I LOVE ORIENTATION SONG&DANCE :D Spending every single day practising, singing, dancing before the dry runs start and orientation looms nearer and nearer, this can't get any better :D I think our lunches have never lasted any less than 2 hours! Plus the special trip to island creamery makes things so much more exciting!
(vanessa doesn't want to be seen so you're now seeing Smileys!)
Steady now, time to put things into a closer focus! And back to where you knew lay the best of you.
Today was yet another peaceful and pleasant lazy sunday! What made it even more pleasant was that I could actually spend it reading the entire afternoon away with tingzhang and nat at island creamery while they started studying again :D
I LOVE ISLAND CREAMERY AND YOU HAPPENING PEOPLE :D
My earphones fell apart though now I don't have these portable small ones anymore sigh!
Been reading a lot lately and I'm glad that I'm actually sitting down to read and unwind; life's been going at a breakneck pace and it gets us all blind and makes us forget the simplest of things which lie around silently, but are most crucial in keeping us steady.
Isn't this so wonderful! I think I really enjoy simple nice things so that's a start :D
It started out with a super long song&dance session today where we learnt and revised a total of four whole dances, lasting all the way past noon and creeping slowly into the late afternoons where we finally had a hearty lunch and spent a few hours laughing and talking in the eating place :D I LOVE SONG&DANCE i'm totally going to miss everyone when orientation ends.
And after that few hours of dance-learning, practising and drilling, I went to the studio in a matter of moments and I really think that today's popping and locking lessons were the best I ever had in an entire year - different instructors made it a whole lot more unique, interesting and was a complete spinoff from what i had expected the evening to be, so yay I had a lot of fun :D plus a shift in teaching focus meant that i learnt new techniques as well; excitinggggg :D
I believe i need a great deal of focus to settle some serious work. I promise myself I will have that very distinct direction to follow!
In the meantime this was a result of boredom and fadz's suggestion to post a comic strip - it isn't much and it's completely pointless but yay i had fun drawing after so long, anyway :D
MIRRORS.
Life is good :D (on second thought, except for the fact that yesterday i was playing touch rugby with a few EA guys at fort canning and i slipped on the slippery moss and crashlanded on my side and now my hip bones feel painfully strange haha!)
Enough of that thought about how much effort we put in and what's actually enough - for anything will be more than enough if we look at it in the right way :D
I spent quite a while everywhere - at home, on the train staring into space, in the studio whilst popping my arms off, in classrooms staring at blank walls (and blank faces) - trying to sort out everything and trying to find that cog that has fell out somewhere in my system, but turns out there's actually no missing part at all for what is missing is just the positivity.
I think positivity works wonders. By just allowing yourself that one chance, that one little hope of things turning right, suddenly all those thousands of problems disappear on their own accord, or you probably didn't notice yourself solving it! By not denying yourself the possibility of starting every single day as a happy boy/girl, and disregarding the assumption that you have to start the day off sad because the atmosphere around you is sad, i think i see a whole new world seriously :D
I probably sound like I'm half-awake and I'm all ready to go to dreamland but as crazy as it sounds and as idealistic as it seems, i guess it really works. From yesterday till now I think i've had simple happy things come my way, from a nice coffee treat by my buddy, to nice surprising emails, to a whole day of dance! Yes today was a pure dance day - song&dance in the morning, dance prac in the afternoon, dance lessons in the evening :D including a lesson on House which I haven't tried for nearly a year and I got horribly owned but it was tiringly fun!
You never know until you try! We all have our low points no doubt, but disbelief and narrow perspectives shouldn't be a normmmmm every single day deserves to be a happy day :D
At some point of time in school today, I was walking around the library block and it was the first time since ages ago that the school felt Empty. There're of course times where no people would be around at all but it wasn't the physical emptiness that stuck out, but the coldness and deaded feel of the place. Especially at a time like this; on a quiet weekend in the middle of the A levels with j2s still studying like mad before the end of their exams and j1s either busy burying their heads in orientation work or busy enjoying life out there, or perhaps even studying! But yes it really felt empty for the first time.
Today we had a whole day's worth of orientation games internal dry run! And it was really fun but very draining at the same time. I guess I was all drained and wiped out and I was wandering around all lost and trying to find the games people when I happened to snap these photos so perhaps the emptiness really stood out more!
The day passed really quickly. I wish my holidays won't pass this fast. It's so saddening!
A few exciting things which happened over the past week:
THE GREAT MOZZIE WIPEOUT - the stagnant, rotting, messy, dirty, grimy, disgusting council canteen area simply had to be cleaned so eventually with a lot of effort and under stanley's brainchild, the mozzie wipeout took place and we spent the whole day clearing the entire area out :D
Eventually with a lot of rubbish-clearing, vaccuum-cleaning, pail-swashing, floor-mopping, houseshed-moving and table-shifting, we pulled it off and I really hope it's in a clean state from now on! Don't want mosquitoes and funny things growing everywhere. It was seriously getting contaminated haha.
That was monday. I can hardly remember what's happened this entire week; my mind is fizzling out. Ah yes on wednesday paul tingzhang hiok and i decided to go for a random lunch at crystal jade. It was my 3rd crystal jade visit again this week, with tingzhang hahaha and we were laughing at how we opted not to have the appetiser peanuts and the wet tissues so that we could cut $2 off our bill!
Plain porridge costs $1.80 while a nice porridge with egg and meat costs $6.80, a huge difference and tingzhang keeps on going for the plain ones to cut down on his food budget, the champion. In the end it could possibly be because we're known to mess up the place and hence they gave us a broken seat when the four of us entered the restaurant!
Hahaha tingzhang wasn't happy. In the end we were slightly late for o'comm meeting because paul had to gel his hair in the toilet and we were all busy owning his hair up and down and upside down, spending about ten plus minutes at the mirrors laughing our heads off :D we then promptly decided that there was an urgent need to cab back to school, if not we'd really be horribly late!
And this is the MOST unique cab i've ever seen! Fascinating :D
Before o'comm meeting started we had a bag of marshmellows so we then conveniently decided to play Chubby Bunny with them, and we then proceeded to stuff our mouths full with marshmellows while saying Chubby Bunny loud and clear! TIDDY COULDN'T FIT ANY MORE THAN TWO HAHA and here is hiok with his mouth full. Quite successful he had six or seven in his mouth :D
Thursday was a really tough day; O'team cut results were out and I guess SongnDance really lost our core driving force of people ): Gah the toughness of it all - it was a really painful morning where we all really got sombre and we felt like a whole lot had been taken out of us. Nothing, and really nothing can take away what we all put together.
The lunch we all had afterwards was really nice (: had a great deal of laughter especially when we each ordered a personal set and yet ordered a group set so in the end we had a total of 10 cups of pepsi and 10 bowls of soup for just 6 people at one single table hahaha!
It seriously looked quite funny. And yes cheryl taking all of the pepsi!
Plus dylan who's actually a really experienced camwhore! Haha he competed with cheeyang to see who could finish an entire cup of pepsi in the shortest time and he got owned upside downnn because cheeyang simply pour the entire cup down his throat. And they both ended up really bloated and feeling horrible!
SongnDance is the best of the best :D not all of us are here but we all are just the besttt :D
It's been a fun week! I shall be a good student and attempt some research tomorrow, or else I'll never be able to start on history! :D
And I say: Never, ever underestimate the power of good sleep. I just woke up a few minutes ago in the school library and I think I can't look any closer to a panda but my mind is finally fresh for once and I think I'm a little more driven. This is going somewhere :D
Shall continue this post when I'm back home! (edit: In the end I just fell asleep after a long day with dance lessons at the end!)
I spent quite a while sitting alone in the canteen today in the evening past seven, and it was (very unfortunately, only) my first time I really started to slow down and sort out everything that's been happening so far. Things have been going at a crazy pace, and I must admit I've somehow deteriorated into this state of daily blankness which has only served to ruin myself, seriously.
I slowly realized a lot of things by just allowing myself to have that free space of about half an hour. Well limes limes limes, why are you putting yourself at a checkpoint? You're giving yourself time to breathe, to rest, to stop and prepare, and you are already ready to go and all revved up to start living a most fulfilling life in which you are going to achieve so much, but the truth is that you never really start. You're ready with all those big plans but where's the first heavy step which you need to take out of your resting station? You've got a long road to go and you shouldn't be sitting by the pit stops.
The difference that really matters, lies in one's ability to (1) start things, and (2) keep them going. It's just that simple; it's a pity that we find it so difficult. But the truth is that we do find it hard. Why so - because we sometimes do not have the strength to keep things going. Why the lack - because we sometimes believe that we're not up to it. Why the disbelief - because we're unsure and we're uncertain of how things will turn out to it. This applies for almost every single little thing in our lives, and anything is possible. Before you allow yourself to hit rock-bottom once again, explore the possibilities; Rising up high is not any harder than hitting rock-bottom.
And I guess the mastermind behind all these negativities is Fear.
It's fear. Fear is stopping you from doing your best, going the extra distance, pushing the extra mile. Fear hinders your motivation; you'll feel much weaker than what you really are. Fear stops in your tracks, literally, mentally too. It binds you to a spot and embraces delusion and safety. It celebrates conservatism and celebrates unchanged comfort. It is an enemy of motivation, an enemy of passion and drive. It backstabs dreams and betrays hopes. All because we are Scared, and we Don't Dare. Fear is nothing, I want to say.
It's completely nothing, nothing.
I will make it nothing.
A very nice page from a nike training book I found a few days ago. Reading through it really makes me wonder - sometimes we're all strong heroes in our own way. We're holding ourselves back.
The past week was moderately fine when I posted on wednesday but it later become a big blast when friday and saturday popped up! And yes Popped up literally, for friday's pop-lock classes were really tough considering it was my first time attending a higher-level popping/locking lesson in more than half a year and it left me all tired and just wanting to plod along back home and collapse into bed. Which i eventually did after a few hours of lazing around at home!
Have been hanging around with tingzhang for the past few days and haha things have been really really fun, like eating ajisen ramen at compass point an hour before dance and watching him getting owned by the chilli. And loads of funny stuff like how we randomly met TODAY on a sunday! At ikea :D haha tingzhang rocks :D
I realize I've been dancing a lot lately too! Restarting lessons at studio wu + orientation song and dance + talentime practices = absolute fun. Especially song and dance omg it's really getting so exciting with the dance being so cool I can hardly wait for orientation to come! And song and dance meetings are always so fun with crazy people and crazy dancing woohoo :D
Talking about dance I seriously have got to get better. Was surfing around youtube a few minutes ago and I watched a few videos of Kite, this japanese popper whom Josh told me about a few days ago, most noted for his use of legs in his popping and it's really really fantastic haha maybe if I drill it over the next few months I just might get closer to this!
It's a nice morning and I've got 8 hours before another meeting starts in school so off I go!
Reaching school later than expected, I was left with only a few puny minutes to get myself a good run and some training, and in the end I obviously stopped and felt very disappointed about the utter lack of time and the heavy morning traffic that has caused it. A meeting soon ensued where I learnt about new happenings and ultimately it wasn't really a good meeting to kickstart council work after the long OP drought, but the day's passed!
I remembered this very lazy and lofty day, that sometimes what you hinge your expectations and beliefs on may very well turn its head and be the source of your doubt if you don't get it into your mind and live it outright. Lately lots of us have been revisiting the point of how to live our lives especially in such a fast-paced place where we can't really fully stop and point at our failures and learning exactly what went wrong and how we can do it better; I this at this point of time, it's not really possible every single day.
Look ahead, live life the way you want it - that's just how simple it is, and it is seriously really that simple. Live it strong, live it complete, then I can safely tell myself at the end of two wholesome years that I have given nothing less than of my very best, and I will hence know that these two years I have really given my all, and know that it's been worthwhile. Feel happy for the company, feel happy for the times! Yes yes a good mindset is all it takes!
The rest of the day was just good - spent the early half of the afternoon at Ikea shopping for furniture along with a group of friends who went sliding around in the trolleys and spent huge bucks on ice-creams and hot dogs, not to mention sharon and her multitude of currypuffs hahaha she was thinking very critically in a small about whether she should buy more currypuffs :D
After that I managed to catch 007: Quantum of Solace at tampines mall with tingzhang who was just so nice to come all the way to tampines to watch it :D It was a really cool movie and I realized that my phone is the same as Bond's! Just that his is the titanium silver special edition of the C902 haha. Pretty much a sequel to Casino Royale, but could've been more thrilling. But then again I couldn't ask for a cooler movie in these times :D
I was scrolling through my iPod today and I found this song, and I really really like it! An excerpt:
Finding my own words, my own little stage My own epic drama, my own scripted page. I'll send you a rough draft, I'll seal it with tears, Maybe you'll read it and I'll re-appear.
From the start it was shaky and the characters rash A nice setting for heartache where emotions come last All I have deep inside, to overcome this desire Are friendly intentions and fair-weather smiles.
It was the first weekend in more than a year, that I could safely and confidently say that I had absolutely nothing to do, nor wanted to do anything else, other than kick back and enjoy the lull of the holidays, just for this weekend exclusively. PW OP ended in a horrible disaster I must say - I now severely detest my laptop for malfunctioning for the one and only time, during the actual presentation itself where it started autoclicking like nobody's business and my presentation slides just rushed through. Every single person in the room developed an utterly awed/shocked expression and they probably assumed I was a madman sabotaging my group and happily clicking away while I was frantically trying to stop my laptop from autoclicking further. Thank goodness it eventually stopped and I managed to promptly apologise for the technical error before any further damage was done, but I seriously seriously hope PW won't turn out too badly! We slogged too many late nights and too many months for this to just end this way. But nevertheless I still love all the fun and laughter I had with my teammmm they rock and I know we did our best and we laughed the loudest too :D
A big portion of that very friday evening after a whole afternoon of presentations was spent at Rafflesian Spotlight. In abhinav's words, truly a runaway success, many many times greater and more wonderful since its debut in 2005!
Plus the performances were really great as well - no lack of singing talent every year, plus the fact that this year, the open category had immensely stiff competition with dancers, bands, beatboxers even! and yes well the comedians took the crown again!
Plus some of us were invited back for guest performances! I truly loved the songs sung by jiawei and louis :D and titus never fails to save the day by making the entire crowd laugh their heads off. And I truly enjoyed my time on stage dancing away like I never had before. It truly turned my day around :D
Maybe I'll post a video when I get one!
Other than that, the weekend was spent walking around shopping, talking, thinking, lazing around, allowing my mind to free up and enjoy some peace before settling into a good frame of mind again! Today was first spent hanging around in dhoby ghaut then signing up again for dance with boss and vinna, plus enjoying good icecream :D THEN CAME A01C CLASS CHALET MADNESS!
Here I was, stupidly taken bus 403 down into pasir ris beach and realizing that the whole class wasn't at the bungalow and they were enjoying a few hours of arcade at White Sands. So I had to endure the rain and thunder and waited a longggg while before I got back to the interchange.
In the end when I reached the interchange, I had to go back again HAHAHA but I had a lot of fun :D
