my entire long weekend to get this thing completed. Good thing I work best under pressure.

Also, I had BIG fantastical plans to hook up with my groomsman. He's tall, dark and handsome, and he's good with handcuffs. (Get your minds out of the gutter, he's a cop!) We've, um, hooked up, for lack of better wording, a few times before, and it's been a running joke with the bridal party that we'd fulfill the whole sleep-with-the-bridesmaid/groomsman fantasy.

Only thing is, I really like this new guy. Really, really like him...and although it's only been a week and we haven't really had the exclusive talk yet, I just know that it's coming. Not to mention that I couldn't do that to him, he's such a sweetheart and a truly amazing person. I can really see this going somewhere, so it's totally not worth it to ruin it over something so stupid.

Next weekend should be pretty comical...I'm pretty sure that Hot Groomsman thinks that he and I are a sure thing, and once the booze starts flowing, it could get bad.

Just to be safe, I've made my old roommate cancel his room and bunk with me, because I know too well how my willpower reacts when gin and men in uniform are involved.

Coinkydink

Hmmm...Valentine's Day falls on a Wednesday this year.

Wednesday is also known as Hump Day.

Coincidence?

I think not.

Happy Heart Day to you!!

11:11

Ok, if you didn't already know, I kinda have this thing with 11:11.

It's kind of like my little good luck charm. Lately, I've been seeing it a lot. Most days I see it on the clock both times. It still freaks me out.

The past two days, a certain someone has called me at exactly 11:11 in the morning, and both nights we've hung up at the same time. He knows nothing of this, and it freaks me out even more...but in a really, really great way.

Here we go again...

After the last one, you'd think I'd be a little more cautious with the whole male species. Then again, that would totally go against my optimistic nature and my belief in happily ever after.

Once again, I'm embarking on a journey, so to speak, to find that one person that makes my heart skip a beat. It's already underway, and he seems like a really genuine guy, a breath of fresh air. A few days after we met, I found out that he's pretty close with one of my very best friend's fiance's and his family. They speak very highly of him...and trust me, any one that can hold my attention on the phone for three straight hours has got a little something going on.

We'll see where it goes, I'm not getting my hopes up quite yet. I will, however, enjoy the hell out of these first moments...you know, the ones where you're constantly smiling and walkng around humming to yourself like a big dumb moron?

Yup, I'm that girl.

Wish me luck.

Just like his mom

Sweetheart

It's totally OK to eat cinnamon hearts for breakfast, right?

That's what I thought.

The puppy formerly known as Ringo

*in best announcer voice*

And now, ladies & gents, I bring you the amazing Bauer. This feisty little pup is eleven weeks old, yet he already knows how to sit AND shake a paw. He hails from Viking, Alberta, but don't let his small stature fool you...he can headbutt his mom along with the best of them, giving her a bleeding nose in the process.

He's only had a few accidents in the house, and he chows down his kibbles like a true champ. He goes absolutely crazy for treats of any kind, even when mom hides medicine inside of them!

A trained leash walker he is not, but he does enjoy his long walks on the beach...er, around the block.

Stay tuned for many more exciting updates on little Bauer and his antics!




He's here, he's finally here! We spent a great weekend getting to know each other. I'm proud to say he already knows that I am his mom, and he's settled in amazingly well. The cat is warming up to him...SLOWLY. I pretty much love his guts already and can't wait for this day to be over so that I can go home and squish his little face!

Also, for those of you wondering about his name...yes, he was named after Jack Bauer and my love of all things '24'. ;O)

Eureka, I have found it!!!

About two months ago, my clock radio woke me up with this great song...I remember hearing it vaguely through my sleep hazed ears, but once I woke up and it came to finding out what the damn song was, I had absolutely no luck whatsoever.

I googled lyrics, I sang it for friends and co-workers alike, I even went so far as to call the radio station and sing it to them. Nada. I've had the frigging song stuck in my head since that day, and quite frankly, it's been pissing me off. Pisses me off even more that I had the song in my possession all of this time. Read on.

Today, grooving away at work, iPod on shuffle, and what song comes on?? MY SONG!! I squealed with excitement and ran into my neighbour's office. He didn't think it was as important as I did, but this was a huge event in my mundane day.

Check it out...The Arcade Fire - Rebellion (Lies).

Might not be your style, but you gotta admit, it is pretty darn catchy.

Hours of Bauer

Not this past weekend, but the weekend before that, I may or may not have watched 11.5 hours of ‘24’.

OK, I admit, I absolutely did, and I loved every second of it. I can’t stop, it’s like an addiction.

Last February, BoyAtTheTime (BATT) was told by a friend that we absolutely HAD to watch this show called ‘24’. So, with a long weekend ahead of us, I went out and bought the first season. We watched it all, the entire 24 episodes, in 2.5 days. We became addicted in an instant…Jack Bauer and CTU became our crack. We would answer our phones barking out “Bauer!” or “Almeida!”, and we even tried to get the CTU ringtone for our cell phones (shut it).

By the time summer came along, we had caught up on the first four seasons, and then we were done. Just like that. It felt like a breakup…we had no more Jack Bauer to look forward to. We were junkies coming off of our high, and let me tell you…cold turkey sucks ass.

After five long months of withdrawal, my dear younger brother presented me with Season 5 at Christmas. I was ecstatic. The day after Christmas, I had an unexpected houseguest, which was super awesome as I love her to death and loved every second of having her there, but my plans for a week long Bauer marathon were put on hold. Finally, the day before I was due back to work, I couldn’t take it any longer. Eight hours later, we’d gotten through the first two discs. Cross eyed and not wanting it to end, I moped my way to bed, where I had dreams of CTU and saving the world.

The week and a half that I had left before the Season 6 premiere was jam packed, and I was literally fretting about not being caught up on Season 5 before the new season began. The Sunday that Season 6 was starting, I woke up bright and early and popped the discs into the DVD player. Ten hours later, with a VERY clean house (what, you think I just sat on my ass ALL day? Actually, I would have, but thankfully I can see my TV from every angle in my place so it worked to my advantage!) my eyes were sore and I was seriously overloaded with all of the drama that had occurred…and I still had to watch the first half of the four hour premiere!! Needless to say, I showed up at work the next day slightly bleary eyed from lack of sleep, with a head full of nuclearbombBauerChloeCTUOMGTonyAlmeidaisdead!!

When I first started writing this, there was a point…and now I’m just coming across as slightly deranged. Hmmm…where the hell was I going with this?

OH! I remember…I was thinking about the fact that I could never work at CTU (IF CTU were an actual place and Jack Bauer was a real person**) because whenever they have phone conversations, they don’t say bye. They just hand out orders to one another and then hang up. I would get a major complex over that.

Also, I would like to have Jack Bauer’s babies.

That is all.

**I'm pretty sure I screwed up the was/were grammar rules here. For the life of me I cannot think of the proper usage. Frig.

Edit I forgot to mention, while on a kindasortablindatesetup a few weekends ago, the guy in question made the mistake of bringing up '24'. After about five minutes of discussing it, he told me that every time I mentioned Jack Bauer's name, my eyebrows shot up and my eyes got all sparkly. Now, although kind of sweet that he noticed, why has no one else ever told me this before?!?! He probably thought I was a real nut job. I most likely am. Whatever.

Get it through your thick head

When we talk and I tell you that it hurts me too much to talk to you, that I need you to stay far away until things are sorted out, what gives you the idea that you should e-mail me first thing Monday morning? Did it sound like an even BETTER idea to call me twice after I ignored your e-mail?!?!?!

I don't understand your logic in this one, sweetie, I really don't.
For the love of all things logical, please, just put down the phone and leave me be.

The next time I hear from you, I want it to be when it's time, and not a peep until then. M'kay?

New addition

Oh my god, I am going to be a mom.

Wait, hold on, not the I-peed-on-a-stick-and-it-turned-blue kinda mom, but a mom nonetheless.

Here is my new addition:



I am picking him up a week today. He is so cute I can barely stand it.
I'll give more details tomorrow, I just couldn't keep it a secret any longer!

You know you're (almost) a grown up when...

...a lady catches her heel on the slick tile floor in front of you and falls, hard, face first, scattering her belongings all around her, and you help her up and ask her if she's ok. You don't point and laugh, and even after you walk away, you still don't giggle over it.

Yay me.

(However, J, had you been with me, I most likely would have snickered just a little.)

A day late, a dollar short

So, yeah...last week was National Delurking Week. I delurked where I had to, but kind of sort of forgot to say anything about it here.

I'm a procrastinator, what can I say?
Dammit...I guess that means I just broke ANOTHER resolution. Frig.

Anyways, delurk, would ya? Say hello. It makes me feel all warm and squishy inside.

Ho Hum

Monday's go rrrrreeeeeaaaaalllllyyyy slow when my American counterparts have a long weekend and aren't blogging.

Just so you know.

Do the stars really know/

My horoscope today:

The vibration from the planets is bringing you a deeper understanding of why someone close tends to behave in a certain way. Up until now you may have been puzzled by their attitude, which seemed to show a combination of genuine affection and indifference. As you allow your mind to drift over this issue, a realization will dawn that will help you to see just what is going on.

It's been bang on all week, and today is more of the same. I have been so extremely puzzled by the IloveyouIloveyouIloveyoubutamnotsurewhattodoaboutit attitude, and last night, for whatever reason, it all started to make a little bit more sense to me.

Freaky.

Sitting, waiting, wishing

My song lyric posting was a bit dramatic, I just felt those exact feelings at that exact moment so up they went. You know…woe is me and all that jazz.

Things have been a bit of a gong show lately. It’s been really tough for me, and there are some days I do not deal with it well at all. I try my hardest, but I’ve never really been involved in a situation such as this. It’s not a case of unrequited love by any means…things are out in the open and we both know how the other feels. There are just extenuating circumstances right now that keep us from being together. Quite frankly, it sucks donkey balls, because I am the one on the shit end of the stick, so to speak. The ball is never in my court…it’s always on his schedule, and it’s finally caused me to snap a little bit inside.

I wrote to him last night and spilled my guts. I love you, I want you, but the way things are right now…that’s not gonna work for me at all. As it sits, you’ve got too much baggage for me to handle, and there’s no room in my budget for my own personal porter. It was really hard to do, as we’d had a really good night…talking about things we were gonna do in the summer, singing songs together, talking about trips…just general lovey dovey crap. I just came to realize afterwards that the way things are right now, things are not ever going to work out. There needs to be some very major changes, changes that I cannot make, changes that can only come from him. If I keep giving him love and everything that comes with it, he’ll just keep floating along, blissfully unaware of the heartache he’s causing me. I’ve expressed my feelings time and time again, and while he says the right things, I think that’s really all he’s doing…saying the right things. Somehow, I can’t help but think that my hurts fall on deaf ears, and that’s not kosher.

It kills me to think that once I step away that I’ll lose him forever, but if that’s what the final result is, then was he really ever worth it? Probably not.
So, for now, I sit and wait to see what comes of this star-crossed love of mine. Actually, wait, I take that back. I’m not going to sit and wait. I’m too good for that. I’m going to go about my life, and if he ever gets his shit together, then we’ll see where I am. Let’s just hope he doesn’t wait too long, because he’ll kick himself in the ass if he lets this one go.

Pieces

I sure find a lot of solace in song lyrics lately...


From the moment that we met
My world was turned around, upside down
To some degree I still regret my memory
For keeping you around
Girl, Boy, I thought that you were mine
But my broken heart’s been shattered
One too many times

And I don’t wanna see you anymore
I’m just not that strong
I love it when you’re here
But I’m better when you’re gone
I’m certain that I’ve given
And oh how you can take
There’s no use in you lookin’
There’s nothin’ left for you to break
Baby, please release me
Let my heart rest in pieces, in pieces

Someone let you down again
So you turn to me, your convenient friend
Oh, but I know what you’re doin’ and what you hope to find
I’ve seen it a thousand times
All the fire we had before
Are now just bitter ashes
Left scattered on the floor

We both know that you don’t need me
Let my heart rest in pieces, in pieces
Let it rest

-Rascal Flatts "Pieces"

Happy New Year!

1. What did you do in 2006 that you’d never done before? Took part in a company takeover; fell in love with someone younger than me; lived on my very own; got into my very first car accident

2. Did you keep your new year’s resolutions, and will you make more for next year? I didn’t make any last year…at least none that I remember. I did make a few for this year, and promptly broke 2 of them last night

3. Did anyone close to you give birth? 4 friends; 3 co-workers…it’s all babies, all the time lately…my mom has even been asking me when I am going to give her grandbabies…um, should probably be in a relationship for that first, non?

4. Did anyone close to you die? My great aunt in Scotland (we miss you dearly, Jessie); a close family friend, Norman (hope you’re tending bar up there!!); a friend I had met through an ex (Dog, we miss you); and my best friend’s grandmother

5. What countries did you visit? The States, and that is all, as I worked way too damn much

6. What would you like to have in 2007 that you lacked in 2006? True happiness, and someone special to share it with

7. What dates from 2006 will remain etched upon your memory, and why? April 15 – a very romantic, surprise dinner with man at the time; August 17 – Auntie Jessie passed away; August 21 – got my heart broken, but realize now that it wasn’t really all that bad; October 17 – my first meaningful encounter with someone who has really captured my heart; November 5 – being told that someone was in love with me; December 24 – saying goodbye for now to someone who is in love with me and who I love back with a fervor I’ve never felt before

8. What was your biggest achievement of the year? My promotion at work

9. What was your biggest failure? Not keeping in touch with family and friends most of the year; not saving money AT ALL; getting involved in a situation that should not ever have been because I know better

10. Did you suffer illness or injury? Screwed up back; concussion; sprained ankle; pneumonia

11. What was the best thing you bought? My new Canon XTi Digital Rebel

12. Whose behavior merited celebration? My family and friends for being so supportive while I worked my ass off

13. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed? My old company for ditching their efforts to start the new program a WEEK before it was due to begin…the project that a lot of us worked diligently on for the first 6 months of the year and gave up our lives for

14. Where did most of your money go? I have no idea. Actually, yes I do…shopping in frigging Houston

15. What did you get really, really, really excited about? When I first heard I’d be working in Houston (but that only lasted for about the first 2 weeks); my new camera; being asked to be a bridesmaid in 2 very dear friends’ weddings this year

16. What song will always remind you of 2006? “Lips of an Angel” by Hinder – it has special meaning that I am not going to go into; “This Year’s Love” by David Grey – same as the first one; “I will Follow You Into the Dark” by Death Cab for Cutie – the ex learned how to play it for me on the guitar and did so on our one year anniversary…and then broke it off 6 days later; “Chasing Cars” by Snow Patrol – the lyrics kill me, and it applies to a lot of what’s going on in my life

17. Compared to this time last year, are you: a) happier or sadder? b) thinner or fatter? c) richer or poorer? A) happier B) thinner – 4 weeks of pneumonia does that to a person C) slightly richer, but not much

18. What do you wish you’d done more of? Relaxing; talking to friends; keep better track of finances; look after myself

19. What do you wish you’d done less of? Drinking, shopping

20. How will you be spending Christmas? Already did this…with my family

21. Did you fall in love in 2006? I did, very hard…still am…not sure what’s going on with it right now though, and that’s a very hard thing to deal with

22. How many one-night stands? Oh god, do I have to answer this? Ok, fine I will, but only because I promised I would be more honest in my blog…2…but they were with guys that I had previously dated for extended periods of time, so they weren’t really one night stands

23. What was your favorite TV program? Grey’s Anatomy; 24; How I Met Your Mother…watch it if you have not…it is priceless

24. Do you hate anyone now that you didn’t hate this time last year? no

25. What was the best book you read? The Red Tent; and Wilbur Smith’s Egyptian series

26. What was your greatest musical discovery? Death Cab for Cutie

27. What did you want and get? My new camera; a promotion; a new attitude towards life

28. What did you want and not get? An actual relationship with the one that I love

29. What was your favorite film of this year? Oh frig…I have to pick one? I guess it would have to be Little Miss Sunshine

30. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you? I turned 28…on December 30th…we went rollerskating (yes, I said rollerskating, the old school, four wheel type) and then to the pub near my place…got too drunk, threw up in the bathroom, (so classy, I know, but I hadn’t had drinks in 3 weeks because of the whole pneumonia thing) and then went home

31. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying? Less work

32. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2006? I stopped trying to be too trendy…I will never be, I am more of a casual, basics kinda girl

33. What kept you sane? My girls…and running…and sadly, drinking copious amounts of vino

34. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most? Jack Bauer/Kiefer Sutherland

35. What political issue stirred you the most? Too many to count…everything seems so sad these days

36. Who did you miss? Bird; Double J; BPM – every second that I wasn’t with him

37. Who was the best new person you met? Robinson…he is like a brother to me after 6 short months…the really annoying, fun to drink with brother

38. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2006. Work is not life. Take more time for myself, appreciate the little things.

39. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year.
Ok, it doesn't sum up my year, but it's a song that has meaning to me right now, and I think it always will..."Chasing Cars" by Snow Patrol

We'll do it all
Everything On our own

We don't need
Anything Or anyone

If I lay here If I just lay here
Would you lie with me and just forget the world?

I don't quite know
How to say How I feel

Those three words
Are said too much They're not enough

If I lay here If I just lay here
Would you lie with me and just forget the world?

Forget what we're told Before we get too old
Show me a garden that's burstin’ into life

Let's waste time
Chasing cars Around our heads


Forget what we're told Before we get too old
Show me a garden that's bursting into life

All that I am All that I ever was
It’s here in your perfect eyes
They're all I can see

I don't know where
Confused about how as well
Just know that these things
Will never change for us at all