Its over for now.....
Long one today.....well...the reunion on Christmas Day went quite well. We spent 35$ each at the ship, each of us having a steak a bun and a desert to go. Additionally each of us spent about 15$ on some drinking. Su Qi was quite hilarious to the point that she didn't want to take the first sip of her drink out of pure guilt that her mum would freak if she told her she drank alcohol.
Spent a madly long time doing Christmas shopping prior to Christmas day, on top of all the carolling, that ridiculous Biochem project....my god.... I tell you thats probably the reason i'm so sickly at the moment.
Anyway boxing day wasn't much easier...met Clarice to discuss the timings for the Bchem project....had flute sectionals with Kai Yi , Elisse and Mitchell. Then went to Zi Wei's place to TRY to play Rome TW...to no avail....
Today the 27th of December wasn't any much better...in fact it was a killer day....Woke up at 9am...finished up the project and uploaded and notified clarice to no avail...late for wedding at 10.30 (left the house at 10.15), wedding sounded screwed up to me......rushed off to school only to be SMSed by Chien Wen halfway to tell me we had an SCC audition today! So I cabbed home, got my saxophone and file and got back into the cab and back to NP. Midway band prac, Clarice tells me theres something wrong with the project, I try my best but ran out of battery, played for audition (sounded alright to me judging we didn't practice together at all), after band prac went to Alumni Clubhouse for dinner to get my FIRST meal of the day ( I didn't eat at all today since Zi Wei's home the night before), attended the NP strings concert and got back at 10pm to rush the project and finally submit it and now I'm sitting here typing this entry...coughing like mad....I seriously should get more rest....
I think i didn't have my holidays at all. Most of it is gone doing other stuff which technically holidays aren't really for.....sigh...I need a REAL holiday...
This shot was just taken...my messy room with bro walking from his side of the room to the door...you haven't seen my other half of the room...its just as bad...
12/28/2008 12:37:00 am
Saturday, December 20, 2008Are we human or are we dancer? O_O
A wonderfully beautiful tune to listen to is "The Killers" track and hit song "Human"
The lyrics and musical accompaniment are astounding and touch the root of my soul. While not an impressive song at first hearing, it seeps into one's mind because of its very "Human" nature. The odd set of lyrics "Are We human or are we dancer". Linguistically it makes no sense. However a deep inferred meaning would probably mean are we really truly human and independent or do we really follow what everyone else does. Like dancers to music.
Is this perhaps what we are? Or are we truly human?
Anyway, the hardest part of December is actually over, common tests ended, AEOC is over. Now remains house to house carolling, band practice and camp for rondeau and preparing for the SCC auditions. I hope not to disappoint my friends, Max, Winston and Chien Wen and I hope their faith in my musical ability stands true when we go for that audition. We're doing it with no prior practice because I don't have the time schedule to make practices with them. I'm no musical genius nor am I musical prodigy but I will sure as hell try my best and make sure we make that audition and get into the concert.
Open house is coming, that means we got to get the stage band up for performance and that means work....on top of that the end of the 1st term means the second is coming and the hell (and worse part of the semester) is coming. Common test 2 and finals. There's alot to look forward to in the coming months but there's also alot of work to be done.
The entrepreneurship project still hasn't been tended to. I should give steph a call soon and find out whats up on her part....a storm is coming and I can not only feel it coming but i can see it too.....
I look forward to the 25th, the reunion of old friends. The people who i spent my sec 3 and 4 years crapping about and laughing with. Now all legally 18 and all bright and cheery due to the festive mood, perhaps we can relive the good old days once more before the year ends and we move on to the 19th year of our lives.
12/20/2008 12:00:00 am
Thursday, December 11, 2008The biggest mistake of my life
The biggest mistake of my life was believing that you were not one for me. After so long, I realize i was wrong about you. Maybe you are who i may be looking for. Though now it's too late. Too much time has passed and things will never be the same again. If I could change what I did not do in the past, perhaps things would have turned out different. It was my greatest mistake to believe that our differences were too much. I guess i'm the one who has truly lost out here. Perhaps you'll never know who you are. Who am I referring to here, i won't say. I won't make another mistake pertaining to this. Search back into the past and maybe you may know who you are.
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I guess i was always looking in the wrong places when what i've been looking for was always there....
sigh..
Last one tomorrow. I've gotta to make this count....
12/11/2008 12:51:00 pm
Sunday, December 07, 2008Things I do not have
Things have been really busy so far, lots of school work, choir practices, band practices and whole lotta crazily insane stuff.
Emotionally I'm distraught, perhaps withdrawn from the world due to matters relating to personal friendships and affairs of the heart. Things haven't been easy and I've been trying to stay above the situation. Every day I tell myself, today will be a better day, with little change. I watch and see the people I helped and prayed for get what they want but what about me? Is there anyone out there that prays or wishes well for me?
Physically I'm tired. Tired of all the studying, the stress, the pressures of dealing with choir, band and school work all at the same time. Every day is like running a marathon. I really can't wait for the CT's to be over and for AEOC to be done with.
Mentally I'm on the breaking point of insanity. Too many things to do, too little time to do them. If i could freeze time for just a day. I would be able to make the best of things.
Spiritually I'm depleted. I still believe in the lord almighty, but now I feel that perhaps I'm running out of faith. So far nothing good has really happened to change my life.
Every day i try to be the best person I can be. I try to be everyone's friend and no one's enemy. I try to make good music no matter how horrible my timing may be. I try to enjoy life even through its suckiest moments and days.
Perhaps just one day, one day...I will find the person I've been searching for since the day I was born. Somebody to understand me, somebody who'd take me for who I was, somebody that would tell me I did good even when i did not, somebody to tell me life's alright when it sucks too much...I believe that in life, everyone has a soul mate.
Anyway..the main 3 targets upcoming during common test....
Biochemistry
Instrumental and Analytical Chemistry
Molecular Biology
First lets break down some of the terms here...
Chemistry – Subject, The study of the reaction of stuff with other stuff
Biology – Subject, The study of all the stuff that happens in you or any living organism
Molecular – Adjective, really small stuff
Instrumental – Pertains to stuff which is required to do other stuff
Analytical – Deep thought that few people can achieve, when looking at numbers or words
Therefore,
Biochemistry – Subject relating to the reaction of stuff with other stuff in a living organism
Instrumental and Analytical Chemistry – Subject that requires you to use tools to achieve a mental state of deep thought when looking at numbers or words
Molecular Biology – Subject relating to a very small study of stuff that happens in living organisms.
This is just for my own humor, if you don't get the joke don't bother.
Well back to work now...I can't let my feelings overtake me. I need to be fully composed for the events of the next week. Common Tests to AEOC. Its a long road.