I'm back
After the retreat camp i feel so renewed, i've achieved many objectives and wants in my life.
1st objective met, Make new friends
2nd objective met,Survived!
3rd objective met, Understood more about god
4th objective met, Got to know her as a personal friend
5th objective met(but not desired at all), made many new enemies....zzzzz
Whilst i did achieve many new goals and satisfied my wants i also made more enemies, while i did'nt really enjoy the camp, the only thing going was that i knew i was different, i would not sink to their level. I had toothpaste squeezed in my eyes, i had soap thrown at me, i had LIQUID soap thrown at me together with some tissue paper. I will not sink to their level but instead i forgive and i pray to god that they can change their ways.
God has been there for me the past 3 days. On Friday i prayed that she would come the next day, and she DID! I then prayed in the afternoon that i'd get a chance to talk to her and be friends and IT HAPPENED! That night at the party on pure help i took some chocolates and went over to Daryl Gasper who happened to be sitting near her , she turned and took one piece and i was like eh......then she put it back i said ah nevermind just take it. Soon music started playing and the kids were dancing but instead of that i had a nice long chat with her over computers, Daryl was starting to think i had it working out but i can tell myself safely that i instead of being happy i felt i was dealing with just another client. It feels just funny. That night we traded numbers and email addresses and well yeah, friends.
I did get to talk to her again but not as long as i had hoped for. Today we went down back to church and got the letters from our parents, mums letter was very very touching i regret writing something so insensitive back. I have learnt new things and made enemies but i have succeeded in my goal and ambitions.
Cheerio.
11/27/2005 05:15:00 pm
Wednesday, November 23, 2005Today
Well today was ratjer boring...In the morning i went to school thinking there was band but whoops there wasn't heheh, so after running into school in the bloody rain, i waited and had a nice chat with the security guard on duty not long after i saw Jeff, Ben Lye and a few other Robotics guys coming. I talked to them and at 11 the guard went off shift to get food and offered to open the side gate for us, we obliged and followed. After getting home i played till like...3? Then dad came home and gave bro and I $300 each pocket money, $100 more for me to get books but hell i only need $50 and less for new books :P, all because he struck 4d 1st prize. 10k i heard. Lucky my father. On his car number too. Dad later asked me to follow him down to bishan and get the new computer made for bro. I obliged and followed and negotiated parts with the supplier, after settling for an $860 deal for a new PC without GFX i tried negotiating for an AMD anthlon but i decided that even though it was faster and cost only $11 more it could overheat and burn out way faster. So i stuck with the Intel. I stood and waited for Dad to return with the Deposit money and while waiting this woman,whom i earlier thought was man because of the way she dressed, came in with her son to get her son's pc fixed, i offered advice on the situation and they went with the ATI 9600 instead of the Nvidia 6200. My knowledge of Computers is legendary :P ....I wish.
Anyway after coming home i played Sims for a while till 7, then watched Tong Xin Yuan till 7.30 and went for carolling. Was rather early, Melissa was upstairs and was silently watching me as i stood on the 1st floor reading my book i testify that it was rather creepy to have someone watching you. Then i decided to go up and i leaned against the balcony and played Jawbreaker first. Jess arrived early and opened the door. Set out the scores and what not. John and the other Carollers arrived later abit and we started pract. The basses/tenors were just Cletus and myself. Sad aint it? Cletus and I had abit of problems in pitching , rather high the notes yah? After pract Cletus offered to send us home, he took Petra, Iddie and myself home. But before that he dropped me at the post office to help him post his letter, i sprinted there and back. When we reached my estate i got out and bid them good bye till thursday, I heard the voices in the back say see ya. I walked up to the lift and up to the house, when i came home i had a little fun chat with John's brother , Joseph. Went in and noticed mum was home, she bought dinner, yay i thought. Chicken Porridge from Meng's Kitchen mmmm...after eating i was told by Gyver that there was a new patch for BF 2 SF and zoomed of to get it. But it took 1 hour so i spent 30 mins talking on MSN with Daryl Gasper, my pal from church , my confidente. Then played Sims for the next 30 mins. Then when the patch was ready patched SF and played till 2.30am. Then here i am now. Blogging for 30 mins...See ya night and good morning till next time....
LIES :P
Theres more to read. Well anyway besides the journal entry, My emotional self is relieved that Iddie is not pissed with me, thank goodness don't want anyone to be hating me or anything. Maybe she was just in a bad mood. Anyway aside from that i'm looking so forward to the camp, i hope she comes. I hope she comes! I can't stop myself as i keep thinking about her, she enters my thoughts when ever i clear my mind. Wonders of when i will ever be with her. Sigh mushy stuff. This time really, nights...morning more like it lol
11/23/2005 03:02:00 am
Monday, November 21, 2005pe
How good it is to be paid, but how bad it is to be paid peanuts?
Thats all literally, I got my pay today but my pay was only $11.40, pathetic huh?
Saturday
Went for training as usual, owned the social players as usual. Went for mass, things got a little interesting when i entered the compound absurdingly early at 4.30. Who should i meet when i walk up the stairs other then her? She asked you're early, what brings you down so early. I reply just lazy to go home so i came here first, and i need one good reason to sell these coupons for my job, at this point she starts becoming abit shifty and says uh, oops gotta go see you later. I reply after her and say did'nt expect you to donate. Well mass as usual attended with Thomas. Went for Youth Cafe, this week was rather interesting, met Hansel there and decided to attend with him instead of the guys. I decided that it was also a perfect place to ask for donations, and half way through she came up and says, nah i would'nt donate, properbly go to your kids. I could have swore this brought a little chuckle to her as we both knew it was sarcastic. After youth cafe went to the toilet and talked awhile with hansel and walked off knowing i had a match at 11 against @mp. As i walked out of church i met Deborah and Stanley and chatted with them for a while. I crossed the road and apparently met Hansel and Olga. Chatted abit about jobs with them and who else to join us other then Ben Lim, Alessa, Adam and her? The bunch of us decided were talking about jobs, she cut in and made the statement money is desirable. I agreed with her. When i think about it is that she wanted to be in the conversation. After Ben and Alessa left it was just the 3 of us, Hansel and Olga left on an earlier bus. We chatted awhile, she asked if i could tell her if i got the job. The clerk job, guess i got to tell her no haha. Anyway she felt the job was interesting and wanted to see if she could get a post with me. Hmm, i don't know is this a hint? I suck bad at reading signs. She left on the 163 and i talked with Adam until i got off the bus that we took. Rushed home for the match and we won Trashing @mp with 2-0.
Sunday
Went for choir in the morning, iddie seemed to be ok right about then, but after breakfast she seemed very very grouchy. She seemed to be angry with me, not sure what i did there but whatever it is sorry. Left during carrols and went for the assembly, attended with Anthony, had lunch with Alfred's mum. The parish assembly brought me a greater sense of belonging and many of the seniors were glad to see the youth there. The rest of the youth, Eunice and the bunch left really early. But Anthony and I stayed on. After the assembly i left and went to J8 to wait for the movie. Had lunch with Kor Bobby, Bro , Sis and Mum. Then watched Goblet of fire. I can promise its goodness, its amazing but they cut too many parts of the story. went home slept early
Monday-now
Woke up at 8.30, had 3 sandwiches, yes was terribly hungry, played games for a while and went to get my pay , Miss Sue was late and i was forced to wait. I left my job after i got my pay. Went to Get BF2 SF with the guys and came home to play till recently. Can't find a good job. Sian. Anyway tommorow i have band.
------------------
That aside, journal completed.
I look forward to the church camp, i really hope she's going, it'll give us alot of opportunity to bond. I'll get to meet other interesting youths too, but no one can match you. I think we're ment to be together. Just not now. There isn't a day that goes by where i don't think of you. In the quiet of my mind you are the person i think of all the time. I have fallen for you. If the person i'm adressing knows that it is her that i'm talking about, i hope you feel the same way.
I'm off, going to watch a show.
11/21/2005 11:55:00 pm
Friday, November 18, 2005Nah bei, got myself a freakin Sai Kang job. Very shitty. Selling Donation tickets....50 of them! At $3 each in order to get $30 ??? SAI KANG AH!! I'm quiting come tuesday. I'll apply for that accounting job. Bloody hell man. WTC turned out SHIT! Lost both matches shit man! Tommorow dun feel like attending training sia.
11/18/2005 09:07:00 pm
Wednesday, November 16, 2005The world is getting too small for coincidences
The world is getting too small for coincidences i must say....
This morning after bio class, we ended early by the way, went to thomson playa with Su Qi, Rachel and Wee Yang. Rachel wanted to get her Sims 2, so we accompanied her. When we reached we were too early and decided to grab a bite or a coffee. We walked to BK and looked at the price and walked off..walking to food palace we saw a crowd of BPSians and walked off. We went back to BK and ate there. We had our breakfasts there and Bpsians walked in after eating to study, then some Sec 1 kids from school. Saw some church peeps too. We sat at BK and talked about all sorts of things in the mean time. When we finially saw the shops open we went to look for the best deal on the game and we looked around and settled with popular. We saw alot of Dan Brown books and stood to read the back covers, i explained the number I, the imaginary number of negative square root 1. As we walked to take the bus who to run straight into then her?? Stopped and had a short chat for a moment and told her i'd see her saturday. Continued on where the gang was waiting. They asked who's that? I told them.. "Her..." Su Qi and Rachel were laughing uncontrollably and i told them to sush up..Wee Yang later said, so old looking got pimples somemore...sorry Wee Yang i think you don't see it clearly. Su Qi and Rachel after telling them her personality agreed with me that i made a good choice, inbetween of a good face and a great character. When we reached the bus stop the busses came just as we reached. We all boarded our busses and went home. Upon reaching home i noticed the air con repair men were there. I went in and played BF 2 till just recently. Now going for some COD 2 see ya
11/16/2005 03:30:00 pm
Sunday, November 13, 2005Sunday...
Choir this morning was ok....i played somewhat alright. I think, i owe Daniel 2 bucks next sunday, had to borrow i'm bankrupt this morning. We had quite a good time at choir a few laughs, the animals stood up to gaze on his head...somehow it became graze....the manger his bed became the manger his head lol.... Went for lunch with Brennan and Daniel again but did'nt eat, spent quite a while looking for Daniel's shirt but could'nt find a nice one. Daniel had a long case of big bombs so he told Brennan and i to go off first. Brenann and I managed to have a good chat , met Zhang Wen at the Bus stop as we boarded, when i got home i played Civ 4 for the whole afternoon, then went to get 3 new shirts($100 total) and just got home , going to spam civ 4 now see ya...
11/13/2005 07:25:00 pm
Unforgettable day?
Yesterday started the day off with a trip to Marriot's hotel down at orchard with Bro and Mum for a buffet breakfast. Its that good, but just did'nt eat as much as i expected. Anyway what ever i ate then fueled me all the way to night so what ever. After breakfast we spent nearly 1 hour talking cock while sitting down at the breakfast table.
Talking cock(singaporean slang)- To make small talk
After leaving the hotel mum had to go to holland v and bro had to go pay his piano teacher. I made my way down to cityhall to rendevous with the SAF guys before training except i was 2 hours early and spent nearly 2 hours reading the Da Vinci code, I've gotten quite far in those 2 hours haha...
Training was good very good. I enjoyed it very much. My team was fabulous, the best team to work with. Maxxtro and I were pumping machine gun rounds into the chinese base down stream but in the end all bases were captured and all but little freekill in his heli flying too high to see haha.
After training rushed down to church, attended mass with Yong Kang, spent lots of time before mass talking to him. Definately a good way to spend time, to get together with a friend you haven't met for nearly 2 months in person. After mass was the youth cafe, something i'll never forget! Never! It was really fun, i've got a group of great buddies whom i met at the cafe, something that i'll never regret. The programme was good, especially the grill the priest, very entertaining with some "stupid" questions being asked ha!
Su Qi called around 9pm during the toilet break as i walked down with the dudes while talking i walked right past that person, i do wish i could have another private moment with her at least..sad...anyway when i left i told myself i will come back next week and i'll enjoy it even more. As i walked off in the opposite direction from my new friends i could'nt help but smile at what a fabulous day it was. I took the bus home because i was tired and played abit of Civ 4 before sleeping.
Will post today's events after getting home later...
11/13/2005 05:52:00 pm
Wednesday, November 09, 2005the next time anyone especially girls, sees somebody you don't know pointing a video cam at you make sure you know what to do. After receiving a disturbing Email about PF lenses....
PF lenses allow the camera-man to see anything under thin clothing...yes that means your privates....so don't just stand and let the person shoot you or you may just be the feature star on a porn website somewhere. I'm sure nobody wants to fall victim to that kind of a fate. So girls be on your guard, and guys don't be stupid and purposely point video cameras at girls....no fakies here....Its not morally right.
Whoever invented the PF lenses are either the most pervertic people on earth or they are the most smartest people ever. I go with the first choice.
11/09/2005 11:24:00 pm
Monday, November 07, 2005Numa Numa
This song, Numa Numa.....its so popular and its so frickin nice! Its just addictive, its just plain funny!, That guy...Gary , the dancer of the frickin funny NUMA dance haha. So damn funny! http://www.newgrounds.com/portal/view/206373 , just click play movie i suggest play the 3rd option its damn funny.
11/07/2005 11:32:00 pm
Sunday, November 06, 2005Up early
Today I'm up really early, lets look at business prepositions
Accounting Month, November 2005
3-Nov Debit Credit
Capital $40
Cash $40
Owner started business with $40
3-Nov
Sales/Services $10
Cash $10
Conducted Sales
6-Nov
Sales/Services
Cash $?
Conducted Sales $?
Well the question marks are to mean that the job has not even been done yet but i enter it eitherway. I'll be servicing yet another PC today, if i do a good job my client says he'll pay an extra $10, no problem! But yet another classic case of Pebkac!
Anyway, I signed up for the youth cafe thing, i've no idea why i did it in the first place, because i was immediately approached after mass and i did'nt think twice, because i wanted to?, because of the desire to meet friends or people?, meet someone?... I don't even know why lol. Anyway it sounds interesting so i'll go anyway. I mean its just a cafe after mass, 7.15 to god knows what time, how bad can it be?
Yesterday's lan training wasn't too bad, i had to borrow a ton of cash from Gyver, I'm feeling utterly BROKE!!! My poor pocket is empty, and i can't withdraw from "company" funds. Lest i call it drawings. Anyway ride home was interesting...I sorta stopped at braddel and found i was still at Toa Payoh...so i took a bus and landed at Bishan or near anyway. I ran to the Raffles institution bus stop and took 410 to church and still had half an hour to spare.
I saw a good buy on a laptop yesterday! 900$ for...
2.2Ghz Pentium 4
256 DDR Rams
40 GB HDD
Radeon 320m
Not too bad! I want this if i had the cash!
11/06/2005 05:58:00 am
Friday, November 04, 2005Been doing abit of really extra late night reading and i got bored and read up on elton john which on wikipedia. Once done i read the related section and stumbled upon the incest section which is the marriage of siblings to silbings or child to parent, or person to cousin so on so forth...I stumbled upon this article as i read on as it goes its freaky to know that the person next you in school might be a very distant relative, or that girl you like may actually be your distant cousin that you have never met before or known relations to. Its just freaky and Stella, Church one yes, i think this answers what you said to me at the church camp earlier this year. I repeat your statement, somewhere along the line we may actually be related. I do think there is a very high chance that we are related at some point as the odds are high and we do bear the same last name. So i think that answers your question.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Pedigree collapse is a term created by Robert C. Gunderson to denominate the collapse of the family trees caused either by close cousin marriages or distant cousins unknowingly getting married.
If we assume that there is a new generation each 25 years, over 600 years a single person can have up to 224 or roughly 16 million possible ancestors. But if go back another 600 years (to 800AD), that will get us 248. That would be 281.5 trillion ancestors, far more people than have existed throughout the history of humanity.
The catch is that ancestors along the way married their cousins, often without knowing it but in many cases intentionally. This is pedigree collapse; the closer the cousin, the bigger the percentage of the collapse. Of course the worst case is when two siblings got married (think royalty-wise for instance) when it is a 50% collapse. With a first cousin, it is a 25 percent collapse, and so on.
In some cultures, cousins were encouraged or required to marry to keep kin bonds, wealth and property within a family. Among the royalty, the frequent requirement to only marry other royals resulted in a reduced gene pool where most individuals had extensive pedigree collapse. Alphonso XII, for example, had only eight great-great-grandparents instead of the usual sixteen. Isolated populations such as remote islanders represent extreme examples of pedigree collapse but the ordinary tendency to marry those within easy walking distance along with the relative immobility of the population before modern conveniences meant that most marriage partners were distantly related. Even in America, the tendency of immigrants to marry among their ethnic, language or cultural group produces many cousin marriages.
Demographer Kenneth Wachtel estimated that for a typical English child of the mid-20th century, at the time of Columbus, 95 percent of his ancestors would have been different individuals and 5 percent duplicates. At the time of the Black Death, an average of 70 percent would have been duplicates.
The maximum number of ancestors for most people is likely to occur around 1200 AD. Some geneticists believe that everybody on earth is at least 50th cousin to everybody else!
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Freaky Yes?
11/04/2005 12:30:00 am
Thursday, November 03, 2005Work is hard but money is sweet
I got my first pay today. From my first customer. $10 for repairing his PC, a classic case of Pebkac. Most computer problems are like that anyway. The main problem in fixing the PC was the lack of space to work in. In simple words, the PC is very very small Its so small that i had to remove his A drive and D drive just to get to his hard drive. Troublesome Compaq shit. Anyway just goes to tell me how much i need to be prepared for the type of PCs i might handle.
Advertisement! Computer repairs look for me starting from $10 and up!
11/03/2005 07:10:00 pm
Wednesday, November 02, 2005
A little something from Call of duty 2, spliced up by some guy from COD files. Thanks for the well done wall paper. Looks real good on the desktop! At the rate i'm going i'll finish any game that comes out in my free time in less then 2 days. Nothing stands in my way apparently. I did fear in 7 hours, COD in 1 day, AOE in 12 hours. Nothing is standing in my way. I need a nice long game! If COD 2 had a wider focus on medics and teamplay and some DECENT ragdolls i would title it best game of the year ever nominated!
11/02/2005 11:08:00 pm
Tuesday, November 01, 2005Inspiration
Well today wasn't the most fantastic day, i spent nearly 2/4 of it sleeping. I got so tired that i nearly slept infront of the PC in the midst of call of duty 2! Its just amazing how tired i was. Had a really LONG breakfast after all saints day mass today. John and Jess treated us to breakfast, having breakfast like this actually reminds of family. Isn't it just great to have that feeling that you belong to something bigger? Anyway I've been enjoying COD 2 for the past day or so, and i stumbled across a great song, somewhat relevevant to what i feel.
YOU'RE THE INSPIRATION (Chicago)
You know our love was meant to be
The kind of love that lasts forever
And I need you here with me
From tonight until the end of time
You should know, everywhere I go
You're always on my mind,
in my heart In my soul
You're the meaning in my life
You're the inspiration
You bring feeling to my life
You're the inspiration
Wanna have you near me
I wanna have you hear me sayin'
No one needs you more than I need you
And I know, yes I know that it's plain to see
We're so in love when we're together
And I know that I need you here with me
From tonight until the end of time
You should know, everywhere I go
You're always on my mind,
in my heart In my soul
You're the meaning in my life
You're the inspiration
You bring feeling to my life
You're the inspiration
Wanna have you near me
I wanna have you hear me sayin'
No one needs you more than I need you
----------------------
Although it seems rather mushy to the end but it does have some meaning to it. A really good piece. Anyway i'll leave this here, i need to go shoot up more Germans. I'm sorta out of the mood for talking unless well you get the idea... anyway off....